


Gift of a Lifetime

by MissRiah



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Coming of Age, F/M, Mild Language, Sexual Content, Teen Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-26
Updated: 2014-06-13
Packaged: 2018-01-26 16:23:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 82,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1694765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissRiah/pseuds/MissRiah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was an accident; it was just once, but sometimes once is all it takes. And even though he didn't belong to her, he would still stand by her side through it all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. We're all Happy

She could remember the heat between their skins; shivers went up her spine as she recalled the feeling of his hands in her hair. Vague memories of his lips against hers danced across her mind; he tasted like alcohol, but she couldn't really complain- she must have tasted the same. Her hands tingled whenever she remembered how the fabric of his jacket felt knotted between her fingers and his hair soon after.

She was sure she could bring more memories to surface, but the idea of delving any further made her entire body flush; the idea of crawling under a rock sounding like a top-notch plan. More importantly, Korra tried not to think of that night at all. Not because it had been awful; awkward, maybe, but she couldn't remember enough of it to know. But the real reason she kept the memories locked away was because the incident had been unplanned. It hurt her more however, to realize that the act wasn't out of love or passion, but out of inebriation. She knew she could never have him in that type of situation where they were both aware of their actions. But whenever she recalled it, she felt embarrassed. Not because they were intoxicated, but the fact she did something so personal with Mako was so…unbelievable, to say the least.

She sighed and tilted her head back, rolling her shoulders while she did so. She shouldn't be thinking about it. After all, they had made a solid pact to never, ever speak of the incident. Mako was just as embarrassed as she was. When they awoke and got over the loud yells of shock and put their clothes back on, they tried to reassess the situation. When they came to the conclusion that they were obviously drunk from a night out celebrating a victory for the Fire Ferrets, and then obliged each other in a heated make out session which magically led them to his bed in the attic, well their faces turned redder than Mako's discarded scarf on the floor.

They feverishly agreed to pretend the fiasco had never happened. They were drunk and not aware of what they were doing. It wasn't planned, so it didn't mean anything. Of course they both knew that they still lost their virginities, but they decided to leave this out of the conversation. The two benders came to the conclusion it would be best not to speak of it and to just move on as if it had never happened.

Korra looked down at the soap-covered plate in her hand. She tried to marvel at the rainbow colors reflecting in the bubbles, but she couldn't rip her mind far away enough from her thoughts. She looked up out the window to see Republic City looming across the bay.

The waterbender supposed their agreement worked. They really did act as if nothing happened. And she and Mako were still the best of friends. If anything they were closer for it; they had a secret together. Of course, it was a secret that went unspoken between them, but it was still a secret nonetheless.

Her eyes fixed on the arena. "I wonder what those guys are doing today," She wondered aloud. More than likely they were training for the probending match next week. If they weren't doing that Bolin was probably just out about the town, eating or wooing his fan girls, and Mako was probably either working at the factory or out with Asami.

Korra wished she could hang out with them today; particularly Asami. They had gotten a lot closer once Korra was able to put her jealousy aside. As it turns out they had a lot in common. The only thing Korra couldn't relate to with the beautiful woman was her interest in clothing- or anything girly for that matter. They were able to bond on just about every other level, though. But Korra avoided the topic of Mako, at least for the past two months. Guilt had coiled in the pit of her stomach since she slept with Mako. Even if it was an accident, the scorpion snake in her gut would relentlessly strike at her and make her feel bad. If Mako and Asami hadn't been dating then she wouldn't have felt bad in the slightest. But she and the firebender wound up disregarding his relationship with Asami Sato, and in the long run just disrespecting nonbender entirely.

Korra placed the clean dishes in the cupboard and dried her hands. Like Mako had said, it never happened, right? It wasn't like they wanted to hurt anyone or anything. It was a fluke; a total mishap. If Mako could move away from it, then so could she.

Her train of thought was interrupted when an awful retching noise erupted from down the hall. Korra allowed her head to drop for a moment, knowing all too well what was coming next.

"Koorrrraaa." It was hard to tell which child it was, but it sounded like Jinora.

Flu season. And all of the airbender kids had it. And who was graced with the responsibility of tending to their every need? She was. Pema couldn't afford to get sick, especially since she was taking care of the newborn. So Korra had spent the last few days holding back hair, cleaning bed sheets, and making medicine runs. But Korra thanked the spirits she didn't have to cook; Pema could do that much.

Another sickening noise came from down the hall. This time Ikki called her name.

"Coming," Korra sighed and trudged across the kitchen.

Like the days before, this one would be just as long and tiring.

\--

"So are the kids getting any better?" Asami asked as she looked up from her magazine on Korra's bed. She had decided to stop by and visit her dear friend after not seeing her for a few days.

They sat in Korra's room nonchalantly looking through some magazines Asami had brought. The green-eyed teen was perched on Korra's bed while Korra herself had decided to take the floor. Naga laid in front of her on her back as the waterbender ran a brush through her thick fur.

"Yes, thank spirits." Korra smiled. The only one who threw up that morning was Meelo, which meant she had less cleaning to do and less contact with vomit.

"I'm glad." Asami smiled. "It just doesn't feel right when I come over and none of them run up to greet me."

"They definitely like visitors." Korra turned around to face Asami and looked at the magazine in her hand. "Since when did you guys start publishing Satomobile magazines?"

"Just last week." Asami grinned as she turned the page. "We decided it would be a good idea, since we just recently released a new model." She turned to a page where a sleek red vehicle was displayed on a race track.

"Oh! I think I heard Mako talking about it at practice the other day." Korra mentally cringed for mentioning the firebender's name, but decided not to make a big deal about it. It wasn't as if he was a big part of the conversation anyway- if she just kept talking then maybe it could stay that way. "Something about how it's the fastest Satomobile yet or something?"

"That's right!" Asami enthused. "I got to test drive a lot of them. I've never driven anything that went that fast before." She turned the page and landed on an add page displaying a popular line of makeup. The nonbender went on and on about how amazing the new model was before she noticed the concealer tones displayed on the page. There were many colors from olive skin to absolutely ghostly pale, as well as water tribe skin tones. She looked at the dot containing Korra's usual color and frowned.

"Yeah, but I bet you still wiped the track with all of the other test drivers!" Korra grinned with confidence.

"Korra, are you feeling okay?" Asami's eyebrows knitted together in worry.

"Huh?" Korra said. "Yeah, I'm fine. Why?"

Asami's eyes drifted back to the color on the page and then to Korra's face. "You look pale." Her normal color was a little bit darker and livelier, but the Korra she was looking at now looked a little drained.

"I do?" She quirked an eyebrow.

"Yeah." Asami closed the magazine and gave her full attention to her friend. "Do you think you might be getting what the kids had?"

Korra turned around with a smirk and started brushing Naga again. "I think if I would have gotten sick it would have happened already. Besides, I'm feeling fine!" She paused for a moment and thought, "I mean, I've been a little tired lately, but I think that's because I've been up all hours of the night taking care of sick kids, but besides that I feel great!" Actually, she neglected to mention she felt a little bit nauseous, but she figured that was because she hadn't eaten all day and due to her lack of sleep. There was no need to worry her friend, especially since Asami could convey her condition to Mako, who would probably tell her to stay home from practice. Korra didn't want that. She had already been stuck on the island for days without any interaction from Republic City- she needed practice to stay sane.

A little part of her also said it was because she wanted to see Mako and Bolin; particularly Mako. And feeling a little pushed out by what probably wasn't an illness wasn't in her agenda.

"I hope you're right." Asami leaned over and scratched Naga's chin.

Korra hoped she was right too.

\--

Her nausea was in full swing by the time she woke up for practice a few days later. Korra cupped her hands over her face as she tried to get her bearings before getting up to face the day. She drew in a deep breath to quell the violence in her stomach and pushed herself onto her feet.

The minute her feet hit the floor, however, the contents in her stomach catapulted up her throat. She bolted to the bathroom across the hall and, with wild abandonment, threw up. As she waited out the aftershock, she rested her head against the wall and closed her eyes, taking slow, shaky breaths. The avatar didn't need this. She had so much she needed to do—so much she wanted to do. She had training with the boys in an hour and after that she had airbending training, which would last until the evening. Not to mention Tenzin gave her fair warning that Tarrlok was considering another infiltration upon an Equalist training facility.

The young woman ran her hands over her eyes and grunted. "I can't get sick now..." She hoisted herself up off of the bathroom floor and went about her morning as if it never happened. But by the time she was going to make her swim across the bay she felt the nausea come back. Not feeling up to the journey she called Naga to swim her across.

Normally Korra found the sea water calming—it was the embodiment of her birth element. Wherever there was a form of water, she could always feel at home. But today the water was mocking her. Watching the waves move in a rhythmic pattern and Naga moving underneath her only jostled the nonexistent contents in her stomach around more. Korra clenched her eyes tight and gripped Naga's fur between her fingers. The polar bear dog seemed to sense her owner's discomfort and tried to swim faster to shore. As soon as they surfaced, Korra turned around to upchuck into the ocean.

She placed her hand on her head and sat up. She looked around to see if anyone had seen the almighty avatar release a technicolored yawn, but she found herself alone. She looked up at Naga when the large hybrid whined with concerned. "I'm fine, girl." She held a hand up to put the polar bear dog's mind at ease. "Just the flu, it'll pass."

As she and Naga walked up the arena steps, Korra felt queasy again. She leaned into Naga before entering the building. Naga's small eyes brimmed with worry.

"I'll be fine!" Korra reassured, trying to stand up straight. "See?" she said as she steadied herself. "Now wait out here. I'll be back in a couple of hours." She bid her companion farewell and made her way to the locker rooms.

Her nauseated state never improved while she dressed for practice. She tried taking in deep breaths and taking small sips of water from the sink, but found little relief. She figured training with the brothers would take her mind off of it and make her feel better. Surely part of it was just her worrying too much; if she could just get her mind off of the problem, then maybe the bug would just skedaddle and she would be good as new.

She gave herself an unimpressed look in the mirror after that thought. Worry? Yeah right. This was a full on bug and it wasn't going to go away if she just didn't think about it. But she had to push through it. She had the boys counting on her for the match in a few days. She couldn't just call in sick- they needed to win as many matches as possible to make a good impression for sponsors. And sponsors meant more money and a better chance at the championship.

She took a deep breath, immediately regretting how it settled on her stomach and started for the gym.

"Hey, Korra!" Bolin chimed as he tossed the training ball to his brother.

"Hey," she called out tiredly with a smile. She was always glad to see Bolin, but she would be lying if she said his loud voice didn't make her feel even sicker. She wanted quiet- and now that she thought about it, she probably wasn't going to get any during practice.

She let her gaze slip to Mako, who held the ball as if he were ready to throw. His eyes were locked on her in an examining way. "You don't look so good."

"Thanks," Korra grumbled. "That's what every girl wants to hear in the morning." It seemed the closer she got to them the more they expressed their concerns.

"That's not what I meant." Mako rolled his eyes. "You look sick."

"Yeah." Bolin leaned towards her a bit. "You look kinda green."

"More like pale," Mako added.

"I'm fine." She had a feeling she was going to get tired of saying that.

"You don't look fine," the firebender said. "Maybe you should sit this practice out."

"What?! No!" Korra shook her head- another bad decision on her part. The room spun for a brief moment. "The match is in a few days. And I'm your only waterbender!"

"Exactly." Mako placed the ball against his side. "As our only waterbender you need to be in shape for the match, not green around the gills."

"You just said she looked pale a second ago!" Bolin gave his brother a look. Mako sighed in response, but before he could say anything, Korra nabbed the training ball from his side and started for the center of the gym. "Listen you guys, I appreciate the concern, but really, I'm okay." She gave them a smile, but it didn't seem to convince them otherwise. "Come on, let's get to work."

Both brothers hung their heads and decided to go along with the strong-headed girl's decision. They threw the ball between each other for another ten minutes before Korra abruptly threw the ball back to Bolin and then darted out of the room.

"Where is she going?" Mako asked.

Bolin cringed when he heard the sounds of vomiting down the hall. "I think she went to go throw up."

Mako sighed and stood by his brother's side. "She really shouldn't be here." He put his hands on his hips. "She's going to make herself worse and she might get us sick too."

"Yeeeaahhhh but if you try telling her that she'll just go from pale to green to red in the face." Bolin grinned stupidly at his older brother.

Mako rolled his eyes. At least his brother knew how to make a situation lighter; something Mako was always grateful for even if he didn't act like it. "We'll drag her back home if we have to."

"Drag who back home?"

The brothers looked up to see Asami at the doorway. She immediately made a bee line to Mako and wrapped her arms around him. He wrapped his arm around her waist and drew her closer to him. "It's Korra," he answered simply. "She's sick and she probably won't go home."

"Oh no," Asami bleated. "I had a bad feeling she might get sick when I saw her the other day." She looked around the gym. "Where is she now?"

"Tossing her cookies in the bathroom." Bolin sat down on one of the training benches.

"I'll go check on her." Asami gingerly let go of Mako and sauntered out of the gym.

"Thanks, Asami," Mako called after her, meaning every word of his gratitude. Maybe if he was lucky his girlfriend could talk his teammate into going home early. Whenever Mako tried to convince Korra to do anything he was boldly denied. But it seemed to just be him though. She did give Bolin a hard time every now and again, but she was still lighthearted around the earthbender. Maybe she was slowly falling for his younger brother after all.

The idea sent an unexpected pain through his chest; something he had grown to ignore. He was with Asami. And even though he and Korra had one night together, it didn't amount to anything. And if it didn't mean anything then it was obviously an indication that they weren't meant to be. Aside from the guilt he felt, he still felt attracted to Asami- so she was the right choice. So why did he still find himself drawn to his waterbending teammate?

He sighed and turned out to find his brother staring at him. "What?" Mako huffed.

"I don't know," Bolin answered. The earthbender looked down to the ground, hoping his brother wouldn't ask any further. But at the same time he wished he would.

"What is it, Bo?" Mako asked more sternly. He could get anything out of his little brother if he used that tone.

"It's just…" Bo looked at the netting across the room. "Are you sure you made the right choice?" He looked back up at his brother with sad eyes.

"What?" It was more of a statement; it only took him a split second to figure out what his brother was insinuating. "Of-of course! I mean, I'm happy." Mako had a brief moment where even he doubted himself. "And besides," he tilted his chin up, "I thought you liked Korra." It was something else that bothered him. He slept with the girl his brother adored.

"Well, I mean, sure. But-"

"But nothing." Mako put his hands on his hips and looked to the wall with pseudo-confidence. "We're both happy." He didn't want to hear anymore. He would close his ears if he had to. He didn't want anyone questioning his happiness.

Not even himself.

\--

Korra leaned against the bathroom wall and slowly slid down to a sitting position. She groaned and rubbed her eyes, trying to regain focus. Instead she felt like everything was being seen through a distorted, blurry lens. She was able to blink away some of the fog, but only enough to see reflection in the polished bathroom door.

"They were right. I look awful," she mumbled before closing her eyes. She tried focusing on taking slow, deep breaths. For the moment it helped keep her stomach acid down.

Korra opened her eyes when she heard heels clopping around the corner. She turned her head just in time to see Asami Sato at the door.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"What's your definition of okay?" Korra asked dryly. "Because if it means I can stay and practice, then yeah, I'm super." She brought one knee up to her chest and rested an extended arm on it.

"Then you're the opposite of super." Asami walked over to the bathroom sink and wet a paper towel. She gave it to the waterbender, who took it without complaint. Asami took a moment to examine her friend as she wiped her face of sweat. She was several shades paler and looked just a little thin. Her usually vibrant, ice-blue eyes were dull and looked like they were covered in a haze.

"You really don't look good," she commented as Korra rested the paper towel over her mouth.

"You're not the first to tell me that." Korra brought the wet paper to her forehead where she let it stick to her skin.

"You need to go home."

"You're not the first to tell me that, either." She closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the tiled wall again.

"And you're not going to go home, are you?"

"Not the first time I've said that, either." Korra allowed a weak smile to grace her lips. "I have to stay here. I have to practice."

"Korra, it's not that big of a deal," Asami sighed. "I mean, it won't kill the Fire Ferrets to forfeit a match." She tried to offer her friend an encouraging smile. "And maybe they can just get it rescheduled instead of having to forfeit."

"Yeah, but Mako and Bolin can't afford to reschedule the money in their pockets." Korra brought her forehead to a rest against her knuckles, the wet towel falling into her lap. The brothers relied on probending to keep them fed and housed. Mako's job at the factory was to put extra cash in their pockets and also helped pay any probending fees. But if they missed a match, then Mako would have to work twice as hard to make ends meet.

It saddened her even more to think that Asami could help them out when they were in financial trouble, and all Korra could do was sit and watch. She would be the reason they would lose, if not totally forfeit. She had to keep playing to help, to feel relevant. And to keep her own sanity.

Korra couldn't help but look at Asami from the corner of her eye. The woman was gorgeous in comparison to her. She had such flawless light skin and bright green eyes. Her makeup only brought out the shine in her eyes and accentuated her wavy, flowing locks of hair. She was tall; her legs long and lithe. She had all the curves in the right places and knew exactly what to wear to show off what she had. In appearances, Korra felt like she was beat.

"It's no wonder Mako likes her so much." Her heart twinged and she could feel disappointment lodging into her heart. She wanted to hit her head against the wall and scream at herself. She thought she was getting over him. But she wasn't.

It made her stomach lurch to think Mako had probably already been intimate with the dashing beauty in the room with her. It made her even sicker to think Korra had slept with him, knowing he had already probably felt Asami in the same way. It nearly made her vomit to think she had betrayed said beauty's trust. And she hated to admit it, but it made her heart cringe whenever she saw them together. Some days it didn't hurt much. Other days it was almost suffocating.

Today was one of those days. "Asami? Korra?" Both women whipped their heads around when they heard Mako's voice outside of the door. "Is everything okay in there? You've been gone a while." Korra dropped her head and looked at the floor.

"Everything's fine, sweetie!" Asami called back before turning back to Korra. Asami was about to continue pressing her friend to go home, but instead she noticed how Korra had covered her mouth. "Are you about to get sick again?"

"I think I'm gonna go home." Korra abruptly stood up and grabbed her duffle bag. She would change at home. Right now, she just wanted out of the vicinity. She didn't want to talk to anyone. But most of all she didn't want to see Mako. Today was one of those days she just couldn't deal with him; where it hurt too much. She hated the feeling. She hated how she could knock Equalist skulls together, but she couldn't be strong enough to put up with one person just because of how he made her feel.

Ignoring her nausea and her spinning world, Korra pushed her way past Asami and then out the door past Mako. She didn't even give Mako the time of day to speak; the avatar was out the door before he could even breathe. She passed Bolin without even a parting word and was out the Arena door and on Naga in just a few minutes.

She wasn't expected home for a few hours, so Korra snuck in and scurried to her room before anyone could see. She lay down on her bed and released a shaky sigh; her nausea was starting to die down. Unfortunately her jumbled mind was only just beginning to tie itself into tight knots.

"I thought I was over this…" She turned onto her side and stared blankly at the wall. Her stomach gurgled at the thought of Asami clinging to Mako and it churned at the thought of Mako's arm around Asami's waist. "I have so many other things to worry about." Korra closed her eyes. There was airbending; the entire reason why she had come to Republic City in the first place. There was Tarrlok who kept clawing at her leg to rejoin his task force. There was, of course, the problem behind it all- Amon. And then there was Republic City in general, which was in major need of help involving equality and understanding. Korra had to remind herself to take deep breaths. "So why am I still getting upset over him?" Furrowing her brows she temporarily wiped her mind. Her stomach only barely responded to her change of mind.

There were still a few hours left. Maybe she could sleep off the rest of her nausea, as well as her worries.


	2. So Long Rabaroo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Congratulations, Avatar Korra!" the doctor chirped; her eyes a little brighter than they were before. "It looks like you've killed the rabbaroo!"

"No." Tenzin leaned forward at his desk. "No. No-no." He stroked his beard out of habit and shifted to his side a bit. "I'm afraid she's too sick for that." Tenzin stared at his wooden desk as Tarrlok kept jabbering nonsense on the other side of the line. The airbender pulled the phone away from his ear for a moment to let out an audible sigh. "The flu," Tenzin answered back. "It's running longer than expected. She'll be seeing a doctor." The older man tried his best to bite back a piece of his mind. "Today sometime." Not like it was any of Tarrlok's business when the Avatar was going to be visited by a practitioner. "I'm afraid you'll have to do without her until she gets better. And even then she still won't agree to rejoin." After a few more moments of Tarrlok's smooth talk, Tenzin ended the conversation with, "Well good luck to you then," and hung up.

The airbender sighed loudly and rested his head in his hands. He just didn't understand why Tarrlok couldn't move on from Korra and pester someone else. Then again, there was no other jewel which shimmered more brightly than the Avatar. If Tarrlok wanted to make an impression, having a pretty gem like Korra in his crown would certainly do it.

He rested his bearded chin on his folded hands and stared off into space; he wondered how Korra's appointment would go.

\--

Korra looked down at the cup in the doctor's hand and then back up at her. "…Do I have to?"

"Yes," the doctor snapped quietly. "You have to." She shook the cup until Korra sighed in defeat and took it from her. "I guess it can't be helped." Korra shrugged hopelessly and disappeared down the hall for a few minutes. The Avatar returned and handed the cup to the doctor and crossed her arms. "You know, you really should give fair warning before telling someone to do that." She pointed a finger at her accusingly. "You're lucky I hadn't gone to the bathroom before you got here!"

The doctor turned around and set the closed cup on the counter. She quickly wrote Korra's name on it before turning back to face her. "Sorry, Miss Avatar, but I didn't foresee asking for you to fill a cup for me today." She placed the container in her bag and started for the door. "It will be a few days before you'll get the test results back. In the meantime, please call me if you experience any further complications."

"Will do, Doc!" Korra waved her out with a cocky smile.

"That's Dr. Tai to you!" The middle-aged woman wagged her finger at the waterbender before closing the door behind her.

Korra sighed and hefted herself up onto the examining table. She clasped her hands in her lap and looked around trying to shake the awkwardness of the appointment from her mind. The doctor was a bit abrasive, not to mention bitter; more than likely one of Korra's many fans. The entire session was filled with blunt questions from Dr. Tai and stumbling answers from Korra. Eventually, Dr. Tai agreed that Korra was probably suffering from a long-term flu, but just to be on the safe side she wanted to take a urine test from her.

Korra rolled her shoulders and neck, while leaning back on her arms. She had to say, she felt pretty good at the moment. Her nausea had left the minute doctor had walked out the door; she supposed it was due to nerves. Doctors never were her favorite people. The most Korra had to complain about was some fatigue, and a little bit of dizziness, but she contributed that to her constant vomiting, nutrition, and lack of sleep. She would be right as rain soon enough.

She had to admit though, being sick was putting her in a bitter mood. The Fire Ferrets had to forfeit their last match since their waterbender was out of commission. Tenzin wouldn't let her train or do anything other than lay in bed all day. The only thing that kept her sane through the day was visits from her friends, the airbending kids, and reading. And Korra didn't like reading much; she was desperate.

But perhaps her illness was coming to an end and she would be able to put her nose to the grindstone.

\--

The next day Korra lay in bed reading a probending magazine. She hadn't seen the brothers much lately, so the magazine was the only window she had to the probending world. She didn't even know who was at the top of their game anymore. Asami had offered her Satomobile magazines and even some cosmetic ones, but Korra adamantly refused. She'd rather have Jinora come in and have her read one of her historical sagas to her.

It was around dinner time when Korra was slowly running her eyes across the page of an airbending book and trying to keep focused. She had griped to Tenzin about being bedridden and getting nothing done for so long that eventually he thumped a book on her bedside table and told her to study. It would be a crime to say she didn't enjoy the fact that she was learning. But it would be an even bigger crime to say it was boring her to tears. In fact she was even a little thankful when she heard voices down the hall coming closer to her room. But once she realized who was talking she cringed and sat up in bed, preparing herself for the onslaught of pretty words and bribery.

Councilman Tarrlok entered the room without even knocking. He immediately greeted the Avatar like a polar bear dog that hadn't seen its owner in ages. "Avatar Korra!" He walked closer to her bed, but stopped short. "So good to see you! How are you feeling?"

"Oh, pretty good until you showed up." Korra smirked, however she quickly crossed her arms over her chest and frowned. "What do you want, Tarrlok?" Korra looked over her fellow water tribe member's shoulder to see Tenzin was in the doorway. There was no way her airbending teacher was going to leave her alone with this cretin, and for that she was grateful.

"Who says I want anything from you?" Tarrlok shrugged his shoulders, giving her a pseudo grin. "I just wanted to know how the Avatar was feeling. You've been sick for over a week now!" The grin he wore seemed to stretch sickeningly. "I hope you have a speedy recovery and rejoin my task force soon!"

"Keep dreamin', bub," Korra scoffed. "I'm not letting you use me."

"What a shame." The councilman gave the teenager a half-lidded stare. He was rather unimpressed with her steadfast decision to defy him. "But I'm sure you'll change your mind once you start to feel better; bugs often affect the mind!" He closed his eyes and smiled before changing the subject. "Speaking of which, what seems to be making you so ill?" He already knew the answer, but he wanted to know to what extent she was sick and when to expect her to be fully recovered.

"The flu," Korra answered bluntly. "I get nauseous on and off throughout the day. Now can you please leave?" She glowered. "I sense a puke in my near future." She decided to leave out the fatigue, body aches, and dizziness. Her health wasn't any of Tarrlok's business.

Tarrlok's brow furrowed slightly. "Well, that sounds rather unpleasant." He turned for the door, still keeping his eyes on the young woman. Something seemed off. "Get well soon, Avatar Korra." He smiled that sly smile; his grey eyes glittering menacingly under the light of her room. "The city needs you." Tarrlok kept his eyes on her a little longer before nodded a farewell to Tenzin and exiting the room.

"I don't know what his deal is," Korra grumbled.

Tenzin shook his head. There was no use in trying to explain Tarrlok's motives anymore. "I tried to tell him over the phone that you were ill and not taking visitors."

Korra scowled and flopped back on her bed. She brought her pillow over her face. "Now I feel sick again."

"Go ahead and get some rest," Tenzin said as he started to exit the room. "I'll make certain he doesn't make another appearance like that again." With that the airbender closed the door behind him and left Korra to her upset stomach.

Korra groaned and curled into a fetal position underneath her blanket. The Avatar brought her hand to her stomach to try and quell the unsettling stir of her dinner. Taking deep breaths, Korra managed to clear her mind of the stress that had coiled in her stomach. She stretched out on her bed, taking in the cool air around her.

The last thing she ever needed in her life was Tarrlok slithering in on his belly like a fish snake and trying to talk her into doing his bidding. While she still didn't understand what went on in that man's mind, she was growing used to his suave begging and was coming to accept it as a part of her life in Republic City. Maybe he would get the picture and back off someday. Regardless, Korra had more important things to worry about, like getting better.

\--

Visiting the Air Temple clinic was, like before, a grueling task. Korra hated the antsy feeling she got whenever she was in a doctor's office, especially when she was awaiting a verdict. She wanted to know what was ailing her so she could get medication for it and recover. Waiting out what they assumed was the flu wasn't really cutting it for her.

The Avatar tried to distract herself by looking around the sparse room. Wooden floors in pristine condition surrounded by bleached counters counter tops, and in the middle of all of the clean smells and medicines was the table she was perched on; swinging her legs like a bored child. She tried to ask herself silly questions to preoccupy her mind; how long a doctor had to attempt school, how they kept the room so spotless, and how they had constructed the room. The entertaining questions went on until the door slid open and Dr. Tai came whirling in.

"How are you doing today, Avatar Korra?" the doctor asked as she shut the door behind her and swung her satchel onto the counter.

"Okay I guess." Korra shrugged with a smile. "I'm about the same as I was a few days ago." She paused. "I get sick on and off every day."

"Hmm." The doctor smiled. "That sounds about right."

Korra raised an eyebrow and took note of the doctor's posture and face. Dr. Tai seemed very…aloof, and possibly even a bit relaxed. Her lips were turned upward in a knowing smile. Whatever was under the doctor's skin, Korra hoped it would stay there until after her appointment.

"So what do you know, Doc?" Korra leaned forward with a smirk. Obviously the doctor knew something interesting Korra didn't. "Do I have some other kind of bug?" Korra asked. "Because I'm really tired of losing my lunch."

"Unfortunately you're just going to have to get used to it." Dr. Tai pulled out a manila folder and began undoing the tabs.

Korra's heart sunk. "Oh no…do I have something permanent?" She didn't know how she would cope with something reoccurring; how was she supposed to protect the world if she was puking every hour?

"Oh no, this isn't permanent." The practitioner pulled out a few pieces of printed paper. "Though the aftermath certainly is a long term commitment."

"Uhhh…" Korra smiled nervously and looked around the room. "I don't understand." She hoped the answer wasn't painfully obvious; Dr. Tai didn't seem like the kind of person who enjoyed having to explain simple details.

"Congratulations, Avatar Korra!" the doctor chirped; her eyes a little brighter than they were before. "It looks like you've killed the rabbaroo!"

The Avatar blanked for a moment before continuing with an uneasy smile. "I…don't understand." Korra quirked a brow. "There aren't any of those around here." As far as she knew, rabbaroos were only native to the Earth Kingdom.

"Let me put it in simpler terms." The doctor smirked as she tapped her stack of papers on the clinic counter. "You're pregnant."

If she had had water in her mouth, Korra would have done a spit take. Her mind blanked for a moment before it kicked back up, a smile danced around on her face and the humor shimmered in her eyes. She started to chuckle as she pointed a finger at the doctor and raised a brow, putting her other hand on her hip. "Good one, Doc!" When she saw the doctor looking at her like she was crazy, Korra smothered her laughter. "Okay, seriously, what's wrong with me?" The longer the doctor just stared at her, the more her heart raced and the more her mind erased itself.

"I'm quite serious." The doctor's mirth disappeared when she saw Korra's eyes dim and her shoulders slump. She could have sworn she saw the universe implode within the young woman's icy eyes. "You're pregnant."

Korra's breathing became shallow and her eyes no longer focused on the world around her. She felt like her eyes were trying to look into herself to find her mind because it had currently gone missing. The only words she could seem to find were 'pregnant' and 'you're'. But surely those couldn't be in the same sentence. Her, pregnant? No, that just wasn't possible. Her eyes continued to search for her lost mind, but all it could find were traces of information it had scattered in its wake. 'Baby', 'pregnant', 'expecting', and flurry of other words suddenly bombarded her, and the anxiety which usually remained dormant within her dug its way through her mental ground and began eating at her grip on the world.

"N-no. That's not possible." Her eyes managed to come back and meet the doctor's.

"It is." The doctor could see the frantic look in the avatar's eyes. She would try to be patient and calm with her. "Tell me, Avatar Korra," the doctor began as she walked over to the table and leaned on it. Perhaps being casual would help ease the young woman. "Have you been sexually active recently?"

Once again, she had to look into herself for the answers. She could see her mind shivered in the corner of her head. She coaxed it for answers. "N-no," she said. "Well…" She couldn't lie to the doctor. "How recent does it have to be?"

"Judging by the evaluation, you must be around two months, give or take." She paused. "So, were you sexually active then?"

Korra leaned forward, resting her head in her hand. She had to try and get a grip on the world. "It was…it was just once. I don't…"

"It only takes once."

Korra could feel her world slipping. She was trying to keep a firm hold of it, but it was spinning out of control and suddenly it was becoming too much. While her world was running rampant, it was weighing heavily on her shoulders and she could feel herself becoming overwhelmed.

The doctor put her hand on Korra's shoulder. "Is there anything I can do for you right now?"

Her mind and world were whirling out of control; she was helpless and couldn't get either to calm down. "…Go get Pema," she nearly whimpered. She brought the hand holding her head to her eyes. Once the doctor left the room she shook her head and tried to bite back the sudden onset of tears.

"This can't be happening," she said bitterly. "This can't happen. Not to me." She had heard about girls getting knocked up, but she had never seen herself as a candidate for such a thing. That was something so far out of her reckoning. She never thought it could happen to her. She was the Avatar. She still had to master airbending. She still had to take down Amon. She still had to put Republic City back together. If she was lucky she might even find a nice guy and get married- but once again such things seemed out of her reach at this point. But here she was; pregnant, with none of these things accomplished. She hadn't even begun to date anyone.

Panic was curling at the pit of her stomach and her throat clogged with emotion. Her heart was racing so much it almost hurt and bile was beginning to rise.

She must have sat in a state of taut nerves for several more minutes before Pema quietly squeezed into the room and shut the door behind her. When she saw Korra frozen in her spot, not even looking up to greet her, the older woman knew something was wrong. "Korra?" The waterbender still didn't respond. Pema walked up to her and leaned down to her level. "Korra, sweetie what's wrong?"

Korra still kept her hand over her eyes. She slowly shook her head as she spoke. "I-I don't understand… It was only one time, Pema. One time…" She bit her lip and cursed herself; weakness wasn't allowed. But at this point it was all she could feel.

"What was only one time?" Her voice was soft and sweet. She gently brushed a loose strand of hair out of the avatar's face, remaining patient all while Korra tried to gather her fleeing thoughts.

The young woman began shaking, and from there she knew there was no turning back. "…I'm pregnant." She squeezed her temples to fight the tears and from biting her lip again, but it didn't work. She shook her head again when she felt Pema's hand freeze. She blinked and the tears fell. She deeply chastised herself and gritted her teeth, taking in a sharp breath. She brought her other hand to her face, determined not to let a soul see her eyes.

"Oh, Korra…" Pema's voice remained soothing, but Korra could hear the shock, and she knew the disappointment must have been there as well. More tears fell at this realization and a heart wrenching sob escaped her throat. She didn't want to hear it. She couldn't take more people expressing their disappointment in her. The entire city was already upset with her. They expected her to handle the universe. They expected an eighteen-year old girl to save everyone.

She was eighteen and she was having a baby. The thought brought more tears of anguish to her eyes. "Pema, what do I do?!" Her voice was thick and she tried to swallow a sob. "I can't handle a baby right now!"

The older woman's eyes jostled over Korra's body. The teenager was absolutely devastated and her entire being showed it. Even though Pema's fingers were barely ghosting her hair she could still feel the vibrations from Korra's shaking. Tears were running down her face faster than a runaway train and her slouched position was disheartening.

Now was no time for 'What were you thinking?' or 'You're the Avatar!' Right now Korra was a frightened teenage girl who needed support. Besides, Pema knew very well Korra was already beating herself up for this mishap; it was in her nature. The last thing Korra would need was negative feedback. She was sure the young Avatar was going to face enough of that in the near future, but for now she had Pema, and Pema wasn't going to bring her down.

Pema leaned forward and wrapped her arms around the crying teenager. Korra gripped the sleeve of Pema's air acolyte clothes and buried her face in her shoulder. The nonbender wished she knew what to say to her. But she wondered if it would help her right then. She probably wouldn't listen to everything she said. More than likely, Korra wanted to get things done. She would rather figure out a way to make things work again, rather than sit around and talk about feelings. Maybe one of the best ways to comfort her right now was to get facts straight and take action. But before they could do that she needed answers. "Can I ask who the father is?"

Pema felt Korra's body tighten in response. "…I already know, don't I?" Korra nodded into Pema's shoulder.

"It was an accident; we were drunk," Korra said while holding back a sob.

"Shh." Pema stroked her hair. "It's okay, Korra."

"It is NOT okay." Korra pulled back to look at the older woman with a furrowed brow. She soon regretted making eye contact with her. Pema wasn't giving her any kind of look, but one of concern, but Korra could feel the embarrassment and shame coursing through her veins. She wanted to crawl under a rock and never walk in the day light ever again.

Korra looked down. "I'm the Avatar. I have too many people counting on me and too many people already think I'm a failure. And now…this happens!" The tears started to build again; she covered her eyes. "I can't do anything right."

"That's not true," Pema said firmly. "It all depends on how you look at it."

"Well I don't know how else to look at it, Pema!" Korra raised her voice, but reigned herself back. Pema didn't deserve her fury. "Sorry," she said shortly, trying to fight off the new headache eating her.

"It's fine." She saw Korra was about to protest, but Pema stopped her. "Listen to me." She watched as Korra closed her eyes and released a deep breath. Tenzin's teachings on patience and anger management were working wonders for this girl. "I may not always be good with words, but I can tell you this: You. Are not. A failure." She put emphasis on each word, hoping it would somehow resonate with Korra. "Never ever let yourself believe you're a failure." Pema paused and took a breath. "Next, you're only eighteen."

Korra waited for the chiding to begin, but instead Pema continued, "I think the rest of the world fails to realize that no matter how much training you go through or what kind of status you hold, you're still just a teenager. You can't handle the world on your own- no one can. It's just impossible!" She reached forward and placed a tender hand on Korra's shoulder. "But that's what you have us for."

"Then how am I supposed to handle a baby when I can't even handle the world, Pema?" Korra bleated weakly as tears welled in her eyes again.

"Like I said, you have us to help you figure that out." Pema turned around and reached for a wooden chair not too far from the examining table. She took a seat and leaned forward, clasping her hands together. "I just need you to be calm for a second. I know that's hard to do right now, but we need to get some things straight first."

Korra nodded and wiped her eyes of saltwater.

"Now, how far along are you?"

"The doctor said two months." Korra took a deep breath. She could feel her mind slowly inching out of its corner; just telling someone made things easier.

"Okay." Pema took a breath. "And I'm guessing Mako has no idea what's going on."

"No. I didn't even know until just now," Korra mumbled and placed her hands in her lap. Mako…she hadn't even thought about his yet. And now that she had, she could feel bile rising in her throat and her stomach clench in a terrible way. She wasn't the only one with too much on their shoulders; Mako had his brother, probending, a job, and Asami- oh Spirits, Asami.

Pema could see the anxiety beginning to take Korra's body again. "Calm down." She tried calling Korra back to reality. "We're taking this a step at a time!" The teenager seemed to reel herself back in enough to look at Pema for her to continue.

"So this is what we've established," Pema started. "First, you're pregnant." Korra wanted to sneer, but she kept it in. Pema was only trying to help her. Surely she had a reason for restating the obvious. "Mako is the father. You're two months in. And you just found out."

Having heard all of this Korra was able to corral the facts into a small pen and size them up. She had vital information to the situation. It was like she had temporarily put everything else out of her mind and was able to briefly focus on these few pieces.

"I think your next best plan of action would be to tell Mako."

And suddenly all of the horse birds jumped the fence and were running around all over the farm land. "No, Pema-"

"Korra, you are NOT taking this on by yourself. He's just as much at fault as you are." Pema furrowed her thin brows and pointed a finger at Korra.

"But Mako already has so much to deal with!" Korra countered. The Fire Ferrets were already starting to fall behind because she had been sick, which meant Mako had to work even more to make sure his and his brother's needs were met. And he was already in a relationship with a perfect girl. The last thing Mako needed, or probably wanted, was a baby- let alone a baby with Korra.

"And so do you. You two are going to have to work together to figure this out."

"But-"

"Korra," Pema said firmly as she crossed her arms. "It's his baby, too—he has the right to know."

"But..." Korra looked down at her lap. She didn't feel pregnant and she certainly didn't look it. It was hard to believe there was a baby growing inside of her…and that it was hers and Mako's. How would he even feel? She had an idea of what would happen; he would probably be angry, worried, or shocked. Of course Korra couldn't blame him; she was already going through all of these feelings as she and Pema conversed. "I don't even know how he's going to react. And I don't even know how to begin telling him."

"I don't know what to tell you about how he's going to react." Pema leaned back in her chair. "As for telling him, you really just need to tell him- preferably when he's alone."

"Yeah…"Korra mumbled.

"But once you do that, then we'll figure out where to go from there." Pema smiled and stood up from her seat. "Are you going to be okay?"

In truth, Korra didn't know. She was still too dumbstruck to hold everything in the palm of her hand. "Yeah," she rasped and nodded against her hand in her hair. She quickly weaved her fingers through dark strands before snapping back up at Pema with pleading eyes. "Please don't tell Tenzin!" If Tenzin found out about this she knew she wouldn't hear the end of it. As caring and patient as Tenzin was, Korra knew a chewing was in store for her; worse than that his words were bound to be the ugliest part of the brunt of disappointment she was sure to face. It wouldn't be ugly because he would say awful things—no, it would be because his opinion mattered more than the rest of the city. He would regurgitated everything she had already beaten herself up over, but it would hurt more coming from him.

"Oh, Spirits, no!" Pema's eyes widened slightly. "Not right now! I want you to talk to Mako first. I'd rather the two of you visit with Tenzin about this together." Pema rested her hand on the door. "I'll be sure and be there when you tell him to talk him back to his senses." The older woman smiled. She knew her husband may very well lose his patience, but she always knew he was a good man and he never meant any harm.

"Thanks, Pema." Korra weakly smiled at the woman as she was about to leave the room. "For everything."

"It's not a problem. Call me if you need anything."

"Okay." Korra was left alone in the clinic room with the remainder of her rampaging thoughts. She was just now starting to get a lasso on most of them and putting them into the corral. But as soon as she took a deep breath and thought about the firebender across the bay her nerves rattled. The corral busted and she started shaking again. Gritting her teeth, Korra took in a sharp breath of air and covered her eyes once again.

"What am I supposed to do?" she asked herself aloud. "I'm not ready for any of this."

Suddenly Tarrlok wasn't the last thing the Avatar needed in her life anymore.


	3. Audacious Accusation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avatar took a deep breath and tried to find her center of balance. She looked up at him through thick eyelashes; her expression one of caution and fear. This was it. “I’m pregnant.”

Never had the arena looked so intimidating. Usually when one looked upon it they were awestruck and filled with excitement. At night it glowed like a heavenly being, while in the day it stood as a golden monument of community. But for the first time Korra had never felt so put off by the building. It seemed as though it were too big and too obnoxiously golden for her eyes to take in. If that wasn’t enough, she couldn’t really hear the all of the buzz around her; she was far too engulfed by the building and what awaited her inside to open her ears.

Korra felt queasy once again, but this time she knew it wasn’t because of the blossoming life inside of her. Her nerves had been a wreck since she found out only yesterday afternoon and they only worsened when she woke up this morning to get dressed. Yesterday she had vowed to herself she would march over to the arena and spill the news to Mako. She didn’t want to put it off and allow fear to entangle itself in her psyche; her rattled mind couldn’t handle all of the anxiety she had been feeling. If she could just get this out of the way, despite the outcome, then she could rid herself of another worry on her list.

Taking a deep breath Korra numbly walked up the arena steps, keeping her eyes on the ground. She hugged herself and her eyes shifted around nervously. Ever since yesterday she had become self-conscious of her appearance. Could people see it? Could people tell she was pregnant? She knew they couldn’t; she was too early for that, but the idea frightened her. Once she found out she could see little things, like how she had gained a little bit of weight and how she could barely tell when she wasn’t wearing the parka. However, the people around her didn’t seem to be giving her any strange looks- at least none stranger than normal; though she could tell a lot of people were curious as to why she was wearing a parka in the middle of summer. She was fully aware she was just paranoid, and hoped the crazy thoughts would go away once she dumped some of her stress.

As the waterbender made her way down the twisting and turning halls of the arena her stomach did flops and her hands tingled. The brothers were sure to be training in the gym as usual, but that only made her more nervous. She really just wanted to tell Mako and get it over with; no playful banter from Bolin, no chiding about missing practice and how she should be in bed, no tactics.

Her stomach nearly shot up her throat when she heard the familiar bursts of fire down the hall and the sound of rock hitting a net. She stopped around the corner from the entrance and brushed her hand over her forehead. This was it; sink or swim- and sinking wasn’t an option. Korra took a deep breath and willed a phony smile. With a little shot of adrenalin, she rounded the corner. “Hey guys!” she called with ease. The little spark of bravery she had fizzled out the minute their eyes landed on her; particularly Mako’s.

“Korra!” Bolin cried.

“You’re back,” Mako stated calmly. “Are you feeling better?”

His concern touched her, but she knew he wouldn’t remember his affection towards her in a short while. She hated how she was going to be the one to bring his world crashing down.

“I’m better.” She could hear the confidence in her voice dropping, “I mean, I’m not contagious anymore.” She glanced off to the side. Nope, she certainly wasn’t contagious. “But Tenzin still wants me to lay off any rough work.” She leaned back against the wall and crossed her arms. She looked down to avoid Mako’s questioning eyes; his eyes wandered over her form, causing her to recoil.

“You do look like you feel better.” Bolin smiled brightly. “Maybe when we’re done with practice we can all go out and get something to eat!”

“That would be great!” She tried to push enthusiasm into her voice but it dulled. She hated how she couldn’t hide her dread. For whatever reason she just couldn’t bring herself to keep a lie plastered on her face for either of them. Either Bolin was oblivious or he was trying to cheer her up by keeping the ball rolling. “So did you just come here to watch then? Or to hang out?”

“Yeah!” She smiled a little. “That would be great, if you don’t mind?”

“Are you kidding? Of course we don’t mind!” Bolin turned to his brother, “Right, Mako?”

“Uh, right.” Mako picked up on Korra’s uneasiness as he quickly glanced her way. He knew something was off, really off. Korra was almost always loud and vibrant, especially in the gym. But today she didn’t seem positive in her actions and words, and her posture wasn’t one which exuded confidence. Mako wondered if Bolin seemed to catch on to their friend’s poor state, but it seemed his brother didn’t notice.

“Come on, bro. Let’s give this lady a show!”

“Right,” Mako mumbled, glancing at Korra one last time.

The brothers continued their practice, Bolin occasionally boasting to get Korra’s attention. Mako would gently grab his attention, knowing Korra didn’t seem to be up for a lot of noise, and directed his brother back to practice.

Korra sat on a bench against the wall and haphazardly watched the brothers. She felt like she was in a haze as she was staring at them, but not watching them. Their movements seemed like an illusion and their bending was a blur. All she could really focus on was what she had in store for Mako after practice. Her stomach knotted at the thought of his many possible reactions and how the news would devastate him just like it had for her.

When they finished practice, Bolin took his helmet, shook the sweat of his hair and jogged over to Korra. “We should all do something together today!” His green eyes shimmered brightly with the prospect of a fun day.

Korra raised an eyebrow, a small smile on her face. “Like what?” She didn’t feel like doing anything. She didn’t even feel like doing what she was going to do in a few moments, but she had no choice in the matter.

“How about we go out to eat?” Bolin put his hands on his hips and looked between his brother and Korra.

“Um…” Mako said, “sure.”

“Yes! Narook’s!” Bolin cheered, pumping his fists in the air. “Authentic water tribe grub here we come!” Bolin practically skipped out of the room.

Korra’s attention immediately fell down to her hands on her lap; she knew it was coming now. The confrontation she had been waiting for was in motion. She glanced up and saw Mako looked at her and slowly making his way towards her. Feeling self-conscious once again she wrapped her arms around her torso.

“Hey, are you okay?” Mako’s eyebrows lifted in concern.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Korra wouldn’t even look him in the eye. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Korra, you’re acting different; you won’t even look at me.” He quirked a brow. “And why are you wearing a coat in the middle of summer?”

Korra quickly stole a glance at her sleeves. “…Because I’m cold?”

“You’re from the South Pole; it’s actually pretty warm in this building. How could you be cold?” Whatever she was hiding it was eating her alive inside.

“I’ve been sick, Mako,” she grumbled. All the courage she had prior to arriving at the arena was gone and now she was getting frustrated with herself. It shouldn’t be this hard; just spill it and it’ll all be over. The longer she tip-toed around it, the more difficult it was going to get.

“Getting sick doesn’t make you act this different.”

“Okay,” Korra huffed. Her thin eyebrows knitted together; irritation with herself boiling over. She stood up and faced him. She boldly held his ochre eyes with her own icy ones and decided to go from there. “I’m not sick.” Her thunder suddenly stopped rolling. It hit her, what was about to come tumbling out of her mouth and into the open for him to hear. “At least…not anymore.”

“So you’re better,” Mako stated, like was following along.

“Well…sort of.” Korra took one of her crossed arms off of her stomach and placed her hand on her other arm. “It’s…a little bit more complicated than that.”

Worry etched onto Mako’s face. “What’s wrong? Is it life threatening? Are you going to be okay?”

Korra huffed a small laugh, “No, I mean…I’m fine…or at least I hope I’ll be.” Just say it. Just tell him.

“So what’s wrong with you?”

Korra stared into his eyes; his compassion was a beautiful thing and something she never took for granted. She was going to miss it dearly, because it was the closest she could ever get to him anymore. What he was going to hear from her was either going to make them or break them, so she kept her eyes on his for a while, trying to remember what this expression looked like.

When she tried to speak, she found her throat clogged. Instead she just stood there with her lips slightly parted and looking at him like a silly frog horse. Looking around the room she tried to shake her fear, but couldn’t smooth it out long enough to talk. When she couldn’t bring herself to speak the truth she sighed dramatically and decided to say just what the doctor had said, “I killed the rabbaroo.” She slumped over.

Her big blue eyes took stock of Mako’s reaction. His eyes were looking all around the room for an explanation. A nervous smile hooked his lips. “Uh, what exactly does that mean?”

Now Korra just felt dumb. Of course he wouldn’t know; she hadn’t even known! But she had thought maybe it was a popular saying around Republic City. If it was, it was probably used among woman and doctors, a teenage boy wouldn’t know what that meant.

The Avatar took a deep breath and tried to find her center of balance. She looked up at him through thick eyelashes; her expression one of caution and fear. This was it. “I’m pregnant.”

It didn’t take long for her words to register in the firebender’s mind. While her mind had gone blank, Mako’s mind was more like a reinforced army base. Nothing got in and took him by surprise. But these words somehow managed to break in and bomb his battalions. "What?"

The shock was evident in his voice, but Korra didn’t feel like reiterating herself. It was hard enough to say the first time. “You heard me.”

His mind began whirling like a tape reel and pictures from the past two months flickered before his eyes. This whole time he didn’t suspect anything. Even when she got sick it didn’t even pass his mind that it could be a repercussion of what they did two months ago. As he looked at her now, his eyes flitting up and down her body. She didn’t look pregnant. He noticed how she was covering her stomach by crossing her arms and wondered if she was showing at all and hiding it. It explained why she was wearing her parka.

How was any of this real? There was just no way this was happening. He couldn’t be a father now; there was too much on the line. More over how was he capable of creating a life? A person like him could never be a father.

“No…” he whispered to himself. “That’s just not possible.”

“I know,” Korra murmured back. “But I went to the doctor and took a test.” She looked down at the scuffed gym floor. “I’m two months.”

The reel in his mind started running faster. There was no way he could get someone pregnant. The idea was so surreal. He was only nineteen; how could he create a life? His mind was going so fast he started letting things tumble out of his mouth. “Who’s the father?!”

Things he didn’t even mean.

Korra looked up, her eyes sparked with a jolt of electricity. “What? Mako, who do you think it is?!” She furrowed her brow. Shock and slow-building anger burned through her. Did he really have the nerve to ask such an audacious question?

“Well, I mean…It can’t be me!” He furrowed his brow in return and looked around the gym floor for answers. He was still a kid himself, there was no way he got someone pregnant- let alone Korra, who also happened to be the Avatar! “That’s just impossible!”

A small passing thought quickly crossed his mind, but left a blazing trail behind it- sending off sparks and catching his heart on fire. He could feel a burning hole where his feelings had been. What if –and he knew better than to think such things- but what if Korra had slept with someone else? What if she had gone out and slept with someone else to try and make him jealous? As far as he knew Korra still liked him, even if she didn’t act like it sometimes.

“Well it is!” Korra snapped back.

“It was only one time!” Mako countered back and matched her volume. A baby was something so far out of his comprehension that it couldn’t possibly be his reality. It had to be someone else- because it was always someone else.

“Well APPARENTLY it only takes one time, Mako!” Korra couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She knew he would be shocked, but him calling her out with said shock as the foundation was completely uncalled for. He was accusing her of sleeping around. His claim was enough to send her heart plummeting through the soles of her feet and straight into the core of the earth where it burned. Did he really think so poorly of her? Did she really come off as some kind of floozy who would go to bed with any man she met? What had their friendship even meant to him if he thought this about her the whole time? She had given him a part of herself –unintentionally, albeit- but still!

“It’s just…this is insane! How can it be mine?” he asked her this, more so in disbelieve of his own abilities, rather than his allegation towards her. His eyes softened and his shoulders slumped.

“I’ve only slept with you, Mako,” Korra rasped. For a moment she thought she was so angry her eyes were burning, but to her horror she was close to tears. She snapped around and headed for the door. She slumped as she stopped and rested her hand on the doorframe. “Pema thought I should tell you before telling Tenzin, since it’s your kid and all.” She swallowed the lump in her throat. “But whatever; if you don’t think it’s yours then I guess you don’t have to deal with it.” She rounded the corner, ignoring whatever he might say to stop her or to convince her he was right. The truth began eating her heart out and leaving it hollow. Her crush, her best friend, and the father of her child just denied everything, taking her dignity away as well. The sickening realization was upon her that she would be raising this child alone.

Mako tried calling out to her when she left, but he found his throat was filled with the dust of rotting words and long forgotten phrases. He had so much more to say; much more in terms of comfort once he saw the hurt in her eyes.

I can’t believe I just said all of that. Anger started to fill his insides; anger at himself, anger at Korra, anger at the situation at hand. But the minute she disappeared the topic she had brought to him in the first place took center stage. Her words echoed in his mind.

“I’m pregnant.”

She was pregnant. As in, she was carrying a child. As in, in a short time she would have a kid to take care of. As in, she would be a mother. As in, he would be a father. If the world hadn’t been spiraling when she told him, it certainly was now.

His fists were still tight at his side and his entire body was a coiled spring when Bolin came prancing back into the gym. “Hey we’re ready to- where’s Korra?”

“She went back home.” Mako’s voice was low and nearly toxic as it crossed his lips. Everything was beginning to settle on his shoulders and he knew it was all his own doing.

“Why?” Bolin asked, with disappointment heavy in his green eyes.

“She started feeling sick again.”

He was starting to feel sick, too.

\--

Korra had gotten sick in Yue Bay the minute she got outside. She didn’t even care who saw anymore; her legs felt like jelly and her nerves were raw. Naga tromped over to her and nudged her with care. Korra cursed herself as she felt tears spill from her eyes while she emptied her stomach. She grunted, trying to bite back another wave of bile. Naga seemed to sense her owner’s distress and sat in the way of any possible onlookers. Even the polar bear dog knew of Korra’s distain for tears.

As soon as Korra was able to catch her breath she hastily wiped the tears from her face. There would be no crying over this. She had gone to the arena completely aware that this could make or break hers and Mako’s friendship. Why, she had even thought she had braced herself for a letdown, but her heart had lied to her.

Whatever; she didn’t need him. If he was going to be like that, then he wasn’t a friend worth having. But what was hurting her the most was all the time they had spent together and the moments they had shared; some of her fondest memories. She couldn’t get those back; more over Mako wasn’t the kind of person she thought he was. It nearly ripped her hear to pieces as his words kept replaying in her clouded mind.

“Who’s the father?”

“Well I mean… it can’t be me!”

“It’s just…this is insane! How can it be mine?!”

She had thought the answers would have been obvious. He would only ask such questions if he didn’t want to take responsibility.

She grabbed Naga’s neck and the great polar bear dog helped her owner off of the ground. Korra closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Fine. Regardless of how Mako felt, at least she got one thing out of the way- one less thing to stress about.

But as she opened her eyes it hit her that without him she was going to have a lot more to stress about than she thought. Korra hugged her animal companion close to her and tried to occupy her mind with the feeling of Naga’s fur against her cheek. “We should get home, girl.”

\--

Mako hadn’t even noticed the sun changing positions in the sky. He had been walking for a long time, but he hadn’t realized just how long until the sun was nearly past the horizon and the moon was already in the sky. The sun was long gone, but Mako wished he could stay gone longer; home was the last place he wanted to be right now.

He had brushed off his lunch plans with Bolin; neither of them were really in the mood after Korra bailed, anyway. Mako had spent a long time in the gym showers, letting the hot water scald him until it got cold. He hoped the next person to use the shower liked ice water. He had wandered the city, hoping he could find some answers in dank alley ways and abandoned buildings. Alas, none of them were able to give forth any kind of helpful advice.

The more he walked the more the facts began to sink in, and the more the facts sank in the more his heart sank as well. He was nineteen and had gotten his friend pregnant. If this wasn’t bad enough, he was already in a committed relationship, not to mention he had a job and probending. He had spent the majority of his life taking care of his brother; how could he take care of a baby too?

A baby took so much time an effort- at least, that’s what his parents had told him sometime after Bolin was born. They cried a lot; it seemed like a few times a day he would turn a corner and see a mother losing her patience with a wailing child. Other times he saw couples fighting while a child stood nearby, crying their eyes out. Of course Mako could recall happier sightings of parents with their children. But he couldn’t help but think he would be part of the other families. And if Korra was his partner in raising a child then he was sure the arguing would never stop.

Still, the firebender loved his friend. She was a great companion and fun to be around. Sometimes he wished they could be more. But having a child with her was outlandish, especially since they weren’t even dating. They had skipped an entire episode in life which could have assisted them otherwise in the project of raising a human being. Just like those couples he saw every day, he and Korra would probably just end up arguing and their kid would probably just cry.

Did Korra even have any experience with kids, besides the airbenders? That wasn’t to say he was pegging all of his concerns on her- he was just as concerned for his own interactions with children. He had never even held a baby. Maybe he held Bo when he was little, but he couldn’t remember it very well.

The most distressing part, at least for the moment, was how he would support a child. His job at the factory, while it had a decent pay, was barely enough to get him and his brother by when probending matches were sour. Assuming he only had to pay rent, buy food and the occasional articles of clothing, that is. If he had to pay for anything else then he would go into debt until they won a match or until he got paid again. He was only working part time, though. Perhaps if he gave up probending then he could work fulltime and make more than enough- at least for him and his brother. But a baby?

Mako sighed and shook his head. Perhaps he was thinking too far ahead- at least for the moment. Aside from knowing he wasn’t ready for a baby, he really didn’t know what else to feel. His stomach was twisted in a maze of different feelings, most of which he couldn’t comprehend.

Then there was Asami; his beautiful, strong, and loyal girlfriend. Spirits, he hated to think of how much this would hurt her. This could end his relationship and end Korra’s friendship with her as well. It was one of the ultimate acts of betrayal and disrespect towards a woman, at least he imagined. No woman, especially Asami, deserved to be put through that kind of emotional turmoil.

He had to admit; their relationship had felt a bit forced lately. It was like he had to think of what to talk to her about and what they could do. He was afraid of her getting bored or sizing him up. Awkward silences were becoming a popular trend among them whenever they were together. He still liked her, but he was beginning to dread their dates. Whatever rough patch they had stumbled into, if that’s what they wanted to call it, it was a difficult one to escape.

Once again, Mako released a heavy sigh. He looked up and saw the sky had gone completely black; illuminated with the ghostly feel of the city’s golden lights. The arena wasn’t far from here and as much as he didn’t want to return to the attic, he knew he should to at least give his little brother some peace of mind. Maybe resting in his home would give him a more comfortable atmosphere to contemplate in.

Upon arriving at the attic Mako was greeted with quiet. It was past twelve and all the lights had been shut off. Bolin must have assumed Mako was just out on the town or with Asami and turned in for the night. For this good fortune Mako was grateful; he wasn’t ready to interact with anyone after all that had happened today. Sitting down was a welcomed indulgence. He had walked the city for so long he hadn’t realized just how his legs throbbed and his back hurt. Releasing a breath of air and closing his eyes to relish in the feeling for a moment, Mako allowed his mind to wander back to what he had been thinking about on the streets.

It was difficult to understand that Korra was pregnant. Maybe it was because she didn’t look it, or because it was so out of the blue. But he should have known; all the signs were there. She had been sicker than a dog, and he seemed to recall her complaining about having to pee a lot and feeling tired. Now that he thought about it, he distinctly remembered her ordering one of the strangest foods on the menu when they went out and ate last. But Korra was strange to begin with, so he had just brushed it off. He wondered why he didn’t catch the signs; if he had maybe he could have expressed his thoughts to her and they could have found out sooner. Maybe he wouldn’t have freaked out the way he did and maybe he his state of mind would be a lot more stable.

But that didn’t really matter anymore, did it? The fact of the matter was that they hadn’t found out earlier—they found out now. What mattered now was figuring out what to do. But that was just the problem; Mako didn’t know what to do. Where should he even start? What should he say? What should he do? There was so much to be done and said he couldn’t place a marker on the starting point.

“Mako?”

Mako looked over his shoulder to see Bolin standing at his bedroom doorway. His green eyes reflected the golden city lights with concern as he rested his strong hand on the doorframe. Mako turned his head away in shame. He didn’t deserve concern at this point, especially not from his little brother, who was deeply infatuated with the girl he had stupidly knocked up.

“You were sure gone for a while,” Bolin commented. “I was starting to get kind of worried.”

Mako didn’t answer. Bolin knew he could sometimes be an oblivious guy, but he was observant enough to know when his brother was deeply upset. Usually Mako would brood and go quiet for a long time before ever saying a word about what was wrong; if he even said what was wrong at all. The best way to get his brother to talk was to keep talking to him.

“You alright, bro?” Bolin didn’t move from his spot. Getting up in Mako’s personal space when something was bothering him was usually a bad idea. But when Mako didn’t answer, didn’t even move, Bolin took the opportunity to talk again. “You look like someone who just got their sand castle kicked down.”

Still nothing.

“You haven’t been this down since…” He could think of a lot of times Mako had been depressed. But none of them seemed to compare to whatever his brother was going through now. “You’re…not gonna tell me what’s wrong, are you? Figures, I couldn’t even get Korra to crack a smile today.” He frowned. His eyes flickered when he saw Mako move. The firebender had curled his hands together and rested his mouth against them.

Mako’s silence was like a toxic gas. It spread wide and far around him, engulfing everything within reach. It even grasped Bolin and held him steady in the doorway of his room, choking him as he waited for his older brother to speak up. Mako dismissed the unnerving silence with the words that changed his life. “…Korra’s pregnant, Bo.” The older brother kept staring straight ahead of him, only blinking when he absolutely needed to. The city lights illuminated the far side of the room and casted off a dull yellow aura, while his side of the room was decorated by the moon’s light glow.

This time it was Bolin’s turn to escort silence around the room. He parted with it as he furrowed his brows. “What?” The world started spinning and images of the girl they had just practiced with last week flashed before his eyes. She was pregnant? As in, she was pregnant when they saw her today? But she didn’t look it, and he didn’t get any weird vibes from her that would have told him she was. She had been the same Korra they always knew. There was just no way. “But that’s…that’s impossible.” He smiled nervously and chuckled, “There’s no way Korra’s pregnant!” Maybe if he laughed it off then his brother would drop his cover and reveal his joke. “I mean, really!” Bolin could feel his fabricated jeer plummeting when he saw Mako’s ochre eyes shift to glance at him and then back to the city; there was nothing but seriousness. “But Korra…she…” It just didn’t seem real. Korra didn’t seem like the kind of girl who would let something like this happen. “…Then who’s the father?”

Mako dropped his head into his hands and went still, and then it all became clear. All of the puzzle pieces fell into place and Bolin examined the picture it all created. It wasn’t a pretty picture; it was one of regret and lies, and one of newfound fear and distress. And the most plaguing and intriguing part was Mako and Korra were right in the middle of it all.

“…No way…” Bolin breathed. “D…when did-“

“Two months ago,” Mako cut in. The sooner he told Bolin everything, the better. He didn’t want to allot the swirling confusion any more time to mess with people. “After we won the match against the Tiger Seals.” He paused and waited for his brother to speak, but he never did. “We were drunk.”

Bolin looked down to the wooden paneling of the floor boards, trying to make more sense of the puzzle before him. He could remember that night; it seemed a little hazy, mostly because it didn’t seem like a night he would have to call upon for serious recollection. Bolin himself had a bit of alcohol, but was only a little tipsy. He could remember his team mates were far worse than he was, but he had barely noticed when they had slipped out of the bar. But Mako was usually a stickler, so the earthbender had just assumed he was going to escort Korra home- even though he had heard no such talk involving her going home. Bolin could see it all now; a distorted picture, but it was still clear enough to see what all had gone on and what lead them to where they were now.

“I just found out today,” Mako grumbled.

“So that’s why she’s been so sick and-”

“Yeah.”

Suddenly Bolin recalled the other day when Asami had gone to go check up on Korra in the bathroom. “Does Asami know?”

“…No.” Mako ran his hands up his face and through his hair. His girlfriend was the last person he wanted to think about. “Just Korra, Pema, me, and now you.” Mako laid his golden eyes on his brother’s form, regret and sorrow plastered all over his face. “I’m sorry, Bo.”

“…Why are you apologizing?” Bolin asked. It wasn’t like his brother had done anything against him.

Mako sighed and placed his face back into his hands. “Because I know you liked Korra.” He then slid his hands down and pinched the bridge of his nose. “…I didn’t mean for things to get so out of hand.”

Oh yeah. He did like Korra; he even bawled over her when he first saw Mako kissing her during last year’s tournament. “Well, yeah. Sure, I like Korra, but…” Bolin paused and gazed out the window at the Island across from the city. He really did like Korra, truly, but he had given up on pursuing her a while ago. He knew Korra wasn’t interested and she had her eyes on someone else; that someone else being his brother. His heart had ached over it for a while, but he noticed how much happier his brother was around her and how happy Korra was around Mako, and this was what helped him move on from the waterbender. His brother needed someone like Korra. “I’m more worried about you and Korra,” he admitted softly. This earned him a touched look from his older brother.

Mako smiled lightly and looked down at the floor. “You don’t need to worry about me, Bolin.” He wouldn’t let anyone worry over him. He was the provider, his job was to worry about the people he held dear, not the other way around. “I’m more concerned about the situation at hand anyway.”

“And Korra…” Bolin mumbled. “Wonder how she’s feeling right about now.”

Oh, spirits, how the guilt dropped on Mako’s head like a ton of bricks. He had totally forgotten about how Korra might be feeling. “Well she…she probably isn’t feeling too happy after how I screwed up today.”

“What did you do?” Bolin cocked his head. His brother didn’t mess up much, and when he did it wasn’t usually that big of a deal- excluding getting the Avatar pregnant that is.

“I sort of…said it couldn’t have been my kid and asked her who the father was.”

“Bro!” Bolin shrieked.

“I know!” Mako held up and hand and grunted. He deserved every bit of scolding, but he at least wanted to get a word in edge wise. “I was confused, okay?” He gave his brother a pitiful look; only Bolin was allowed to see such a look. Mako didn’t like expressing weakness much, especially around his brother. “I didn’t think something like this could happen and…and it just seemed impossible! Me being able to create a life? Come on, Bo, that’s just…so out of this world!”

Bolin had his bushy eyebrows furrowed, but he did consider what Mako had just said. Truth was it was kind of hard to believe. Even now Bolin didn’t feel like an adult and he still had the tendency to think he and Mako were still kids- incapable of adult things. It just seemed like something everyone else was capable of. “I can kind of get that,” Bolin admitted quietly.

“The look on her face…” Mako mumbled, closing his eyes. He wished he could erase the memory of how her icy eyes looked at him like a wounded polar dog. “I feel like a flying boar’s ass,” Mako grumbled.

“Yeah well, you should.” Bolin pouted while crossing his muscular arms. “You know Korra isn’t the kind of girl to go out and do that kind of stuff.” He lessened his sharp features and tried to be a bit more sensitive. “If she says it’s yours, then it’s yours.”

“I know.” Mako went quiet.

Bolin took a moment to study his brother’s still form. He was hunched over with his elbows on his knees and his forehead rested against his fist. His gold eyes were hazily focused on nothing but whatever was on his mind. Bolin had reading Mako like a book down to an art, or at least he liked to think so. His brother was already burning his own butt over all of this, which was obvious from his all-day disappearance. But Bolin couldn’t help but wonder if Mako would have done all of this if it were Asami or some other girl. He was sure he would have, but there was always something different about Mako’s posture whenever Korra was around or mentioned. It was warmer, relaxed, and more fluid. Even now while he was a bundle of nerves, Mako was still radiating something. It was only with Korra; Bolin never sensed those vibes whenever Asami was in the picture.

“I don’t think you made the right choice,” Bolin blurted out.

“No kidding, Bo. I got Korra pregnant,” Mako deadpanned.

Bolin dropped his gaze to the floor. “No that’s…that’s not what I was talking about…” Bolin’s voice dropped to a whisper. Now wasn’t the time to bring up such things. There were more important things to worry about. Bolin looked back up at Mako. “So…what are you gonna do?”

“I don’t know yet,” Mako admitted. “I just need some time to figure everything out.” He paused. “I really don’t know how to feel about all of this.”

“So are you gonna go talk to Korra?” Bolin asked.

“I will, but…I want to get stuff sorted out first.” Mako frowned and his eyebrows knitted together in guilt. “I don’t want to say something stupid like I did today.”

“I think that was shock talking, bro,” Bolin said earnestly. “I don’t think you’ll do anything that stupid again.”

Mako sighed and lifted himself off the sofa. “I don’t know. But I’m going to try and get some sleep.” Mako headed towards his bedroom door. “Good night, Bo. Thanks for the ear.”

Bolin lightly smiled. “Anytime, Bro.”

The door closed behind him, leaving Bolin to sit in the darkness of the room. He thought back on everything he had just discovered and how things were going to change from here on out. He didn’t feel overwhelmed or distraught. Instead he was more curious than anything. So much could happen in the near future and while he didn’t know what the future held, he trusted it would work out fine.

Besides, the idea of being an uncle was enough to make him look on the bright side.


	4. The Girl with The World on Her Shoulders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, she'd be damned.

Five days.

Five days since Korra learned of the child supposedly taking residence inside of her.

Four days since she told the father of the child. Four days since the father rejected her and the child. Four days of trying to come to terms with everything, but succeeding in nothing close to acceptance. None of it felt real; a nightmare if anything, and she expected to wake up, but she didn’t. Every day she was jolted awake in the mornings by the urge to vomit, but sleep wouldn’t easily come back to her. Two weeks of being as sick as a dog, but no cure, because it wasn’t an actual illness.

Tenzin wasn’t informed of the details of her doctor visit. Instead she lied and told him it was a long-term bug that could easily last up to a month. So now her teacher wouldn’t allow her to train. Her only outlet had been bending, but now even that was taken away from her. Meditation was the only thing she was allowed to participate in. Instead of meditating the way she should have been, she would sit and fret over her predicament and make herself physically ill…or maybe it was just the morning sickness talking.

However, she did try to work things out in her head. But there was so much to sort through that she often got overwhelmed. For the last few days she had been thinking about Mako. Korra thought that she could just quit thinking about him once she told him and he denied the child. After all, she was supposed to feel less stress by getting her confession off of her chest, right? So she should feel relieved. But she came to find out that she wasn’t relieved at all. Instead, the reality of his reaction weighed heavily on her heart.

Why did his opinion matter so much, anyway? Korra had thought that his reaction wouldn’t have had such a lasting effect on her. He wanted to help out with this baby situation? That was fine. He didn’t want to have anything to do with it? That was fine, too. Or at least, she had thought it would go down that easy. Instead, the scene replayed itself over and over again in her head, and his words echoed through the empty corridors of her mind.

Maybe what hurt her the most was she thought he had been her friend. Mako was such a good person who put others before himself and took great care of his brother and friends. But maybe he wasn’t her friend to begin with. She could recall a lot of bonding moments they had shared, but they must have meant absolutely nothing to him if he was able to close her out so easily.

Four days since she had talked to him. He made no attempt to reestablish contact with her.

This made her heart fall limp in the confines of her ribcage.

He had her pegged as a whore; sleeping with just any guy she wanted. She wasn’t sure what hurt more: him thinking she was easy, or just flat out disregarding his child. Korra figured that the pain was about equal and decided to just let both of them chain down her weakened psyche.

Still, she was determined to solve these problems. If Mako wasn’t going to help her, then she would do it by herself! For Agni’s sake, she was the Avatar! If she could handle the world on her own, then she could surely handle something as simple as a child by herself!

Even so, she couldn’t help but feel pain in the hole Mako had burnt in her heart.

\--

Korra had zoned out the world around her one evening and sat quietly on the steps of the temple. She had finished meditating for the day and didn’t feel like returning inside to deal with all of the people she shared the home with. The warmth of the summer air brought her a little bit of ease, actually. The humidity was a refreshing reminder that she could still feel the world around her; the moisture in the air sticking to her skin- or what little skin she had showing. The waterbender was still self-conscious and made an effort to cover her torso with her parka. Tenzin had raised a brow at her one day when she chose to wear something so warm on a hot day. She had lied and said she was cold- a side effect of the bug she had.

Her mind had ventured off to Mako again. As much as she hated him for acting the way he did, she missed her firebending friend. Whether he was her friend or not, she missed what they had- he was always the one who kept her cool in heated situations and was her voice of reason when hers went on an unexpected vacation. They would pal around and joke with each other, and they could talk for hours. It would be a lie if she said she didn’t like him. She liked him a lot. But he was with his dream girl and she wouldn’t stand in the way of his happiness.

“Ohhhh Korrrraaaa!”

Korra’s eyes widened and she looked up. She was surprised, and maybe even just a little glad, to see Bolin sauntering up the steps to meet her at the platform. The earthbender had a bag in his fisted hand and his trusty fire ferret on his shoulder. He had his usual broad smile on his face, but as he got closer she could have sworn she saw something else in his features.

“Oh, hey Bolin.” She smiled weakly. Bolin was a welcome distraction, but at the same time he only reminded her that his brother was one of the things on her mind.

“I bought some dumplings,” Bolin said, as he held up the bag in his hand, “and I realized ‘Oh, I bought too many’. So I thought, ‘Hey, why not stop by and see if Korra wants any!’”

“Since when is buying too much food a problem for you?” She smirked. “You eat, like, all the time.”

Bolin held his chin and squinted, thinking over her words. “Hm. This is true,” He murmured. “But I figured you and your bundle of joy could use the extra food.”

Korra’s heart sank and her eyes went downcast. “Oh…” She wrapped her arms around herself again. “You…know about that?” She hadn’t really expected anyone else to know.

“Yeah,” Bolin sighed, but smiled. “Mako told me everything.” He took a seat next to her and fished a dumpling out of the bag.

“Guess I should have figured as much,” Korra mumbled to herself.

“I wasn’t supposed to know, was I?”

“Well, it’s not really that.” She shrugged, her eyebrows pinched in concern. She hadn’t thought about Mako telling Bolin, but she should have assumed he would. The brothers hardly ever kept secrets from each other. And if Mako was mad, or bothered by the news she had given him earlier in the week, then of course he would blast off his steam to Bolin. She just wondered what the firebender had told his earthbending brother. “What did he tell you?” She looked over at her friend as he polished off a dumpling and went in for another kill.

“That you were pregnant and that he had just found out that day,” Bolin stated simply. He thought about telling her more, but he didn’t want to display his brother’s feelings of remorse; that was Mako’s job, not his. And as much as he wanted to reassure Korra and tell her everything Mako had told him, he kept his mouth shut. His brother’s trust meant enough to him that he would keep his lips sealed.

“Yeah.” Of course that would be all he said. He didn’t want his little brother or anyone else to see him as a jerk. “I guess that’s the gist of it.” She wasn’t in the mood to challenge any of it; for now she would just roll with it.

“So are you okay?” Bolin asked, his smile turning into a frown of concern. “We haven’t seen you around for a few days, and you look pretty down.” He tore off a small piece of his treat and gave some to Pabu.

“I didn’t really think I was wanted around…you know, after spilling the beans.” If that was Mako’s way of wanting Korra around, then she needed to reevaluate her social skills.

“No, we’d love to have you…” Bolin stopped and looked down, his face taking on a sad appearance. “Mako hasn’t really been around much lately, anyway.” He shrugged. “He’s been working and just…out on the town I guess.”

Korra’s thoughts couldn’t help but bitterly turn to her rich best friend. No doubt Mako was trying to ink out Korra’s existence by hanging out with Asami. She hadn’t seen her in the last few days either, but she chalked it up to being that Asami thought Korra was still sick and needed her rest. “He’s probably just with Asami or something.”

“Actually,” Bolin looked at her with sympathy, “I don’t think he’s been seeing her much lately.”

It also made sense to Korra if Mako didn’t want to see Asami because he felt bad for sleeping with another girl. For this, she felt bad.

“But you know, just because you’re…you know…doesn’t mean we don’t want you around anymore!” the earthbender chirped. He was trying his darndest to keep the conversation light and airy, but it seemed like the more they talked, the heavier and stuffy it got.

“Judging by the way he acted, I don’t think Mako wants to see me any time soon- if at all.” Korra slouched, the full force of her previous grief coming back to haunt her.

“No, he’s…” Bolin stopped and tried to find the right words. He didn’t want Korra to feel even more put out by his brother’s neglect. “He’s just really confused right now.”

“Yeah well, so am I,” Korra grumbled and gently lay down on her side on the stone steps. She kept her arms circled around her torso and hugged herself tighter.

“I know,” Bolin said solemnly. His brother had made it really hard for him to defend him. “He’s trying to get stuff sorted out, but in the meantime,” Bolin smiled broadly at the waterbender, his grin reaching his ears, “you can come talk to good ol’ Bolin!”

Korra lifted her head to look over her body and look Bolin in the eye. She offered him a weak smile before laying her head back onto the cold stone. “Thanks, Bolin.”

It truthfully did mean a lot to her, but she couldn’t see herself talking to Bolin about any of this. The earthbender was Mako’s brother after all. Mako would be sure to hear anything Korra said through Bolin, because everyone knew Bolin wasn’t very good at keeping things to himself. Korra didn’t want to dump all of this complicated jazz on Bolin, anyway; she could barely deal with it as it was, no need to confuse someone else with it.

\--

He’d go talk to her tonight. His mind was made up. Even if she was still really angry or hurt by what he had said, he still needed to make amends and say what he needed to say. He’d avoided Korra for an entire week, not that it was hard to not see her. She hadn’t been around and he had been everywhere and anywhere except for Air Temple Island and Asami’s. But every night, he would stare out as the island while he tried to recover from the long days of work and practice, and try to organize his thoughts.

Mako was beginning to accept the facts. Korra was pregnant with their child, a child neither one of them was prepared for. How they would come to be prepared he didn’t yet know, but he knew he would figure this out once he talked to Korra. These were the basic facts.

The more complicated facts were his current girlfriend and how his future was going to pan out from there. He had gone behind Asami’s back, unintentionally, but he still slept with another girl and that alone was a hard blow to stand. To have a baby thrown into the mix only made things even more complicated. But Mako knew he didn’t really have any excuses. After he talked to Korra, he would tell Asami and take whatever she had to say- he deserved every word of it. If she was willing to try and repair their relationship then he was all for it, but if she didn’t then, she didn’t.

These decisions weren’t difficult to reach; they were simple and blunt. However the tornado of emotional shock had left him frazzled and at a complete loss before he had reached the calm of the storm. But from what Bolin had told him, Korra had yet to reach peace with what was going on. It nearly broke him to hear it.

She had been in utter turmoil and he hadn’t done anything to help her; he only made things worse and even worse still. But he didn’t want to continue doing damage by going to her with scattered thoughts and possibly upset her more. The firebender was used to having things under control, so naturally he wanted to be in control of his emotions and thoughts before jumping into a situation. But he also knew that with Korra there was no such thing as control; whatever he had to defend his new wall around him, it was sure to be broken down by Korra. It was rather strange how she was the only person in the world who was able to do that. Oh how he hated it so.

Either way, he would go to visit her after his work shift. Mako knew that whatever Korra had to say or throw at him was going to smash his wall. But sometimes he wondered if he was purposefully building weak walls, just so she could knock them down and reach him.

\--

Korra usually loved the evening time. After a long day of training, she would sit down with her favorite airbending family and eat dinner with them, listening and contributing to the idle chatter which circled around the wooden table. But lately she hadn’t been talking much and she barely paid attention to the words floating around her. Tenzin had asked if she was okay, but Korra had assured him it was just because she still wasn’t feeling well, which wasn’t a total lie.

Her favorite time of the day was usually the quiet immediately after dinner. The children would run their separate ways; sometimes they would go outside and play, or the girls would go play with dolls, and Meelo would ruin the little worlds his sisters build around the plastic characters. Tenzin would usually go back to his office and finish up any business he had left and Pema would clean the dishes and play with Rohan. Korra would normally either relax or continue to train until it was dark, but nowadays she sat around and stared into space. It was concerning to everyone in the house, all except for maybe Pema, who was very aware of the predicament at hand.

On one particular evening, exactly a week since Korra had told Mako she was expecting, Tenzin and Korra were sitting at the table. Pema was right in the other room within ear shot, cleaning the dishes.

The usual warm atmosphere Korra felt around Tenzin was gone, and filled with suffocating ice and anxiety. She was his pupil and he was her teacher, but she knew something he didn’t know and it was going to break the foundation they had built. Perhaps it wouldn’t irrevocably shatter it, but it was going to leave a crack in the sturdy floor which they stood.

She tightened her fists and stared down at the wooden table with hard eyes. There would be no perfect time to tell her mentor about her predicament. She didn’t have to worry about Mako anymore- she was on her own from this point forward. There was no point in putting off telling her teacher and taking the next step...whatever that was. Once she told him, then she could get a little bit more stress off of her already burdened shoulders.

Despite this slight motivation, Korra still tried to make up rationalizations to wait. Maybe she should talk to Pema again, or maybe even try to wait for Mako to come to his senses. But she would bitterly slash herself for thinking such things. Mako had a life to live, and wasn’t at all interested in a life involving her and a child; she couldn’t blame him. Still, the anxiety and fear always ate away at her whenever she wasn’t busy. She hadn’t been sleeping well since she had discovered she was with child. Every night she stressed about the possibilities and every night she threw up multiple times; she wasn’t even sure if it was because of the baby or because of stress anymore.

Korra glanced over at the airbender who was currently reading the newspaper; he often had to in order to see what kinds of lies the press was feeding the city. To address the city and to reason with the council, Tenzin had to know the people’s fears and concerns. Even if he already knew what was at stake, he always tried to look at things through the people’s perspective. Korra admired this about her tutor. It only made her stomach sink further when she thought about how much he already had on his plate. He had a crumbling city, a family of four children and a wife, he had to put up with a distorted council, and he, like Korra, was also trying to bring an Equalist madman to justice. To add more to the list, he was the last airbender –or at least of legal age- and that alone brought on a whole different set of responsibilities. Including training the Avatar.

But what kind of airbending training could she do if she was knocked up and trying to raise a kid? Tenzin would probably send her back to the South Pole. He didn’t need to put up with an unwed, pregnant teenager.

The thought of the South Pole made her heart crash through her ribs. Oh Agni, her parents! She had completely forgotten about them. They would be so disappointed; a magnitude equal to that of Tenzin’s, she was sure. Her parents let her go off to Republic City so she could learn airbending and follow her path as the Avatar, but instead she was going to come crawling back home because she let alcohol and lust get the better of her. It would be the most embarrassing thing to happen to her, but she knew her parents would still love her and be supportive. They would probably even come to love having a grandchild, but she wondered if her loving parents could ever look at her the same way ever again.

Korra felt her shoulders grow heavy. The more she thought, the worse things seemed to get. The worse things seemed to get, the more she anxious she got. And the more anxious she got, the more impatient she became.

There would be no perfect time to tell her teacher. And no matter where or when, he would still love respect for her and she would still feel awful about everything. The best time to tell him would be when the kids weren’t around and when everything was quiet.

A time like now.

She kept her eyes locked on the table top and wrung her hands, trying to squeeze out any courage and calm she could use. She sighed with a shaky breath; her stomach flipping like a trapeze artist. “I’m pregnant.”

Korra cringed when she heard the dishes in the kitchen sink clatter. Pema obviously wasn’t expecting this, at least not right now. Tenzin lowered his newspaper, stealing a look at the kitchen door and then at Korra. His brows were raised and his grey eyes were alert, but his calm was still there. “What did you say?”

What was it with men not being able to hear her the first time? She looked up at Tenzin through her eyelashes and then back at the table. “I said I’m pregnant.”

Tenzin’s eyes were wide and a building tension coiled beneath the blanket of silence. Korra didn’t even feel nervous anymore. Now she just waited for the tirade of piss-fire that was sure to be Tenzin’s wrath. His anger wasn’t what scared her, though.

“W-wh…how did…when…” He seemed absolutely bewildered as he looked around the room and moved his hands around; she had tried that already, the answer wasn’t in the decorations or the air. But maybe he could find it, since he could bend it.

She didn’t feel like explaining- it wouldn’t matter. Whatever information she gave him wouldn’t serve as a buffer; Tenzin would say what he felt like saying.

“How did this happen!?” he demanded hastily.

Well if she was already in deep mud anyways, she might as well keep some of her humor. It had grown rusty in the past few weeks. Korra rested her face in her hand and cocked a brow at her mentor.

Oh that did it.

“What were you thinking?!” The familiar wrinkle between Tenzin’s eyebrows made its appearance and a flush was creeping up from the back of his head.

“Obviously I wasn’t,” she mumbled. Alcohol made people do crazy things outside of their reasoning, but she wouldn’t tell him that.

“Obviously not!” Tenzin barked. He slapped a hand on the table and brought the other one up as if he were trying to think. “Korra, I can’t believe you’ve gone out and done something so foolish!” His eyes flitted wildly around the room; his mind was spinning, trying to process all he wanted to say. “I expected better from you!”

“Yeah, well, so did the rest of the world.” She was beginning to feel the collie gator of disappointment biting at her heels.

“Do you even realize what kind of situation you have put yourself in? We’re in the middle of a full-out war with the Equalists, and the people need their Avatar to be ready at a moment’s notice.”

Not like she hadn’t already thought this through.

“And your airbending training!” The pink hue on Tenzin’s head was steadily climbing to a red color. “You came here to master your airbending; you can’t do that if you’re expecting a child!”

The airbender was preaching the choir of her mind.

“And the child! This child won’t get the attention and love it needs!”

That stung. She had at least tried to believe that maybe she could give the child love. But apparently Tenzin didn’t see her capable. She felt like a dog getting beaten over the head with a stick. Korra hated that feeling; the feeling of being defenseless.

“And with the tension building with Amon and the city, the child could be put at danger!”

Korra had thought she would take all of his scolding with dignity. Her plan had been to stay quiet and take everything he had to throw at her. But the more her airbending teacher spoke, the more she found it difficult to reign in her growing anger. The waterbender looked out of the corner of her eyes to find Pema at the kitchen doorway. She was standing still, like she was afraid to add salt to the already fizzing snail frog. Korra did notice how the nonbender would open her mouth to speak, but then Tenzin would unintentionally cut her off.

Tenzin tripped over his onslaught of chiding, only to come up with another question. “Who in the world is the father?!”

“Mako,” Korra answered dully. It wasn’t like that question was important anymore.

“What?” Tenzin’s pink face seemed to pale for a split second.

Korra reevaluated the way she held herself in front of others. Maybe she really did come off as a floozy- because the shock both Mako and Tenzin expressed seemed to tell her so.

“I can’t believe this,” Tenzin growled to himself.

“Neither could he,” Korra hushed under her breath. Luckily Tenzin was too caught up in himself to hear her.

“I knew I should have never allowed you off of the island.” He glared down at the table. “It proved to be nothing but a distraction, and now look what’s happened!” He looked directly into Korra’s eyes and it unnerved her.

“Tenzin,” Pema tried to call out to her husband.

“Not now, Pema,” Tenzin answered. “You completely disregarded your title as Avatar and went and…” Tenzin’s face reddened with what could have been anger or a blush. “And now this!” He held out both of his hands towards Korra.

Another jab hit her and her anger grew slightly. It wasn’t like she purposefully threw down her Avatar duties just to sleep with Mako. Her sorry demeanor was beginning to ebb away and reveal a much more upset side of her psyche.

“I’m very disappointed in you,” Tenzin glowered.

Korra felt her heart hit the soles of her feet and shatter. His disappointment would always hurt her more than any of his temper tantrums.

“You have effectively forfeited your position in this war and have abandoned your duty as Avatar by flagrantly…” He paused again. “Well, you know what you did!”

“Tenzin,” Pema tried again, but Tenzin brushed her off.

“I can assure you this, Avatar Aang and the preceding Avatars would have never let such as thing-”

That was it.

Korra slammed her fists on the table and stood up from her mat on the floor. Her reserved behavior was now gone. She felt like she had taken more than enough damage control from her mentor. She was so riled, she started yelling. “Look, I know I’m a giant screw up and the worse Avatar in the entire history of Avatars and I’d probably be the worst mom ever, too! I’ll never live up to Avatar Aang and according to you I’ll never be able to love a child! So just shut up and quit telling me stuff I already know!”

She turned on her heels so quickly that she could feel the heat from the friction through her boot. As she headed out the door, she could hear Tenzin yelling for her to come back, but her anger was creating a barrier between her and the words which echoed behind her.

Once she got to the peace and quiet of her room, she could feel her blind rage slowly dissipate. The red she had been seeing had faded to the soft blue aura of her dark room and soon she could feel the loneliness set in around her. Loneliness brought company, which was never a good thing. It brought its good friend, the World, and once again perched it on her shoulders. Her chest felt heavy with each heaving breath she took and her furrowed brow pulled apart.

Telling Tenzin was supposed to get rid of some of the problem; lift some of the burden off of her shoulders. But instead she felt a new dread weigh her down. When was the world going to stop spinning? When was this going to become graspable and easy to comprehend? Disappointment smacked her across the face and the rage returned; burning inefficiency directed towards herself. She blindly lashed out and smashed a vase on a table onto the floor. The noise echoed in her small room; she was reminded just how alone she really was. The noise halted and the only evidence that it had ever existed were the broken pieces on the floor.

The noise echoed in her mind and her rage once again dissipated.

She was alone. No one was there.

No Tenzin. No Mako. No one.

And at that moment, even though she knew Pema and Bolin would have her back, she had never felt such emptiness inside and outside of her being. She was alone; alone with a baby, alone with the world. Korra placed her fists against the wall, slowly bringing her forehead to rest against them.

She wanted to forget everything. But she couldn’t.

The world on her shoulders wouldn’t allow her to.

\--

The walk up the island steps was always long and tiring for the young firebender. It wouldn’t have worn him out so much if he hadn’t just gotten off of a twelve-hour work shift, but at least he had put food on the table. Bolin had definitely been pleased when Mako brought home his favorite meal and reported his plans for the rest of the day. He had told Bolin he was going to go to Air Temple Island and talk to Korra. Whether or not the outcome was a good one, Bolin was glad his older brother had finally come to his senses.

Mako wasn’t exactly sure how he was going to go about talking to Korra. He had it planned out so far as showing up at her doorstep. He had tried to scope out any possible adverse reactions she might have against him- and he knew he deserved it. But he really needed to say what was on his mind and how sorry he was about everything. So even if Korra was breathing fire and screeching like a ring-tailed lemur, he would deal with it.

She had to know he didn’t mean what he had said to her a week ago. And she had to know what had been going through his mind from then up until now. And he wanted –needed- to know she was okay. Maybe once all of this was out of the way, then they could truly begin to figure out this whole ‘parenthood’ fiasco they had gotten themselves into.

As Mako reached the top of the steps he saw the airbending children slouching at the porch of the front entrance. They were all frowning and staring down at the stoned pathway with concern.

“Hey, is everything okay?” Mako asked.

All three of the children looked up and smiled with relief. All of them got up and rushed over to greet the young firebender. “Mako, we’re so glad you’re here!” Jinora sighed.

“Um, me too.” He smiled nervously. He supposed he was glad to be there, although he wished the circumstances were more jovial. “So, what’s going on?”

“Daddy and Korra got into a fight,” Ikki said quickly with a frown.

“What?” Mako’s first thought immediately flew to the baby, but he secretly prayed to the spirits that maybe the airbending master and the Avatar had fought over something training related.

“They were yelling,” Meelo pouted.

“Do you know what they were fighting about?” He honestly hoped the children didn’t know anything about any of this.

“No,” Jinora frowned. “We just heard dad yelling and then we heard Korra yell before everything went quiet.”

Mako had a bad feeling that they weren’t arguing over some training routine.

“Do you know why they were fighting?” Ikki asked.

“No, but I have a pretty good idea,” Mako mumbled to himself. “Where’s Korra?” Agni, he was going to be the last person besides Tenzin that Korra wanted to see.

“Her room,” Jinora informed.

“Thanks.” Mako took off at a dead run towards the direction of the waterbender’s room. He made a mental note to laugh at Meelo’s “Hey, no boys allowed in girl’s rooms!” comment later. For now he just prayed he could remember the way to Korra’s room without getting lost and bumping into Tenzin on the way.

Mako cursed himself up and down. He couldn’t believe how stupid they both were. He couldn’t believe how stupid he was for accusing her of sleeping around and for putting her out; how stupid he was for making her wait so long for him to get back to her. He couldn’t believe how stupid Korra was for not waiting for him to tell Tenzin together. She didn’t need to take that kind of punishment by herself. But it was in Korra’s nature to take a hit for others, and it was in her nature to be impatient. He would blame himself for this more than her; he made an impatient girl wait on something more important than just a date or a surprise. He made her wait on fear and confusion. But he couldn’t take back what he had done, or what Korra had done. Right now all he could do was try and make things right.

He didn’t even bother knocking on her door; Bolin would have scolded him for manners. He threw the door open, his eyes first landing on the broken vase on the floor. It was a rule of thumb that whenever something was broken after a dramatic conversation, that the conversation must have gone incredibly badly for whoever broke the vase. Mako’s ochre eyes swept the floor and then landed on Korra’s feet. They slid up her form. She was against the wall, her forehead resting on her fists in a defeated manner. She looked like a child who was trying to hide from a parent’s punishment.

“Tenzin, I swear if you-” She whirled her head around to defend herself, but her ground was shaken when she saw the firebender at her doorway. Her angry face turned into one of shock. The last person she had expected to see was her probending teammate. She froze in her place, trying to let her mind catch up with what her eyes were seeing. Out of all the time in the world, he picked now to show up at the threshold of her room.

Korra tried to compose herself as Mako quietly slid the door shut behind him. “Oh, Mako…” Korra found herself brining her arms around her torso again. She put all of her weight on her right side and gazed down at the floor. “What are you doing here?” She hadn’t expected to see him, at least not today- especially immediately after spilling the beans to Tenzin. Then again, Mako always had impeccable timing.

“Are you alright?” He skipped over her question.

“Y-yeah, I’m fine.” She paused. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“The kids told me you and Tenzin were yelling at each other, there’s a vase smashed on the floor, and you were facing the wall.” The firebender was a little surprised that the waterbending beauty hadn’t yelled at him and told him to scram; he had come up with a speech to counter that kind of behavior. He wasn’t prepared to confront a vulnerable Korra.

“I’m fine.” She wasn’t.

“No, you’re not.” He knew it.

“Why are you here?” She was glad he could read her, but that didn’t make it that much easier to deal with everything that was going on. Dancing around her feelings had worked so far, she could create an elaborate choreography if it meant avoiding tender topics.

Mako had almost forgotten why he had showed up in the first place. He wasn’t used to having to come up with excuses to come and see her. Before everything had gotten complicated, he and his brother could swing by, just because they could. “I came to talk to you.”

“…About what?” Korra shrugged. She knew, but she thought maybe if she doubted it, then she would be protected from the world.

Mako felt his stomach deflate. She had already erased him from the equation. He just hoped that maybe he could write himself back in with ink. “You know what.” His gaze was pulled down to the ground, but he made it a priority to try and hold her eyes as much as possible.

“You already said what you needed to say.” Her form went ridged. Protecting herself from whatever else he had to say was all she could do now.

Mako had seen a lot of sad things in his life. He had seen children starving on the streets, and people tearing each other down with their fists and hateful words. His little brother’s eyes water when he realized Mom and Dad were never coming back. A guarded, defeated Korra was just another one to add to his list of heart wrenching memories.

He took a bold stride until he was inches away from her. Her eyes darted up from the floor, but didn’t get to his face before he had pulled her to his form. Shock filled the Avatar, electricity shooting through her feet and up to her head, then leaving a warm feeling to put her body at ease. She relaxed a little; Mako wouldn’t be doing this if he had something truly bad to say; or at least she hoped. But she kept her guard up. After what he had said before, there was no telling what kinds of words might come out of his mouth. She wouldn’t let this break her.

His arms wrapped around her and her mind ventured back to the night that started this crazy thing. She could recall the warm feeling of his arms wrapped around her body, his hands leaving a trail of fire across her skin, like he was bending her to his will. The alcohol which wired their nerves and charged their systems fueled their hazy passions to inch further and further to the point of no return.

She wondered just how drunk they really were. Granted their…act was a bit sloppy, but it was still coordinated enough for her to feel the chills of pleasure run up her spine, even now. What’s more, she could remember so much of it through her blurs of her alcohol-smudged memory reel. She brought her spinning movie reel to a stop. They had agreed to leave that night behind them, and even though there was a consequence, quite literally in between the two of them, they could still forget the night itself.

Korra slowly blinked, trying to numb herself. It was a different kind of pain; knowing she would never get to feel him in that way again, and the pain of knowing she had let down everyone around her. Each had their own acute pain which made her chest hurt. But she decided it was better to fret over the pain of the consequences rather than to revel in the pain which she was supposed to have abandoned after waking up in bed with Mako. When she opened her eyes again, she was back in the present, all of its heartache before her; the shuddering pain of two months ago locked away and gagged so that it may never speak.

Still, just because she was in the present, didn’t mean she wanted to hear what he had to say to her. She figured maybe she could prolong it by pulling something else out from behind her back. But the only thing she could find was her recent spat with the airbender.

“Tenzin was so angry.” Korra felt a whimper hitch in her throat, but she stopped it. She mentally slapped herself; she had picked an equally emotionally traumatizing event to speak about.

“I know,” Mako said softly.

“I got chewed out big time…” Korra grumbled. She felt like dead weight against Mako; she was so tired.

“Korra, I’m so sorry,” Mako rasped as he put his hand on the back of her head.

“It’s alright,” she mumbled and gripped the fabric of his jacket. She never realized just how good the rough material felt between her fingers. “I’m just glad you’re here now.”

And she was. It almost didn’t matter to her what he had said- not at this point in time. The world was spinning so wildly and it felt like everyone around her was an angry, disappointed blur. To have someone, anyone, here with her meant more to her than anyone could imagine. But it meant slightly more to her that it was Mako out of all of them.

“No, it’s not.” Mako craned his head back to look at her, but she wouldn’t look up at him. “I should have been here sooner.”

He hated how she wouldn’t look him in the eye. He felt like just words alone wouldn’t fix the damage he had done- he knew that would take time. But maybe if she saw how much he meant it, then it would help. Mako gently grabbed Korra’s chin and brought her gaze to his own. “I should have been here for you sooner. But I was only thinking of myself. I completely forgot about how you might be feeling.”

Korra’s eyes looked down; looking at him had never been so hard. His words were making her heart tremble and the tears she had been fighting come even closer to falling. She had already let Pema see her cry; she’d be damned if she let Mako see her too.

“And I’m sorry for what I said,” he stated abruptly. “I knew I was the father.” The firebender admitted with shame. “I just…I couldn’t believe it.” He paused, hoping –praying- he could see some form of undeserved understanding in her icy eyes, but he couldn’t tell if it was there. “It’s just…all of this feels so unreal.” He was still having a difficult time coming to terms with the truth. Him, a street kid, had a hand in creating a life; he’d never quiet be able to grasp such an amazing concept. “So I’m sorry. You have every right to be mad at me and-”

The water was so close to breaking the dam; so dangerously, dangerously close. Mako just kept letting all of these words come fumbling out of his mouth and it was enough to pull at her heart strings. It wasn’t just that, though- it was everything. Everyone in the world was counting on her; she had Equalists crawling around the city, causing all kinds of havoc for benders and peaceful nonbenders alike. She had a crazed Equalist leader who could take bending away with a movement of his hand. She still had to learn airbending in order to become a full-fledged Avatar, not that it mattered- everyone was already displeased with her and she was never going to be able to master it, anyway. Then she had the brothers, who had been depending on their waterbender to help them win this year’s tournament. With all of these things she couldn’t possibly apologize for, Mako was holding her, apologizing about one little thing he did wrong. Out of all the people in the world, she should be the one apologizing- even if Mako needed to say he was sorry for being a jerk.

All of this was dawning on her like a ton of bricks, crushing her and dragging her down into the ocean. A cold chill ran over her body and the trembling started. And then…

Well, she’d be damned.

Korra wrapped her arms around Mako and clutched his back. She buried her face into his chest, hoping to find security when the world offered her none. A sharp breathe of air hitched in her throat and her body tightened. The tears started falling when she felt Mako pull her closer and rest his face in her hair.

He was here. Someone was here, but more importantly, it was him.

She tried her best to restrict her sobs, but her trembling body was giving her away. She didn’t try to stop the tears anymore; she hated for him to see her like this, but she wasn’t going to hold it back now. Letting the warm liquid fall from her eyes felt good, like the world was being lifted from her shoulders. “I can’t believe any of this is happening,” she said through a blockade of tears. “Everything was fine two weeks ago…but now…”

“I know…” Mako uttered softly.

“I wish none of this ever happened,” Korra said under her breath. “I can’t keep this baby, Mako.” Korra choked and shook her head slowly against the firebender’s chest. A bitter sob escaped her throat and she buried her face in his scarf. The bitter heartache was hitting her; for once she couldn’t do something. In the past she was always able to rise up and meet a challenge, but this…this was out of her league. She already had enough to deal with, but a baby? Even if she didn’t have a lot going on, she still didn’t think she could do it. She was young and not married; no place of her own and she was relying on so many people. People were supposed to rely on her, not the other way around. “I just have too much to deal with already and…” she trailed off, unable to list off her reasons and excuses.

Mako didn’t know how to reply. In substitute for words, he rocked her gently side to side and held her tight. What was the appropriate thing to say to a girl who had the whole world on her shoulders? He felt like he could only say the things she had probably heard most. ‘Things will be okay’ was the first thing to come to mind. But he really didn’t know if things would be okay, and Mako wasn’t someone who enjoyed lying, although he had to on the streets as a child, and most recently within his relationship with Asami.

“What should I do?” she whispered and shook against him.

“I don’t know,” he mumbled, holding her even tighter. He had to make sure she knew that just because neither of them had the answers, it didn’t mean that all hope was lost. Mako had a massive dislike to admitting fear; he liked to think he was someone his brother could look up to and rely on. He was the protector, the provider, the strong one... but he was scared right then. Even so, he would keep up his calm façade for the waterbender in his arms. “But we’re gonna figure something out. I promise.” Mako managed to get Korra to move to her bed. The waterbender laid down, already missing Mako’s warmth.

It was a mess, and Korra was bad at cleaning up messes. She had always had someone else to do it for her. As if sleeping with Mako hadn’t already left a giant mess in her wake, now a baby was thrown into the equation. It was like a messy room; she didn’t know where to start and there was so much to sort through. It would be so much easier to just throw all of the stuff out and get rid of it.

Get rid of it…

The notion stung her frayed nerves. It was never a choice she thought she’d ever have to make. But it was the smartest choice, after all. She was in no position to take care of a helpless life, and neither was Mako. It just wasn’t in the cards for them right now- nor should it ever be in the cards for them together. They could move on from each other and this messy room they had made.

“I can’t keep it.” Korra’s voice was hollow. Mako ran his fingers across her forehead as he brushed loose strands out of her face. “I just can’t.” She swallowed another bout of emotion and tears. Korra closed her eyes and snuggled into her pillow. Comfort was an elusive being nowadays. Hopefully she would start to feel better now that she had cried all over the firebender at her bedside and was starting to come to a decision.

Mako just wanted her to calm down and rest. It was clear she hadn’t slept much in the past week; she appeared thinner, not very rich in color, and the purple bags under her eyes were a dead giveaway. For the time being he was far more concerned about her health rather than the baby position they were in. But he could tell she wasn’t going to calm down; she was still waiting for something. She was waiting for him to respond to what she had just said.

“I can’t keep it.”

He knew very well what she meant. He focused on her trembling form under the covers; she came first in his mind. The firebender leaned forward to get a little closer to Korra. “No matter what you decide,” Mako whispered, “I’m here for you.”

Korra latched her eyes onto his, barely registering the feeling of his hand on her arm. His ochre eyes were serious, but filled with so much concern for her. He was okay with it. There was now a quick solution to the problem in sight; they could continue on with their lives as if none of this nightmare had ever happened.

She swallowed, slowly closing her eyes in acceptance. Korra’s body slowly stopped shaking, and even more slowly she began to slip into a heavy slumber.

Mako waited and watched as she fell asleep. He gently squeezed her hand and evaluated what had just happened. Korra was worn from an emotional war and her body had taken a toll. For now, sleep was her only medication; food and water would be prescribed later, but for now maybe she could rest with some peace of mind. The decision which had been reached had yet to sink in; he was just thanking the spirits that Korra found enough peace to sleep.


	5. Last Grain of Sand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> that last grain made all the difference.

He was supposed to be a patient man; a man of understanding and virtue. He was raised to be as such by his father, the last airbender and Avatar, as well as his mother. He took his role quite seriously; taking great pride in being an airbender, as well as the son of the previous Avatar. Tenzin was just as serious and proud of training the new Avatar. However…he couldn’t say he was proud about how he had just treated her. His father, back in the day, would have pulled him back and told him to calm down and try to find a silver lining. His mother would have had a similar reaction to his own, however she would have probably come around. Now if his mother had seen him at her old age, she would have smacked him over the head. Katara had a soft spot for Avatar Korra, and she knew just how tough it could be to be a teenage girl and the Avatar.

Spirits, he was grateful neither of them were physically there to see how he had yelled at his pupil.

Of course, Tenzin was still disappointed in Korra’s choices. He was even still just a bit angry. But he had come to accept that his reaction was a bit overboard. The airbender was supposed to be a figure of support to his student, However he had failed in doing such. Instead, he had lashed out at her and reminded her just how foolish she was.

Oh, but while his parents weren’t there to scold him, his wife sure was. Nevertheless, she was also the voice of reason and comfort.

“Tenzin!” Pema had snapped at her husband the minute the Avatar left the room.

“Did you know about this?” Tenzin demanded, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes, I did, and I’m glad she came and told me first, because your response was ridiculous!”

“How was my response ridiculous?” Tenzin asked. “She’s pregnant, Pema! She’s not ready for that kind of responsibility!”

“Maybe not right now, but she can be when the time comes.” Pema furrowed her brow and kept a stoic face. This woman was the only person in the world besides his ex-girlfriend who could stop him in his tracks and make him question his motives.

“A teenage girl, who just so happens to be the Avatar, isn’t in the right mindset to raise a child. She already had so much to deal with and she must have known what could happen when she participated in such a…an adult act!” The poor man just couldn’t be blunt with that subject.

“But do you really think she needed to hear everything you just scolded her for, Tenzin? Do you really think so?” She paused and put her hands on her hips. “Because something tells me that that teenage girl has already thought and worried about everything you just told her. When she came to me, she was in tears, because she already knew just how deep she was.”

Tenzin reigned himself back for a moment. Korra had been crying? That was always shocking to hear. No matter how dire things got, Korra remained strong, and when she did cry it took a lot of prying and patience for her to shed just one tear. Up until now he had been the only one to see her let her hair down and lay her feelings on the ground. He should have guessed this turn of events would have upset her, but he hadn’t really thought about it. Korra had been so quiet when he spoke –well, yelled- at her, that he wouldn’t have guessed she felt all that bad for her actions. Then again, he wasn’t exactly thinking of her when he was yelling at her.

“You know, she probably stayed quiet because she knew you were going to let her have it,” Pema growled. “You’re the only person she’d allow to do such a thing, because she respects you. But I think you stepped a little out of line.”

Tenzin was beginning to see where his wife was coming from. “Where in that conversation did I step out of line?”

“Let’s see; saying that child wouldn’t get the love it needed.”

“She’s far too busy to care for a child!”

“You know she would try, just like any other women in this situation!” Pema barked. “And then you went and compared her to your father and the other Avatars.”

Tenzin allowed his eyebrows to pinch upward and his eyes to scrape the floor. Had he really said that? Surely he hadn’t. He always told Korra to never compare herself to the previous Avatars; that she would find her own way. Anger must have really gotten the better of him. “I…did say that, didn’t I?”

Pema stood stubbornly at the doorway with her hands on her hips and a pout on her face. She knew she was going to win this argument; it was just a matter of when Tenzin was ready to surrender. From the looks of it, he was slowly coming down off of his high chair and cooling down.

“Well, she…” Tenzin wanted to keep his anger- he felt like it was called for. Yet he also knew he should calm down and think more rationally, because when he wasn’t in a rational state of mind, he tended to say things he didn’t mean. Plus, he knew his wife was right. He let his angry voice go down a few octaves to let Pema know he was getting better. “She still acted irresponsibly…”

“I know.” Pema sighed, allowing some of her irritation to simmer down along with her husband’s. “And she knows that. And under most circumstances I would say it would be right to punish her, but you know she’s already doing that for us.”

“I suppose you’re right…” The airbender’s rage was beginning to quell.

“And she’s going to have a lot to deal with from here on out,” Pema reminded him. She walked over to her husband’s side and sat down. She leaned over and placed a gentle hand on his broad shoulder.

“Well…” Tenzin tried to search for his next choice of words. “I’m still not happy about any of this.”

“I know, dear.” Pema rubbed his shoulder. “No one is.”

Tenzin pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a loud sigh. “And what about Mako?” He was hoping he could find some sort of relief in all of this- for Korra’s sake and his. Maybe the level-headed firebender could provide just that.

Pema frowned and looked down at her hand on the airbender’s shoulder. She knew he wouldn’t like what she had to say. “He…We don’t know yet.”

“Did she tell him?” Tenzin eyed his wife with concern.

“Yes…but it sounds like he didn’t receive the news too well.”

The airbending master looked down at his lap, trying to decipher the line between anger and sympathy. Tenzin wanted to go off on his student for making such a poor choice. He wanted to blow up at her and give her a lecture- the whole nine yards of it. He could scold her until the flying cows came home about how she should have waited until she was married and how irresponsible she was. But he knew that it would get them nowhere. What stopped him even more though was how much pain she must have already been in over everything. As much as he wanted to yell, he also had a part of him that wanted to console his student. No punishment could possibly compare to whatever turmoil she was enduring now.

“And how did she feel about that, do you know?” he asked calmly.

“She said she was fine.”

“That means she’s anything but fine,” Tenzin answered quickly. Korra wasn’t too difficult to read. Granted, he couldn’t always tell what was going on in her mind, but he was pretty quick to pick up on her general moods; whether she was trying to hide them or not.

“I had a feeling.” Pema removed her hand from Tenzin’s shoulder and replaced it with her head.

They both sat in silence for a long time before Tenzin sighed. “You know,” he started, “I didn’t think we would have to worry about this sort of thing until Jinora hit her teenage years.”

“Just think,” Pema smiled, “we’ve got four more kids to talk to about this sort of thing.”

Tenzin’s face paled, all of his anger erased from his mind.

\--

Pema had later informed him that she found Mako in Korra’s room. He had been at her bedside, and had basically come to Korra’s rescue. Even though Mako and Korra had messed things up, Mako still wanted to try and put Korra back together after she fell to pieces. The firebender would have liked to speak with Tenzin, but Pema had advised him against it.

Tenzin was thankful. Not only because Mako was finally a part of the picture, but because any more excitement would have given him a heart attack. He would have hated to go to the Spirit world and have his father ask how he died. “Teenagers…” That would have had his father in stitches.

It had been three days since Korra and Tenzin had spoken. The reason for the lack of interaction wasn’t an acceptable one. Truthfully, he had been busy with work, but other than that he really just didn’t know how to approach the young woman. Normally he would have just walked up to her and started talking. However, he was tender with this sort of thing. He wasn’t very comfortable with talk of…expecting and sex. Even if he had been a father four times over and had dealt with a pregnant wife, he still wasn’t graceful in those regards. He could work with Pema, but Korra was a completely different rodeo.

If this wasn’t enough, Korra had been avoiding him. He only saw her at dinner, but she barely touched her food and excused herself before he could object. She had even been conducting her own training; or so he had figured out when he saw her out of his office window one evening. He noticed that her training seemed more focused and solid. Her movements were strong; his only complaint being that they appeared to be a bit rigid and flat-footed. Then again, he supposed she hadn’t been feeling light on her feet as of late.

The airbender knew this strain between them couldn’t continue. He had to make things right with her and help her in any way he could. So one morning, bright and early, he headed towards the meditation platform where he knew she would be. Sure enough, the waterbender was sitting cross-legged with her eyes closed, completely dead to the rest of the world. Tenzin silently eased himself down next to her and assumed the same pose and went quiet. He closed his eyes as well, trying to gather his thoughts before speaking. A few minutes went by and he was just about to say something, but Korra beat him to the punch and spoke her mind. And what she said was the last thing he expected to hear from her.

“I’m not keeping it.”

His grey eyes snapped open in surprise and he turned to look at his student. Korra was still, her eyes closed and her position the same. What she had said didn’t even shake her foundation.

“What?” he asked.

Korra tried her best not to sigh and lose her patience. Apparently, she needed to start elaborating more whenever she revealed big news. Thankfully Tenzin added more to his question so maybe she wouldn’t have to go into deep detail.

“A-are you…” He paused and looked down at the ground. His student seemed very set on this decision. Korra had made her statement very clear, with just the sound of her voice and the way she presented it to him. He didn’t want to press on her any more than he needed to, but he still had to ask this. “Are you sure?”

“Amon is still on the loose,” Korra began. “The Equalists are on the move and I still haven’t finished my airbending training.” Her eyebrows knitted together briefly, but she reminded herself to stay calm. “Mako is with Asami and can barely provide for himself and his brother. Probending is the only way for him to keep them alive. Neither of us can handle a baby right now.” Korra let her voice drop an octave and a sense of defeat raked at her insides. “And besides, I probably wouldn’t be able to love it the way it needs to be loved.”

“That’s not true,” Tenzin said softly. “I think you could be a great mother, given time.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Korra said. “Once I make the appointment, we can put all of this behind us.”

Tenzin’s mind spun like a whirlwind with the new information. He thought about what she had just told him and all that came into play to make such a decision. Then his mind froze on a blaze of fire.

“And what about Mako?” Tenzin asked carefully. “How does he feel about this?”

“Mako is fine with it.” Korra untangled her legs and pushed herself up. “Besides,” she began as she started to walk away from the platform, “it’s my body.”

Korra stopped for a moment and looked over her shoulder at her teacher. She still had so much respect for him; although whatever his answer might be to her next question would not influence her decision in the slightest. “What do you think?”

Tenzin was silent, weighing his words against the facts. His student had obviously put a lot of thought into this. “I think…” He looked over at her with a placid expression, but the melancholy was clear in his cloudy-colored eyes. “…It’s the smart thing to do…”

Korra nodded and continued her walk back to the house.

Tenzin tore his eyes away from her retreating back and looked down at his lap.

He just wondered if his student had thought all of this through- to the last grain of sand.

\--

Numb was probably the most appropriate word to describe Mako as he and his brother traveled up the island’s steps. His body ached from a long day’s work, and the stone steps weren’t making it any easier. He was tired and deflated. Still, he could feel a niggling feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“I can’t believe she’s not keeping it...” Bolin moped to himself.

And that was what was causing Mako’s conscience to squirm. Korra’s decision was like an ear moth eating holes into his brain. He had respected her decision and even told her that he was fine with it. But when he really thought about it, it just didn’t settle quite right.

Initially, Mako had thought her decision would have put him at ease. They had a quick and easy solution; one that would leave no trace of their mistakes behind. Yet, the firebender couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that something was off.

“Don’t bring it up.” Mako turned to his brother. “When you see her, don’t mention anything about the baby.”

“Fine…” Bolin grumped. He had a lot to say, most of which he already said to his brother.

\--

“What do you mean she’s not keeping it?!” Bolin asked in a burst of shock.

“It’s just like I said,” Mako said as he reached into one of the cabinets of their home. He really wanted a glass of water; the walk from the island had really made him thirsty. “She’s not keeping it. She’s got too much stuff on her plate as it is.” He successfully found a glass cup in the very back and pulled it out.

“So? Can’t she still raise a kid and be the Avatar? I mean, it can’t be that hard!” Actually, the earthbender knew it could be that hard, and even more so than he could imagine. He just didn’t want to let this go without a fight.

“It can be that hard.” Mako looked his brother directly in the eyes before returning back to his cup. Mako loved Bolin, and Bolin knew it, but Bolin also knew just how difficult it was for his brother to keep them alive on the streets. The earthbender would always be grateful for everything his brother had done for him to keep him safe, and above all else, happy. “Avatar duties come first for her,” Mako added.

“Well, yeah- I get that!” Bolin whined. “But what’s she gonna do?”

“She’s going to make an appointment with a doctor to…” Mako couldn’t bring himself to say it. He wasn’t sure why; maybe it was because it was too blunt. “Solve the problem.” Mako turned the faucet on and held the cup under it to collect the precious water. He prayed Bolin could put the pieces together; he didn’t want to have to explain to him that Korra was getting an abortion.

Bolin was quiet, his face contorted into one of sheer concern and shock. His green eyes fell to the floor and his muscles tensed. He had never in his wildest dreams thought he would have been so close to such a situation; let alone knowing someone –someone like Korra- who was immediately a part of it.

Someone like Korra…this decision didn’t sound like Korra at all.

“Well what about you?” Bolin took a step towards his brother. “What did you have to say about it?”

Mako, eyes trained on the falling water, quietly turned off the faucet and took the cup out from the sink. He started for his bedroom door, memories in his mind hitting him like earth disks. He hadn’t talked to Korra again once she fell asleep. But he knew that Korra wasn’t going to change her mind. She was going to go through with it- her mind was going to be set in stone about it. And he supposed if it was what she wanted, and if it would make her feel better, then he would just allow her to remain set.

But why did the pit of his stomach tell him otherwise?

“It’s her body.” And with that, he shut the door behind him.

Bolin stood in the middle of the kitchen; more still than he had ever been. His brother’s response had the vibration of a sound declaration. It was finite and it was clear. But Mako was his brother, and Bolin could tell that something else –something in Mako’s voice- betrayed his statement.

\--

But Bolin didn’t want to alienate the waterbender. While he was unhappy with her decision, he was still true to his word about being there for her. Besides, he knew she had been having a hard time. He might as well play along with Mako’s request for normalcy; it seemed that’s all they really wanted. And no matter the situation, Bolin was always happy to see Korra. He figured he could spare some cheerful energy and send some of it her way.

When the duo reached the top of the steps they saw Korra sitting on the steps of the temple entrance. She put on a smile to greet them with, but Mako felt like the smile was off somehow. The waterbender took a few steps to meet the bending brothers half way and greeted them as if nothing ever happened. “Hey guys.”

“Hey Korra,” Mako chimed.

“Heyyy,” Bolin started easily. “What’s for dinner? I’m starved!”

“Oh you know- vegetables.” Korra smirked and looked between the two boys.

Mako quirked a small grin as Bolin groaned. “That’s all well and good, but what about the meat?” He pointed a finger at Korra. “A guy needs his protein!”

“Well, if you can think of any other airbenders who will have you and serve you meat, then you’re more than welcome to go eat dinner with them tonight.”

Bolin kept the ball rolling. “Well maybe I would if this wasn’t the only airbending family.”

“Alright.” Mako pushed his brother forward. “Go inside and eat before you wear out our welcome with your mouth.” He was glad his brother was still treating Korra like one of the guys. It made the atmosphere around them easy to breathe in; just like it had been before all of this started.

Bolin looked over his shoulder and saw that Mako and Korra were looking at him, but hadn’t budged otherwise. The earthbender took this as a polite way of telling him to scram while they talked. Bolin felt like he had a lot to say, but he knew better than to get in too deep with this complicated business Mako and Korra had created. So the young man settled on focusing his thoughts on the fresh food inside; food was so much simpler than life problems, anyway.

Mako turned to Korra with a soft smile, his eyebrows pinched upward in an almost apologetic manner. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine,” Korra chuckled. “Actually, I guess I’m feeling better than fine.” There it was again; that smile that wasn’t hers. It didn’t reach her beautiful icy eyes and make them sparkle. It didn’t light up her entire face. It was just there, like someone had slapped a magnet on a fridge.

“You guess?” he asked, his brow raising and a frown marring his handsome features.

“Yeah, I mean we’ve got a quick fix!” Her voice peaked with enthusiasm, but Mako’s sensitive ears picked up something else. “We can move on and pretend this never happened.”

When Mako looked into her eyes a bit more closely, he realized what it all was. Her smile was forced. Her enthusiasm was forced. Her happy demeanor was forced. She wasn’t fine. She was lying. The decision she had slapped down on the table wasn’t curing her of anything; instead it was acting more as a placebo. She was lying to herself and creating the illusion of thinking everything was better. Just seeing her like this made him feel sick to his stomach; he’d rather see her hurt over something real than setting herself up over something fake. Because once the ground fell out from under her feet, it was going to hurt more than she could ever imagine. And bending that ground back to place wouldn’t be easy.

“Korra,” Mako started off gently, “are you sure you really want to do this?” He made sure his facial features were clear; eyebrows drawn upward, eyes shining and scanning her with concern, and the corners of his mouth hooked into a frown.

“Invite you over to dinner?” She quirked a brow and smirked. “Uh, yeah, I wouldn’t have invited you if I wasn’t sure.”

“No…” Mako sighed. The fact that she had dodged his question more than confirmed his suspicions. “I mean…” He looked away uneasily. He had a hard time saying anything bluntly anymore; a bad habit he didn’t need to be getting into. “I mean about not keeping it.”

Korra’s brows furrowed slightly. “What? Of course I’m sure!” Forced confidence seethed through her teeth. “It’s the smartest thing to do!” She crossed her arms and pouted. She would have figured Mako would have let her make this decision without a lot of hassle, especially since this baby would have encroached upon his probending, finances, and his girlfriend.

“I…” He wanted to speak up. He wanted to admit to her that her decision was a bad one; it was obvious by her behavior how awful it was. But he couldn’t really argue with her, could he? They truthfully were too busy; her with her Avatar duties, and him with probending, work, and Asami. A baby had no place in their lives, especially since their lives were barely intertwined to begin with.

Besides, what could he say to change her mind? It was her body. She would do what she wanted. “I guess you’re right…” he answered in defeat.

“Good, now come on, cool guy.” She smiled; her eyes used to shine when she called him that. “Dinner is getting cold.” But this time, they didn’t.

\--

Dinner passed uneventfully for once; every time the brothers had visited and stayed for dinner, the family bustled with endless energy. Perhaps they still did, but Mako didn’t really notice. His mind was everywhere but the family setting before him. Instead of paying attention to what the children were saying, or what funny antics were being passed around the table, he kept his eyes trained on his food and seldom stole looks from the other around him.

Everything Korra did or said was artificial. Even her eating was strained--which was a site he would never get used to, considering she rivaled his brother in the consumption of food. He wondered if he was the only one who could see through her façade. His question was answered when he glanced over at Tenzin. The airbender was silent and seemed to hold a gloomy aura about him. He ate slowly and seemed absent from most of the idle conversations at the dinner table. Sure, the man could have had a bad day at the office, but considering he was stealing worried looks at Korra, Mako doubted that was the case. Pema seemed calm and chipper as usual, but she was busying herself with her four children and making sure everyone was content, however Mako was sure she had her own thoughts about all of this. Bolin, for the time being, was stuffing his face. Just because everyone else was down, didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy a good meal. And the children were oblivious to the lack of good tidings.

The firebender didn’t feel like he was present. He felt more like he was in a state of limbo, and was just watching what went on around him from a far. If he were to try and touch them, they would slip right through his fingers, and if he were to try and speak, they wouldn’t hear him.

Korra especially.

When dinner was over, everyone departed from the room to do their own thing. The children went off to play and Tenzin and Korra went to go train; Bolin tagging along to watch. Pema had disappeared into the other room to do dishes, and Mako just remained slouched over the table.

The young man was beginning to second guess the decision Korra had made, and second guess his compliance with it. The way Korra was acting wasn’t normal, and it had only started after she said she wasn’t going to keep it. To him it was far worse than the turmoil she had been experiencing beforehand. She was acting so fake and was ignoring the other options. More importantly, she was ignoring the consequences and ignoring what she really wanted.

But did Korra really know what she wanted? She wanted to make everyone happy, which everyone always warned her that such a task was impossible. Korra knew this, but she still tried her best to please everyone around her. She was so much more enveloped in what everyone else thought and how they needed her. But Korra didn’t allow a moment to herself to think about what she really wanted. Not what she wanted to others, but what she wanted for herself.

She was dreadfully selfless. And it was dreadfully beautiful.

Pema popped her greying head around the corner to see if the firebender was still moping at the table. Sure enough, he was there, as quiet as she had ever seen a person; she would know, having three rambunctious airbending children and a fussy baby. “Are you okay?”

Mako’s head sprang up from his hands and his eyes landed on the woman. “Uh, yeah.” His face gave everything away; he wasn’t okay. But he wasn’t trying very hard to cover it up. In a way, he was hoping that someone would confront him about it, but at the same time he was hoping no one would say anything.

“It’s about Korra, isn’t it?” Pema seemed to have a way with confrontation.

He didn’t respond. Instead, he looked away with a tell-tale face of concern and embarrassed admittance.

Pema sighed and smiled apologetically. “Well, you’re not the only one who’s worried.” She walked through the kitchen doorway and sat down at the low standing table, across from Mako. She rested her chin in her hand, completely prepared to listen. “Tenzin hasn’t been able to focus on much since she decided not to keep it.”

“At first I thought it was going to be okay.” Mako kept his attention focused on the window. “But now I’m not so sure.” He looked down at the table and shook his head. “She’s not acting like herself.”

“Well, this isn’t something you recover from overnight.” Pema folded her hands together on the table, looking down at them, her face dropping. “But you’re right.” Mako looked up at the older woman and waited to see if she would back up his worries. “She made her decision. But I think she’s blocking herself from thinking about the consequences.” Pema looked up and made eye contact with the young bender for a split second before he looked away. “She doesn’t want to think any further because she’s so overwhelmed with everything.” Pema propped her elbows up on the table and rested her chin on her folded hands. “So, she thinks that making a decision that will benefit everyone and ignoring how she might feel later will solve all of these problems.”

“It’s not the right choice.” A crease was worried between Mako’s brows. “Maybe other girls could make a decision like this and be okay with it. But Korra…” He paused. “I don’t want to think about how she’ll be after…” He rested his cheek against his fist and gazed out the window. “And it worries me.”

Pema smiled knowingly as she brought her hands back down to the table and rested her amber eyes on them. “Then maybe you should tell her that.” She looked up at Mako through her eyelashes, a smile still on her face. “What you think.”

Mako scoffed and looked at Pema like she was crazy. “What I think? How would that help?” Mako shrugged and looked down at the wooden floorboards underneath the table. “It’s her body…” Korra wasn’t one to change her mind so easily, and that would be the argument stopper right there. Once she used that line, he never knew where to go from there.

“It may be her body,” Pema twiddled her thumbs, “but your opinion is more important than you both realize.” Pema glanced up at Mako and waited to see if he would respond. Instead, his amber eyes were locked on her like a target, waiting for her to continue. The fact that he was staring at her meant he had yet to receive this information, and he was intrigued. Pema went on, “This is a big decision to come to on your own, you know? And even though she may have the final say, she could still use all of the support she can get.”

“I don’t know if she’d really like what I have to say.” He wasn’t even sure what he had to say. He wanted to tell her to think really hard about how this might affect her in the long run; not just as a quick fix. He wanted to tell her to stop thinking about the rest of the stupid world, who didn’t appreciate her for all the right reasons, and think about herself for once. He wanted her to stop thinking about him for a split second and consider what she wanted. He wanted her to do whatever she needed to do to come to a solid conclusion to this puzzle, instead of drawing a line straight to the end over all the thick black lines of the maze. He would walk it with her if he had to; if she would let him. Anything to make sure he could see her smile again.

“What I mean to say is don’t go forcing what you want or think down her throat. But it’s good for a person to take things into consideration and know they’re not alone and that others are thinking of them.”

Mako nodded and digested what the nonbender was telling him. It all made sense, but Korra may not take any of what he had to say with ease. She would growl and snarl at him until she had him backed into submission. She didn’t think of it as consideration, but as a force holding her back. But wouldn’t it still mean something if she at least heard it? Even if she scorned him for it and ripped him a new one, she would still have the information in her head. She would still be forced to process what he had told her. And maybe it could force her to think. If she would just think, then he would be okay with it all, regardless of whatever decision she came to at the end of the day.

\--

Mako and Bolin were just about to descend the island’s steps when Korra dropped yet another bombshell on them. “So I’ll see you guys at practice tomorrow?”

“Uh, practice?” Mako’s lips tilted up nervously. She couldn’t be serious.

“Yeah, we got a match in a couple of days and I’ve been behind!” She threw her arms in the air and smiled. She really did want to get back into the arena; no matter what had been going on, she still missed the thrill of bending and hearing the crowd go wild.

“But…” For once Bolin decided he should put in some of his concern. He didn’t like being quiet about any of this, anyway. “You’re pregnant.”

“So?” Korra pouted.

“I don’t think so.” Mako shook his head and turned to face her. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be playing out there in your condition.” He made sure to give her a stern face. As team captain it was his job to ensure the safety of his teammates. There was no way he was going to let Korra put herself or the baby in danger just because Korra wanted to play in a probending match.

Korra looked taken aback and an icy fire ignited in her eyes. “What does my condition have to do with probending!?”

Mako’s eyes darkened in warning. “You could get hurt, Korra.”

“We get hurt in probending matches all the time!” she wailed.

"But...no one plays while they're pregnant." Bolin looked at his older brother for back up. "Do they?" his voice piqued with interest.

"No," Mako growled, keeping his eyes on Korra. "Listen, it's better to play it safe instead of putting yourself and the baby in danger!"

Korra’s face contorted in rage. “Look, it’s not like I’m keeping it; it’ll be gone in a few days!” she growled at the both of them. “So what’s the point of playing it safe if it’s not staying?” She glowered at the two bothers as they dropped their heads and stared at the ground. “Whatever,” she huffed, flipping her hair. “I’ll see you guys at practice tomorrow.”

Both of the brothers remained quiet, Mako in fumes and Bolin dejected, as Korra stormed back inside. Bolin looked over at Mako. “Talk about mood swings.”

“Seriously.”

\--

Days of practice went by and Mako and Korra fought. Mako would always start off the argument with how she shouldn’t be playing; that it wasn’t safe. And Korra would launch back and glare at him; he swore if those eyes could shoot fire, he would have been dead already. Although they argued, and she always won, Mako couldn’t rid himself of the bothersome feeling he had held within himself for nearly a week. Her decision to play was worrisome, but her decision to abort the baby was far more concerning.

Korra seemed so adamant about playing that he began to second guess his concerns. Maybe Korra really had thought things through and was completely prepared to give up this child to the spirit world. Still, the team captain could see that same forced demeanor in everything his waterbender did. Granted, it was a little bit harder to see when she was bending. However, he could tell by how flatfooted and distracted she was that her head wasn’t in the game. It was still on the baby, which told him she truly hadn’t thought things through.

Her health didn’t boost his confidence in letting her play, either. She still looked pale and thin; her eating habits had improved, but once again, it was only because she forced herself to eat- and she didn’t eat much. The bags under her eyes were still present and dark; sleep didn’t come to those who worried themselves sick.

Despite all of their arguing and fighting, Mako still couldn’t bring himself to tell her what was on his mind and how he felt about her decision. He kept finding reasons to prolong the confrontation; maybe he was worrying too much and being paranoid about how she was acting. But then again, Pema and Tenzin had noticed, too, so he couldn’t be the only one.

The one time he did gather up the nerve to talk to her, Korra had assumed he was going to chew her out again for participating in the upcoming match; she had abruptly left the room and left a trail of silence behind her.

Mako had come to bitterly accept that he couldn’t stop Korra from playing; she was far too stubborn and angry with him and everyone else to listen.

Besides…if she wasn’t going to keep it, then what was the point of sitting out of a match?

It still didn’t sit right. But he figured if he let her play, then maybe he could reason with her later.

But maybe he was too scared to say anything. There was so much to be scared of. So much that it tended to keep a tight lock on his lips and a ball and chain on his ankles. He couldn’t find the key to unlock himself from this paralyzing fear.

\--

When the night of their probending match came, Korra was still angry with Mako, and Mako was still worrying over her decision. Bolin tried his darndest to be optimistic- which wasn’t very hard for the earthbender. Korra played along, but her irritation with Mako was still clear in everything she did. Mako didn’t respond to his brother’s enthusiasm; instead, he brooded and kept to himself, unless he had to address them as a team.

“Are we ready to kick some Hog Monkey butt?!” Bolin tried boosting the team’s moral.

“You know it!” Korra smiled. “I can’t wait to get back out there and show them what we’re made of.”

Mako sat on the bench and watched his brother and their waterbending teammate chatter it up. His eyes would flit from Bolin and then to Korra, gaging their actions. Bolin was optimistic and tried his best to keep things positive; he always had. Korra jabbered back to his brother, a smile on her face; her eyes still didn’t glitter. Even when she was supposedly distracted by the game, she was still forcing herself through the motions of accepting what was to come.

“Oh, Boliiiin!” All three Fire Ferrets turned their heads to see a small group of fan girls at the locker room door; all of them smiling big, and some sporting blushes.

Bolin looked between his brother and teammate with a big grin. “If you two will excuse me, I’ve got some fans to entertain.” Suave like the gentleman he was, Bolin casually approached the girls and bid them hello, gently herding them away from the door so that he could join them out in the hallway.

Mako rolled his eyes and repeatedly ran his hands through his hair, but remained tight-lipped. His brother’s flirtatious shenanigans were the least of his worries at this point. However, he made a mental note to chide him later for letting his fan girls anywhere near the locker room before the match.

Korra snuck a quick peek at her favorite firebender before looking back out at the crowd. She was still angry at him, but there was no sense in holding a grudge. She knew he cared, and that was why he was so adamant about keeping her out of the ring. However, his worries were senseless if she wasn’t keeping the baby. She didn’t understand why he was so concerned. It’s not like he wanted to keep it any more than she did. But it didn’t matter to her; the abortion date was set less than a week from today.

The waterbender plastered a smile on her face and willed herself to play nice with her friend. Besides, being on bad terms with him right then would only mess up their game play on the field.

“You’re gonna mess up your hair if you keep doing that, hot shot.” Korra smiled as she placed her helmet in the curve of her torso. She was willing to try and be friendly with Mako; she didn’t like fighting with him anymore than he did.

Mako chuckled huskily. “It’s already messy.” He put his hands on his knees and rocked himself up off of the bench. He took his helmet into his hands and looked into the protective eye shield at his reflection for a moment. He looked up at Korra; she was still trying to offer him the friendliest smile she could. He was glad she wasn’t hostile with him at the moment- and it had nothing to do with how it would affect them on the playing field. But it meant that if she was in a slightly better mood, then maybe he could talk more calmly with her. He wouldn’t feel at ease until he got her to quit the match and think.

Fat chance.

“I still don’t think you should be doing this,” Mako said; for once he didn’t break eye contact with her. He only wished she could see how much he didn’t want her to do this.

“I still don’t understand why.” She furrowed her brows and tried to control her voice. She hated fighting with him, but sometimes she felt like he made it hard for her on purpose. “Besides, if I don’t play, then we have to forfeit.” Korra slipped her helmet on and turned to face the arena. “And if that happens, then you and Bolin lose a paycheck.”

Mako’s eyes widened, shock and anger slowly building in his chest like a buzzard wasp nest. “Is that what this is about? Korra,” Mako had to bite his tongue to keep his anger from pouring out like a gushing waterfall, “money has nothing to do with any of this!”

Korra whipped her head around and gave Mako and striking glare. “If money has nothing to do with it, then how are you and Bolin going to survive?”

Mako wanted to scream. He didn’t want her or the baby to get hurt just because he and his brother needed extra cash. He could easily support him and his brother with what he earned at the power plant. Well, maybe he would struggle a bit, but they’d manage. It was one thing if Korra was just playing for the fun of it and to spend time with the brothers. Now there was a baby involved, and she was using any kind of excuse she had to play and help him and his brother make extra cash.

Begrudgingly enough, the firebender had to bite the insides of his mouth when sinking his teeth into his tongue didn’t work. Mako knew what she said was straight from the heart; it wasn’t an excuse. It was probably one of the driving forces behind her wanting to play. The other forces being she missed the game, and also wanted to try and return to a sense of normalcy. He could appreciate all of those, but it didn’t make it right.

“Korra, I really-“

The audience began to roar as the probending announcer began riling the crowd through his microphone. It was nearly impossible to hear what he was saying; the audience was going wild and their pandemonium drowned out Shiro’s rambling.

Bolin darted back into the room, nearly stumbling over his own feet. Korra turned towards the open arena while Mako took a step towards her. He hesitated, looking between the crowded stadium and then at his teammate’s back. He had to try one last time. “Korra-”

“We’ve got a match to play,” Korra mumbled and walked towards the platform. “And you can’t stop me.”

Oh, but how he wished he could.

\--

Into the second round all three members of the Fire Ferrets knew things weren’t looking up for them. And they didn’t need Shiro Shinobi’s constant play by play to know it.

Their minds were anywhere but the game. Mako struggled to block and evade the onslaught of elements from the opposing team; he could barely get a counter attack in edgewise. Korra was flat-footed and slow. All of her attacks were predictable and her usual flexibility wasn’t up to speed with the other competing team. The only one who was performing remotely fine was Bolin, but even he was thrown off his game by his teammate’s sluggish participation.

“Looks like the Fire Ferrets are having a tough time keeping up with the Hog Monkeys. If these ferrets want to win against these monkeys then they better have a trick up their sleeve.”

Korra got knocked back into zone three, while the brothers were knocked back into zone two. The Hog Monkeys were given the green light to move into their territory, and Mako knew things were looking bleak. He unleashed a barrage of fire on the opposing team’s water bender, but the bender hosed Mako’s head down. The former street kid had no time to try and shake the water off; instead he shuffled from one foot to the next to dodge the next slew of attacks.

Bolin was managing to hit the others players with all that he had, however he struggled missing their onslaught of attacks. He went from being dowsed, to heated by fire, and then slugged in the gut with earth disks. He cringed with every attack he took; today just wasn’t his day.

Korra was growing frustrated with herself. She cursed herself every time she got hit, wondering why she couldn’t dodge their attacks as well as she used to. When she tried to dodge one hit, she wound up getting clipped by another and when she was able to throw an attack, the other competitors moved out of the way with ease. She was getting so irritated by the flurry of attacks that she was losing concentration and her pace was slowing. She could feel the heat rising in her face and her jerky movements were a tell-tale sign that her anger was growing. However, whenever Korra got angry, she often missed what was going on all around her. She didn’t even see the earthbender stomp a disk out of the ground and send it flying her way.

The disk made contact with her upper abdomen and it knocked the air and anger completely out of the Fire Ferret’s waterbender. She could have sworn everything went white for a few seconds before the brunt force of the earth disk sent her shocked body flying backwards off the edge of the ring and into the drink below.

The hard surface of the water slapped her, bringing on a stinging pain to her body. The cold water managed to reawaken her senses enough to where she could open her eyes and see through the muggy drink. Panic began to rise inside of her as she realized there was no air in her lungs to hold her until she reached the surface. The waterbender tried to summon all of her power to propel herself upward, but her strength was weak from shock.

Mako and Bolin continued to fight in the second zone; their minds on Korra, but their eyes glued on their opponents. They had seen her get hit and called out to her, but by the time they had she’d fallen off the edge. They didn’t have time to worry about her into great detail; they still had a team of Hog Monkeys on their backs.

Mako threw a fist of fire and listened for the platform to take Korra back up to the locker room. He listened and listened and listened for what seemed like forever, but the sound never came. His fears were confirmed by the announcer.

“Hold on folks, it seems as though the Avatar has yet to resurface!”

A worried murmur washed over the crowd as people stood in the seats to get a glimpse at where Korra had fallen. The water was still; all sign of life underneath the filmy surface was gone.

Mako and Bolin fought the desperate urge to turn around and look for themselves, but their opponents were taking full advantage of this opportunity to throw everything they had at the distracted Fire Ferrets.

Korra emerged from the water, gasping for the sweet air around her; it didn’t matter if it smelled like sweat and popcorn, air was air and that’s all she needed.

“And the Avatar is okay! We’ll be seeing her again in the next round- if Mako and Bolin can pull themselves together that is!”

Korra bitterly swore; she really didn’t appreciate the loud commentary at the moment. The pain in her abdomen throbbed and reminded her of its presence. She immediately brought her hand to her stomach and a wave of panic shot through her like a firebender’s lightning.

The baby!

Before she could think much further into it, her vision started to fuzz. Willing her arms and legs to move, she pushed herself out of the water and onto the concrete platform before taking the ride back up to the locker room.

The pain in her stomach was difficult to ignore. She was leaning over with her hands on her knees, trying to sum up what was going on in the ring, but her focus wasn’t there. Once she reached the locker room she stumbled and caught herself on the wall. She could feel sweat beading from the top of her head, provoking her to take off her helmet. Her vision continued to fade in and out for a few moments as he weakly looked towards the arena. Her teammates looked like hopping blobs from where she stood.

Soon her vision started going purple and she tried her hardest to blink it back. Then it went to blue; she started lowering herself and putting more pressure on the hand against the wall. The minute she started seeing black she knew it was too late. She collapsed; the last thing she heard was Shiro Shinobi calling attention to her distress.

\--

Mako had been relieved when he heard Shiro announced that Korra had come back up out of the water. He had been relieved enough to get somewhat focused on the match, now that Korra was no longer playing—even if it was just for a few minutes.

Not even a minute later, his relief went out the window.

“Uh-oh, folks! It seems as though the Avatar has passed out in the changing room!”

Mako whirled his head around, not even caring about the water that smacked him in the back of the head. Korra was lying unconscious on the floor in the locker room.

“Medics are on their way up to the changing room now as we speak.”

Mako looked over at his brother, who was also looking at him for answers. They both knew they should keep playing; everyone would expect them to do so. Plenty of people had passed out before and the teams kept playing. But they both doubted that anyone had passed out from a disk to the gut while being pregnant.

Mako looked at the team, who was slowing down on their attacks; concern was starting to wind into them as the Fire Ferrets quit throwing attacks, but they were still on their toes as if to strike. He looked between the team, Bolin, and the locker room; worry for Korra building in his stomach with every second that passed. He knew she would be upset if he dropped the match, but they were going to lose without her anyway with the way they had been playing. Having her wellbeing on their minds wasn’t going to propel them to victory. But he wasn’t worried about that; he was more worried about her state of being, as well as the baby’s.

One last time, he looked from Korra’s unconscious body and then to his brother’s waiting gaze. Still bouncing on his toes, anxious to run to his teammate’s aid, Mako quickly ripped off his helmet and threw it to the ground. “Forfeit!” he announced loudly before he and his brother darted off towards the edge of the ring.

“It appears the Fire Ferrets have thrown the match in favor of aiding Avatar Korra. I admire their nobility, but this will cost them!”

They waited impatiently for the platform to meet them, but they both jumped ahead onto the approaching platform before it even made it to the arena. They lunged off of the moving elevated floor before it met the changing room and rushed to their fallen teammate’s side. The medics had yet to arrive.

“Korra!” both boys cried as they kneeled down next to the Avatar’s side. They both tried calling out to her, but she didn’t stir.

The door to the locker room slammed open and Tenzin and Asami came in, worried looks on their faces. “Oh my gosh, is she okay?” Asami knelt down next to Mako.

“I don’t know, but she’s not waking up!” Mako bleated.

Asami held her hand over Korra’s mouth and waited for a moment. “She’s still breathing.”

“Oh, thank goodness,” Tenzin sighed.

Bolin got up and ran to the door and looked out into the hallway. “Medics are here!”

The team of medics rushed in to Korra’s side. Tenzin’s face radiated anger as they gently squeezed between the concerned young people and lifted Korra onto a stretcher. “What in blue blazes took you all so long to get here!?” he barked. The medical team winced, knowing there was no excuse and knowing full well not to mess with a councilman when he was upset. “Honestly, the boys were on the probending field and they still managed to get here before you did!” the men ignored the airbender as they lifted the Avatar and marched out the door towards the infirmary.

Mako and Bolin were about to follow, but Tenzin stopped them. “You boys go ahead and get changed.” They were about to protest, but the older man stopped them. “They won’t let you in to see her right away- they have to make sure she’s okay first.” He then proceeded to sigh, “I suppose I need to call her physician; no need to let anyone else in on her condition.” The airbender walked out of the room, leaving the three teens alone.

Both brothers flocked to their lockers and began tearing off articles of clothing, not even paying mind to the girl in the room.

“Wait, condition?” Asami asked aloud.

Mako froze; he hadn’t told Asami about Korra. Truth be told, he wasn’t even going to tell her, since Korra was planning on aborting the child anyway. Mako had never so badly wanted to disappear into his probending uniform. “I-uh…she-”

“Is still sick with the flu!” Bolin jumped in.

“She’s still sick and you let her play?” Asami looked at her boyfriend with disbelief.

Now it was Mako’s turn to defend him. “Look, I tried telling her to sit this one out, but she wouldn’t listen!” He reached into his locker for his jacket and scarf. “You know how she gets; she’s stubborn.” He was going to leave it at that; now was not the time to tell his girlfriend that he knocked up her best friend.

“Yeah- she was really, uh, determined to play tonight.” Bolin backed up his brother’s story as he slipped on his shirt.

“Then you should have just forfeited before the match!”

Oh, Mako knew he should have. He put a lot of thought into each play, even if it meant not playing the match at all. But he knew Korra would have had his head if he had done that. Now he realized he would rather her have his head than her or the baby hurt. He swore himself up and down for it and he didn’t need his girlfriend adding on the flack he was already applying to his burns. “I know, I know!” He looked at the Sato heir with earnest in his eyes. “But I can’t go back and fix that!” It had been his mantra ever since he found out he was going to be a father; even before that, when he realized he had cheated on Asami. “Right now, we just need to make sure she’s okay.”

Begrudgingly, Asami accepted this; he was right and there was no point in getting on his case when he was already so worried.

Once the boys were changed they made their way to the infirmary. The medics had gotten Korra settled in a bed and peeled off most of her probending uniform, leaving only her tunic and pants. Tenzin was talking privately with one of the medics, telling them that he was having Korra’s doctor come out to the arena to look after her. The staff seemed puzzled by this statement, as they handled every injured player in the ring, but they accepted Tenzin’s demands and left the teacher and friends with Korra.

Mako took a seat on the stool next to Korra. He leaned forward on his knees and looked her over from head to toe. Aside from her lack of color and thinness, she looked as if she were sleeping peacefully and would wake up at a moment’s notice; this much brought him relief. He was sure that Korra would be just fine physically; he didn’t even want to think about her mental state of being.

Asami stood in the corner of the room, observing her friends. She found it strange how Bolin was at the end of the bed, yet Mako was right next to Korra’s side…almost as if Mako and Korra were closer than they appeared. This was no news to her, of course. She knew how close the three of them were, and it wouldn’t surprise her to know that Korra may have favored Mako’s company rather than Bolin’s. Still, the way her boyfriend watched the waterbender unnerved her. She had dated Mako long enough to know how to read his eyes. Even from across the room she saw brimming conviction, worry, and guilt in his amber eyes. It was something she had never seen before in him.

The nonbender crossed her arms over her chest and looked down at the floor. She knew; it didn’t take a profit to see it. Mako liked Korra and Korra liked Mako. At first Asami hadn’t known how to feel about it. She had assumed that Mako was with her because he liked her more than Korra. So she rolled with it and tried her best not to talk about Mako around Korra; she noticed Korra avoided talking about him as well. But in the past few months she saw a change in the way they looked at each other. It was like they knew something that no one else knew; playful smiles and glinting, bright eyes. Yet at the same time there was a hint of awkwardness between the two of them; she couldn’t imagine why. Around the same time Mako had started acting differently around Asami. Things were already getting stale even before hand, but it was like he was walking on egg shells around her.

Her stomach burned at the thought of possibly having to let him go. He assured her that he liked her and still went on dates with her, although the past week or two had been lonely without his presence. She could have sworn, though, that the sparkle in his eyes he used to have when he looked at her was no longer there. In fact, she thought she saw that sparkle appear when he looked at Korra. Still, her firebending boyfriend hadn’t said a word about it, and continued to go on with his relationship with the nonbender as if nothing else was distracting him. And he would smile for her; a smile that was meant for someone else.

\--

She was aware of the noises around her; voices, if she was correct. What those voices were saying, she wasn’t quite sure. Maybe if she tried listening a little harder then she would be able to understand them.

“So she’ll be alright then?” It sounded like Tenzin.

“Yes, yes, she’ll be fine.” That voice sounded familiar too, but she hadn’t heard it in a while…Doctor Tai?

What was Doctor Tai doing here? They hadn’t called her or made an appointment. It wasn’t like anyone was sick or hurt…

Her eyes snapped open and the room spun from the sudden action. She ignored this, her thoughts immediately flitting to the pain in her abdomen and the being inside of her. The baby! Is it alright?!

She sat up, forgetting about the voices around her. The room started twirling once again and she felt light headed. Just as she was about to fall back, she felt a firm hand on her face. She looked over to see Mako at her bedside. She looked around the rest of the room to see Tenzin, Bolin, Asami, and Dr. Tai.

“Thank goodness, you’re awake,” Tenzin sighed.

“I told you she’d be fine.” The doctor scowled.

Korra brought her hand to the tender spot on her abdomen and winced. “W-what happened?”

“You were hit with an earth disk and passed out.” Asami approached the bed, giving her friend a look full of genuine concern. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine…” Korra didn’t even try to look cheerful. She felt anything but fine. She fisted the material of her shirt, her eyes downcast.

Tenzin noticed Korra’s distress and turned to Asami. “Miss Sato, would you mind calling Pema for me? I called her earlier to tell her what had happened and that we’d be home late.” He smiled. “I’m sure she would like some peace of mind.”

“Sure thing.” Asami smiled and stepped out of the room to find a phone.

When he was sure Asami was out of ear shot, he closed the door and turned to Korra. “Are you really feeling alright?” Concern dripped from his voice like a leaky faucet and his eyes gleamed with the same worry.

Korra thought, taking a deep breath and feeling the pain shoot through her again. Physically, she was. She’d been through far worse than this. But her mind was focused on the life inside of her and what may have happened. Then it hit her that she was concerned for the very being she was going to abort.

She wasn’t supposed to feel that way.

“…No…” she said so quietly that no one else but Mako must have heard. He rubbed her back, trying to comfort her.

“I sure wouldn’t be if I took an earth disk to the gut,” Dr. Tai stated rather bluntly. She made her way over to the counter top where her papers were. “But you’ll be fine.” She smiled to herself. “You passed out due to dehydration and fatigue. The earth disk just sent your body into shock- couldn’t cope with the sudden onset of pain when it didn’t have the energy to do so.”

Korra blinked slowly, trying to make sense of what the doctor had said. So because of all the stress, she had managed to neglect eating, drinking, and sleeping- which in turn caused her to pass out. That was all fine and dandy, but she heard no talk of her baby in that report.

“…What about…” Korra tried to find the words; she wasn’t supposed to care. Yet she did. “The baby…is it…”

“Baby is fine,” Dr. Tai stated. “The disk clipped you in your upper abdominal region- nowhere near the womb.” The doctor glared at her. “Though it was very foolish to play in a probending match in your condition.” She slipped the papers into her bag and closed it. She turned to Tenzin with a placid face. “Make sure she drinks plenty of fluids and gets lots of rest.”

“Thank you, doctor.” Tenzin bowed to the physician as she exited the room.

The world was spinning again; Korra cursed herself. She had thought she had gotten it to stand still with her decision to abort the baby, yet now she was questioning herself. Why had she been so concerned for its wellbeing? A woman wasn’t supposed to feel that way if she was just going to get rid of it, anyway.

“Maybe you should go ahead and lay down for a little bit, before you go home,” Mako suggested, helping the compliant Avatar to lie back down.

“Yeah, that was some serious stuff.” Bolin’s thick brows pinched upward. “You had us all worried.”

“Sorry,” she mumbled and closed her eyes. Her brain kept pulsated a headache and her stomach churned with nausea. But that wasn’t what kept her from resting. Instead, it was that festering question as to why she was so worried for her unborn child.

And then it hit her that maybe she hadn’t thought things through. That maybe she hadn’t considered how she would feel once the baby was gone and out of her life. How was it that through all of this strife she had been through, heartache and stress of all kinds, she had still come to accept this child as her own?

Moreover, when did her heart decided that she may actually want to keep it?

She finally thought it through to the last grain of sand.

And that last grain made all the difference.


	6. The Eleventh Hour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He still wasn't ready for any of this.

The lightning tore through the sky, leaving roaring thunder in its wake. The dark clouds hid the ongoing fight of nature from the bright city below, but the threat of rain was still among the utopia's dwellers. An easy-going breeze was flitting through the streets and dancing with the ocean, but so far the storm it brought remained dormant, and the city still stayed alive with the droning sounds of cars and idle chatter.

However, at the island, the rustle of thousands of trees and the sound of the water slapping the shores were all that could be heard. Everyone was inside and had retired for the night, completely content with letting nature throw its tantrum.

She should have been sleeping, but instead Korra's thoughts were racing to the night of the match. Each little moment replayed over and over again in her mind, but none of those things fazed her. What did faze her was the panic she'd felt when she woke up in the clinic. The first thought which came to mind when she started coming to:

The baby! Is it alright?!

Her eyes had completely snapped open- and she was sure everyone else in the room thought she was startled and in shock from what had happened. But no, instead she was worried about the very being she was going to abort in a few days. Last time she checked, mothers who were planning on aborting their babies weren't supposed to be worried for the source of their problem.

Even now, Korra found herself thinking about the child's wellbeing in between her fretting thoughts. What if the doctor was wrong? What if the disk clipped lower than Dr. Tai thought? Maybe there's something wrong with it now because of it. Finally, she would start feeling disappointed in herself, and kicking herself for playing in that stupid match. Then, after she thought of these things, she would go back to how she shouldn't be thinking about it. She should be completely indifferent. It didn't matter if it got hurt if she was just going to get rid of it in a few days, right?

The doctor had told her to keep any eye on things just to be sure everything was fine. Korra was also told to get bed rest and drink plenty of fluids, and try to get food into her system. But Korra couldn't sleep; she wound up staying up all night, waiting for a tell-tale sign of her baby perishing. She waited to feel pain, but she didn't; she waited to find blood, but she didn't. Instead, all was quiet and normal. The only pain the waterbender felt was her aching joints, pounding head, and the spot where the disk had hit her.

Still, she kept double checking on everything. And once she was finished, her mind did a complete three-sixty and went back to her previous decision. She would abort it and they could move on with their lives. Once it was gone, all would be right with their worlds again.

But why was it that when she thought she lost it, her world nearly stopped?

Korra brought her arm up and rested it over her eyes. Now she was back to square one on what she wanted to do about this predicament. Once again she was clueless and racked with confusion. She thought about going through with her original plan, but when she did she felt a knot form in her stomach, and she could have sworn tears started prickling in her eyes.

That wasn't right. She was supposed to be placid about all of this. The smart thing to do was to get rid of the child. She had too much to handle and so did Mako and everyone else around them. No one could be bothered with a child. So if it was the smart thing to do, then why did it feel so wrong?

Korra backtracked and thought about how she had come to her first decision. She had come to it because she was desperate and confused. She didn't know what to do or how to handle it. So in her fit of confusion and fear, she threw down the problem and left it like she would have with a lot of things that frustrated her. But it made her feel guilty- she never backed down from a challenge and that's what she had done. But still, it was the smart thing to do, wasn't it? Even Tenzin agreed with her, and so did Mako- albeit he had acted oddly about it afterward.

She ran another check on her body as she went through another bout of turmoil. She still didn't feel pregnant- which didn't ease her fears in terms of the baby's condition. Hesitantly, Korra slinked her hand forward and rested in on her lower abdomen. Sure enough, there was a protruding bump there. Nothing felt wrong; although it was wrong that it was there to begin with.

She found herself regretting it less and less.

Korra released an inaudible breath and closed her eyes, running her options through her head again. She wasn't going to be able to relax until she got this settled.

Go through with the abortion: everyone can move on. Korra could continue her training and take down Amon, as well as participate in probending. Mako could keep playing and working to support him and his brother, and date every guy's ideal girl. Tenzin and his family wouldn't have another mouth to feed, and Korra could avoid the city's disappointment. It seemed like the perfect plan.

Keep it: she would stay pregnant, and the entire city would know and tear her down for it. She would have to stop pursing Amon to take care of a baby, which would allow the masked man time to really mess things up. Probending would have to stop- at least for a while, anyway. And she imagined her training would have to stop, as well, leaving the rest of the world without a realized Avatar. Then Tenzin would have to put up with her, or even send her back home where she would get nothing done. Mako…well, she wasn't sure what he would do. She guessed he would have to quit probending and possibly break up with Asami. The idea made her feel sick.

Adoption: well…it was an option, but not one she had really thought of much. She could go through with the pregnancy and then give the baby to a family who would give it all of the love it would need, and she could move on with life.

The idea of giving up the baby made her heart clench. She knew it was too late. She was already attached. The idea of someone else raising her child was unbearable- not when she was capable of doing it herself, even if it would be hard.

It was then that she came to the inevitable conclusion, the one she thought she would never come to: She was going to keep it.

Perhaps it was going to be the most selfish thing she would ever do. She would put a halt to everything she was already obligated to, just to bring a child into the world and raise it. Mako would have to put his life on hold, as would she. She may even have to go back to the South Pole, because Tenzin definitely shouldn't have to put up with her and a baby. The city would have to wait and pray Amon wouldn't take a step out of his lair, and the Equalists would continue holding rallies. She would have an entire world disappointed in her. But the disapproval of everyone else almost didn't matter anymore. She would be more disappointed in herself if she didn't follow her heart. The baby would have to learn how to grow up with having the Avatar as a mom, and she was well aware that her status could put this child –any of her future children- in danger. But many Avatars before her started families and were just fine. Even if she was starting earlier than most, she still had the same odds as the others- airbending or no airbending.

Decision set, Korra sighed and rolled out of bed. Gingerly picking her parka up off the floor, she said out loud, "Looks like you'll be sticking around for a while..."

She knew, the minute she addressed it, it was all over from there. "Come on." Korra slipped her parka on. "We got to go tell your dad."

Sneaking out of her room at this hour and in this kind of weather was easy. The rain always made everyone drowsy and the noise of the thunder always lulled many to sleep; she barely even had to tiptoe her way outside. She called for Naga, who had decided sleeping in the Flying Bison stables was much nicer than sleeping in her master's tight quarters. The Polar Bear Dog came to her call, giving her an odd look as she approached. The oversized hybrid was no stranger to her owner's late night masquerades, though she found it odd that she would want to venture out when she had been so depressed.

Korra offered the animal guide a smile. "Hey girl." She allowed her hands to glide along the animal's head and bring her into a hug. "I know I've been out of sorts lately, but we're gonna fix that." Her eyes brightened a little for her furry friend before she hopped onto her back. "Let's go to the arena."

Without question, Naga bounded off towards the boat docks. The water was warm, but the storm was starting to make the water tremble with rage.

It didn't even strike Korra just how dangerous her short journey could have been. If she hadn't been a waterbender, or waited any longer, then she and her polar bear dog could have been swept away at sea. She didn't realize it until the two of them surfaced on the other side of the bay, but the waves got fiercer and the sky rumbled.

She blinked slowly, and took a deep breath. She would rather deal with a storm than have to tell Mako of her decision. Granted, she knew he would stick by her- but maybe that was what was bothering her.

Selflessly giving up his life to stick by her and the decision she had come to. He wouldn't even have a say in the matter, unless he wanted to back out. But she knew he wouldn't. No- Mako was too loyal and good for that.

They reared the back of the arena, where Korra looked around with caution. Bolin had informed her of a secret entrance in the back. There were a few loose bricks underneath the dumpster next to the backdoor. It was easier to get in if you were an earthbender- which Korra was grateful she was. The Avatar told her companion to seek shelter and she would be back soon. With that, she slipped into the secret entry.

During the day, the halls and rooms would have been brightly lit, but at night the inside of the arena was only lit by the occasional stray light from a hallway. This proved to be no problem for Korra. She knew her way to the brothers' attic like she knew her way around the compound back at the South Pole. She quietly climbed a few stairs and reached the top of the attic where the door stood, firmly closed to outsiders.

She took a deep breath; her nerves were slowly coming back to her, but as she anticipated breaking the news to Mako, she could feel her insides churn. But she was certain. This was the best decision- the only decision she would feel okay with. That certainty was enough to push her fist to knock on the door

No answer.

She figured as much. It was in the middle of the night and both brothers were notorious for being heavy sleepers. If she wanted them up she would have to cause all kinds of racket.

Taking a deep breath, Korra started assaulting the door with her fists. She kept beating the door until she heard footsteps on the other side and a frustrated groggy voice coming closer, "Alright, already!"

Korra bit back a smile; she couldn't decide if she wanted to laugh at Mako's misfortune or be scared about how he would act with her ramming his door at two in the morning. The news she had to deliver wasn't exactly…happy? Whatever the feeling should be, it would still leave the both of them with a lot to think about. It would have been better to tell him in the morning. But her appointment was early and she couldn't wait any longer to tell him.

The door opened to reveal a sluggish Mako. His tattered tank top was riding up on his side and his hair was a mess. His body language was lax and lazy, which complimented his tired amber eyes. Korra couldn't help but smile- even when most people looked ungraceful after sleep, he still looked handsome.

Mako's eyes widened and his eyebrows knitted together. "…Korra." His mind was trying to get out of bed, but it was tangled in the sheets. "What are you doing here?" It didn't take an alert mind to know she was here on important matters. It only took a few more seconds to realize it was matters involving the baby.

"Oh, you know…" Korra's smile was nervous. She wanted to be serious, but the lighthearted part of her didn't want to put too much weight on the situation. "I was just taking Naga out for a walk and thought that maybe I should talk to you about…you know…"

How was she to phrase it?

"Recent…events."

"You were outside in this kind of weather?" Mako's eyebrows rose and the grogginess fled from his voice. Korra knew a scolding was called for, but she wasn't sure she really had the patience for it tonight. She wanted to get straight down to business.

"Yes, I know it was totally stupid. But right now, I'm here, you're in the doorway, and I just really need to talk to you."

"It couldn't have waited until morning?" Mako allowed his stern attitude from before to leak out and be refilled with concern. Korra didn't just show up at their doorstep at two in the morning unless something serious was going on. And 'recent events' basically included everything and anything having to do with the baby.

"Well, tomorrow -err- today is the appointment…" She grabbed her arm, suddenly feeling insecure. "And I felt like I needed to talk to you about some stuff before then."

As surprised as he was, Mako was also pleased. At least now she was willing to talk to him- maybe he could even tell her what he had been feeling about her decision. This would be his last chance to speak up. Yet, he also couldn't help but wonder just what it was she wanted to talk to him about. She had already been so set on that appointment that he didn't think there was anything else to talk about- at least from her side.

"Who is it?" Both Mako and Korra looked around and saw Bolin peering out from his bedroom door. His hair was equally as messy as his brother's- maybe even more, and his eyes were heavy with the sandman's plague.

"It's Korra," Mako answered before turning back to face said guest.

"Oh, hey Korra," Bolin chimed, but still lingered in his doorway. He was always happy to see his water tribe friend, but Spirits how he needed his beauty sleep.

Mako released an inaudible sigh. Whatever Korra had to say, he knew he wouldn't be sleeping well for the rest of the night. "Come on in."

Korra squeezed past Mako and the doorway and proceeded into the living room. The room was sparse as usual, the only thing out of place were a pair of shoes, which she assumed were Bolin's, since Mako was a stickler for keeping the place clean. It was dark, save for the light that was on over the stove; its lights reached to cover most of the living room, except for the dark corners.

The Avatar looked about for a few more seconds before stopping and looking between Mako and then Bolin. She smiled apologetically. "I need to talk to Mako." She paused, allowing another fleeting glance at Mako before turning her attention back to the earthbender. "Alone."

Normally Bolin would have protested, but seeing as his eyes were screaming for sleep, he didn't object. He smiled lazily and saluted to her as he disappeared back into his room. "Got it." He was sure he'd find out what they talked about later anyway.

Korra turned around to face the wall where the stove rested. She looked down and wrung her hands, letting her eyes scan the floor boards as she tried to think of the best way to tell Mako.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Mako asked carefully. He leaned over to the side to try and get a glimpse of her face over her shoulder.

Korra swallowed and turned around to face him. She summoned all of her courage and conviction in one quiet breath. She locked eyes with him, determined to make her statement known and engrave it in stone. Whatever he thought, or whatever he planned on doing afterward didn't matter. He would just have to deal with it. Although it hurt her to think of him throwing away everything for her and this child, she wouldn't let it detour what she had decided.

"…I can't get rid of it."

The sureness of her words made her feel strong, but the minute they were out, she had nothing to do but wait for the firebender's response. She had no strong words to keep the courage rolling; only silence and his gaze. His steady gaze had more power than her bravery- at least in this case. Normally she could beat him at a staring contest and win nearly any argument. But no one was arguing. There was no prize to be won or dignity to protect. It was a life changing decision that neither of them were prepared for; but she was at least willing to give it a go.

"Are…" Mako started, "…are you sure?" His voice was void of disappointment or annoyance. Rather, it was full of concern and caution. This wasn't exactly what he expected to hear at two o'clock in the morning. He hadn't expected to hear it at any time of the day, actually. Korra didn't budge easily on any decisions she made. He supposed she was a person of commitment; rather she was just plain stubborn. He figured she had come to reassert her choice and remind him that the baby would no longer be a problem by the time he woke up in the morning.

But he sure wasn't complaining.

She shyly looked up at him, but quickly looked back down. His eyes had been a little bit more alert at the sound of her statement and his eyes were rapidly flitting around her, as if to try and understand what she had said.

"I thought I could get rid of it. Because it would be the easiest thing to do and the smartest thing, but…after the close call the other day…" She shook her head. "After almost losing it…I just can't do it."

The firebender was quiet. He scanned her entire being to make sure she was sure. Her arms were crossed over her stomach and her head was tilted downward, icy eyes downcast and a frown on her face. She almost looked hurt; like telling him felt like whips against her back. She looked far from comfortable and far from feeling safe and confident- nothing like the Korra he knew. And he wondered if she was happy with this new choice she had presented to him.

No one was happy about the situation they had landed themselves in. Any decision wasn't satisfactory to what they wished they had. She might not be happy with any choice she made, but he at least wanted her to make a choice that could make her happy in the long run. And judging by the cloudy look in her eyes she was firm on her decision.

"I figured I'd tell you first. I just wanted to give you a heads up, since it's your kid." She thought about when she said that to him a few weeks ago and how quickly things had changed since then. She could only imagine how things would change from here on out.

"Right, no- I'm glad you told me." He tried to shake his head out of his reverie and speak back to her. He hadn't done enough talking since all of this began, and it was about time he started running his lips. "And I'm glad you changed your mind."

Oh, how he wanted to gab about this change in events. But where was he supposed to start? He ran his hand through his hair, hoping to weed out the onset of shock from his brain.

Korra's eyes snapped wide and she gave him a puzzled look. "Wait…you're…glad?" She furrowed her brow. "Why are you-"

"Because the first decision was bad!" He reeled himself back. He didn't mean to cut her off, but gosh darn it, he had held his tongue out of cowardice for too long and it was about time to let it all out. He ran a hand through his tousled hair again and sighed. "Look- when you made the decision to get rid of it, it sounded like you were just trying to make everyone else happy." He gaged her reaction before continuing, "And it was like you were lying to yourself to make yourself think it was the choice that would make you happy too.

"But you weren't thinking about yourself and what you wanted-" Well, Mako supposed what Korra had wanted was to make others happy, but none of this had ultimately been in her best interest. "-what you really wanted." He looked down, feeling the heat of the attic sticking to his skin. "And I don't know, maybe I'm wrong. But I didn't say anything because I just thought you wouldn't listen…"

Hearing himself say it aloud made him feel childish. He was a team captain and wasn't afraid to confront his team on their faults. But he knew that deep down, he was also afraid to talk to her about it. Afraid that talking about it would put them in that much deeper.

He still wasn't ready for any of this.

"You're right on both counts," Korra admitted weakly. "I wouldn't have listened…" Guilt and disappointment rested on her stomach like a rock. "And I didn't realize it at the time, but I wasn't thinking about myself."

Growing up, she had been told she would be the protector of the world. They made it sound like she couldn't afford to think about herself- the whole world counted on her too much. Her title carried so much baggage and the weight of the words she had grown up hearing were lodged in her ears. Granted, she thought about herself at times –she pouted when Tenzin wouldn't let her off the island, or when things didn't go her way- but this was different. This could affect other people, and not just her. But thinking about the world only made things harder. Getting rid of it only would have hindered her ability to protect the world, and keeping it may make is just as hard. But if she had to take one of the roads, then she figured she would rather take a road she was more comfortable with.

"Be that as it may, I still should have said something," the firebender reassured. "I completely get that it's your body and it's your final say, but Pema said that it still would have helped in some way if I would have at least thrown in my two cents."

Now he had said just about everything, but at the same time it felt as if he hadn't said enough. But he was at a loss for words at this point.

"…I don't know." He scratched his head and looked away from his friend.

Korra had a feeling there was going to be a lot of "Pema said…" in the next few months.

"But I'm really sorry I didn't say anything." Mako's eyes held heavy guilt; the heaviest sandbags in the gym couldn't compare to the melancholy in his amber eyes. It made Korra's heart drop. This wasn't his entire fault. He made his mistakes and she made her own, but at the end of the day, they were still in this together.

"You still had our best interests at heart." Korra shrugged and smiled; it felt strange referring to the being inside of her as if it were already among them. Yet, she couldn't help but feel a nearly invisibly tug at her lips at the thought. "You told me to sit out of the match, and I didn't because I was stupid. But you didn't want either of us hurt, so maybe I should have just listened more." She didn't really know how to apologize for being completely challenged in accepting opinions of her character. She was the Avatar, and was used to thinking about the entire world before herself. "And I guess sometimes I forget that in order to take care of the world, I need to take care of myself," she said. It sounded like something Tenzin had said once, and she was pleased to know that some of his words of wisdom had stuck in her mind.

She watched as Mako looked away in a sort of bashful way before she sought the finality of her speech. "You want to just agree that we're both pretty hopeless and just move on?" She placed one of her hands on her hip while keeping the other one across her torso.

"Deal," Mako's eyes brightened and a soft smile adorned his tired face. Korra returned his smile with a bigger one, while brushing a strand of hair out of her face.

When she did this small action, Mako's eyes were drawn to her complexion. She seemed flushed and a thin layer of sweat was forming on her brow. He was sure it was the heat of the attic. Air conditioning wasn't a luxury they had, and it was warm outside. It was bad enough she hadn't been eating well or sleeping well- the last thing he needed was for her to collapse from heat exhaustion. "You look like you don't feel very well…" it was stuffy in the attic and she was prancing around in a parka in the middle of summer.

"I'm fine, just a little warm," she answered back quietly. She was actually sweltering, but she didn't want to remove her only protection. If she took it off, then she would be vulnerable and he would be able to see it. It was small, but the baby bump was there. Even if it wasn't –perhaps she was just self-conscious- the knowledge that a baby was present inside of her would draw his eyes to where it resided.

"You're gonna make yourself sick," Mako stated and drew his brows together. She didn't have him fooled. He was only in his tank top and pants and he was close to breaking out into a sweat. He noticed Korra didn't do too well in hot temperatures, probably because she was so acclimated to the harsh conditions of the South Pole. Either way, he wasn't going to watch her sweat herself to death. "Come on, take it off." His tone was an easy one, but there was a sound of gentle commandment behind it.

The Spirits knew how much she didn't want to do it. She'd rather bake in her parka than feel his eyes on her- or rather, where the baby was developing. Most people wouldn't notice the bump- and maybe she only noticed it because she knew, but she knew Mako would be able to see it. Not only was he directly involved, but he was also very observant. Taking off her only protection would remind him of just how real things were; it would remind her, too. But even she had to go to bed every night without the parka and seeing what was to come.

The doctor had badgered her, saying that she was hardly showing at all.

Sighing, Korra wrapped her fingers underneath the hem of her parka. The motion of taking it off was quick, but it felt so much longer and more dragged out to her. She was aware of every movement her clothing made against her skin and how her muscles stretched as she squirmed to get her arms and head out of the parka. She could feel her sides stretch, but she couldn't feel her belly stretch as much; she assumed this was just one of the many physical changes she was going to endure within the next few months.

Maybe she was being paranoid, but she was sure Mako was taking a moment to look her over while her parka was over her eyes. She wanted to say she could feel him staring, but tried to brush it off as being edgy about her appearance. Once she got the dark blue material off, she noticed how Mako's eyes were locked on her face. They were intense, as if he never looked away from her, but she knew his eyes had drifted just a little further south of her neck. And she couldn't blame him.

It was becoming second nature to hide it; she didn't even have to think about how awkward she felt before she draped her parka over her arms and held it close to her stomach. She looked away, ill-ease burning her neck and face.

He could tell she was self-conscious, but decided against saying anything about it. "Feel better?"

"I guess."

There was no 'I guess' about it. The minute she felt the attic's air hit her skin, she felt a ton better- at least temperature wise. Even if the attic was warm, it felt like paradise compared to the suffocating warmth of her parka.

Mako knew she was still uncomfortable- and he hated making her feel worse- but there was some information he wanted to know. "So," he started, "how far along did the doctor say you were?"

Korra looked down at her parka and then back at Mako. "About three months." The fact that he had asked meant he had definitely taken a moment to look, and it made her wonder just how much she was showing already. Surely she was just thinking too much. "The doctor had said two, but I did the math and I was a little further along than that."

"So you haven't told Pema or Tenzin that you're keeping it?"

"No," she answered. "I figured I'd tell you first."

"Then I guess we'll be going to talk to them once the sun comes up." He smiled at her and Korra could feel her heart nearly breaking.

She was so glad he was willing, yet she didn't want him to do more than she thought was necessary. He didn't have to be there every time she made a big revelation or any time she hit a mile stone.

"I can tell him by myself." Korra shrugged. "It's no big deal." She had a feeling Tenzin wouldn't be angry. The way he had been acting since she had made her decision told her so. While she hadn't been observant about herself, she had been paying attention to everyone else around her. She still wasn't sure if he would want to keep her in Republic city, but she knew that he would respect her decision.

"Still, I don't want you to have to go through this alone," Mako said easily. He started for the closet in the hallway and stood on his tip toes. "We both got into this together," he said as he hefted a blanket out of one of the shelves.

Truthfully, she was relieved that he was going to talk to Tenzin with her; it made her feel less alone. Korra just prayed that she wouldn't be sent back to the South Pole; not only would Mako not be there, but it would feel almost like a death sentence. It would be like she failed and would be sent back to where she came from and never be allowed to practice her duties again. Maybe she was over-dramatizing it, but to her it was the ultimate punishment for failure.

Her attention was drawn when she saw Mako toss the blanket onto the sofa and then go back to his room. He came back out with a pillow and sat down on the aging furniture. "What are you doing?" She cocked a brow.

"Going to sleep on the sofa," he stated simply. "You're going to take my room."

"No way," she answered a little too quickly. "I'm not kicking you out of your bed."

"You're not kicking me out of my bed," Mako reasoned. "I'm giving you my bed for the night."

"Whatever, I'm not sleeping in there." She folded her arms over her chest. The main reason was because she didn't want to take his bed from him. The other reason being that his room was where it all started. The last thing she felt like doing was lying down in his bed, being engulfed by his scent, and remembering the steamy night that got them into this mess. She was supposed to forget, not go relive it.

Mako pinched the bridge of his nose. This girl always made things more difficult than necessary. "Korra-"

"Are you doing this just because I'm pregnant?" There was no way she was going to let him get a word in edgewise. But if he was doing this just because of her 'condition', then she was going to have a field day with him. It was bad enough she got special treatment as the Avatar –something she didn't always mind- but she didn't need to be treated different just because she was with child too.

"No."

…Yes.

"It's a guest thing Korra- the host tries to make the guest comfortable."

"Well then maybe you should ask the guest what would make her most comfortable?" She gave him that snide, half-lidded, stare with a cocky grin. He thought it was adorable when it was aimed at someone else; meaning someone other than himself.

Mako let out a frustrated sigh and ran his hand over his face. "Fine." He could feel himself being backed into a corner. "What would make youmost comfortable?" He knew he wasn't going to like the answer.

"Sleeping on the sofa," she answered.

No, of course he wasn't going to like the answer.

Before the firebender could object, the Avatar plopped down a few feet away from his side and twisted herself around to where she was laying on her back, staring at him upside down. A victorious grin was plastered on her face as she folded her hands over her stomach and crossed her legs.

Well, she had him beat. Mako wasn't going to try and argue with her. At least she was in a good mood from this small triumph. He could have easily picked her up and dumped her on his bed and left her there, but he didn't want to rile her up. Moreover, he was tired and didn't feel like dealing with her stubborn attitude anymore. He didn't even bother getting up from the sofa. Instead, Mako scooted farther away from Korra and then mimicked her position, his head resting against hers once he settled into the worn sofa cushions. The probending captain was grateful that Korra didn't ask any questions about his submission or his settlement on the couch.

The two benders were both quiet for a while; both knowing that the other wasn't going to find sleep anytime soon. They both settled on staring at the high ceiling of the attic and listening to the noises of the city below. It was only when Korra felt Mako shift and run his hand through his hair that she decided words may be vital. Mako rested his hand next to his head, the palm facing the ceiling. Gently, Korra reached back and cautiously grabbed a few of his fingers with her hand. "Hey," she called out softly. She felt his head shift ever so slightly and that gave her permission to continue. "…Thanks…for you know, being here."

He thought about saying something smart, like "Well technically you're in my apartment." But he felt that the moment didn't call for it. Instead he would resign to swallowing the small lump in his throat, listening to how loud it sounded in the silence of the room, and moving his hand so that he could envelope hers in his grasp. He didn't know exactly what to say. He didn't want to say "You're welcome." Because really, he was part of the reason they were in this predicament. Saying she was welcome sounded so snarky and selfish- or at least to him it did. And he didn't want to say "It's not a problem" or "It's no trouble." Because really, it was. But he was part of the trouble and so was she. It wasn't just a sense of obligation to fix this problem that drove him to stay by her side. More than anything, he would say it was because he wanted to be there for her. Korra was his friend, his teammate, his Avatar, his crush, his Korra; a big part of his life that he didn't want to see in pain. She already had to bear the weight of the world; there was no way he was going to let her take on a baby by herself.

As he was trying to figure out what he was going to say in response, Korra kept talking. "I know that this isn't going to be easy," she voiced, "and I just want you to know that you really don't have to do any of this…" She felt him flinch, so she kept talking to explain herself. "I mean, I'm really glad that you're sticking with me on this, but…" Her eyes were downcast; suddenly the darkness of the attic was more intimidating than taming a wild polar bear dog. "I just don't want you to have to put anything in your life on hold." Asami, probending, and a slew of other things; these were the fragile things she didn't want to touch in Mako's world.

"You have to put everything on hold," he said into the darkness. He squeezed her hand. She would probably have to put her training on hold. Amon wouldn't be addressed- at least by the Avatar. She would have to quit probending and she would have to deal with the world's judgment. It just didn't seem fair that she would have to give up everything while he went on about his life, gallivanting as if nothing had changed. "If you have to put everything on hold, then so will I."

"It's not like I don't want you by my side," Korra reassured. "I just don't want you to have to break up with Asami, or quit probending or anything; you know, things you're entitled to, I guess."

"I'm not entitled to anything," he answered dryly. He hadn't ever been entitled to anything- at least not that he could recall. He wasn't entitled to kindness when he was on the streets, and he hadn't been entitled to a roof over his head or food. "But this kid should be entitled to a father." He would make sure of it. No child should have to grow up without one of their parents; forbid they grow up without both.

His life had never been about what anyone deserved or what they had their right to. It was about hard work and responsibilities. The way he saw it, this was no different. "I'll do whatever I can to take care of it."

The question for Korra though, was if Mako actually wanted to do any of this. Sure, he wanted to do what was right; she admired him for this. But it would be painful to watch someone act on priorities that they truly despised with all their being. She didn't want to strain their friendship any more than it had been already. She didn't want Mako to get frustrated or leave bitter. She would be lying if she said she didn't want his support and for him to be there for the child as it grew up, but she was afraid of Mako over exerting himself and then burning out halfway through.

She figured most of the stress would come from finances- assuming Asami wouldn't break up with Mako once she found out, or that he wouldn't have to quit probending, that is. Korra found it rather foolish. Mako would break his back trying to provide for a child who would already have all of the physical comforts in the world upon its arrival. Korra had always been taken care of her entire life, and she assumed that any direct family –such as a baby- would be supported as well.

But Korra knew Mako. She knew he was a driven person who put others before himself; an admirable trait which could easily become a nightmare for the holder. She didn't even need to ask what his plans were- she knew he would insist of doing everything he could in terms of finances. The waterbender didn't understand why, but she figured she could at least offer him an out in this particular compartment.

"I know, and I really appreciate it." Korra smiled, but it quickly faded. "I just don't want things to get any more stressful than they already are."

"I doubt me not taking care of our kid is going to make things less stressful." He had to let a small grin cross his face.

"You know what I mean," Korra grumbled.

"I think I do- but feel free to explain."

The question was, where was she to start?

"You already work too much as it is." Maybe that was the best place to start. And if it wasn't, it was too late to turn back now. "I just don't want you to work yourself into the ground and have to throw away anything that's important to you just because we screwed up." Korra sighed and closed her eyes. She was sure she already knew what he was going to say.

"I'm not gonna work myself into the ground." Bingo. "And I don't know what all I'm going to have to do." Korra knew that was a lie. The truth was Mako already had everything planned out without even talking to her first. But for the sake of arguing and making her angry, he would play ignorant. "But I'll work hard and make sure everything's taken care of."

Korra bit back a sigh. She was too tired to call him out of his bluff; he would work too hard and he already had plans set in stone. She supposed she would just have to earthbend his plans into oblivion and reconstruct it with him later.

"We'll talk to Tenzin in the morning and figure out what to do then," Mako said.

"Okay, but…" She felt like she needed to put in one final bit of reassurance into her side of the argument. "You really don't have to pay for the baby," Korra reminded. "I'll always be taken care of- you know, being the Avatar and all. That means the baby will be too."

It was a little bit of a sudden reminder. But Mako knew that Korra knew enough about him- money was always close to the forefront of his mind. He wasn't a greedy soul; no, he honestly could have cared less about the value of money in some regards. But he cared enough about it for survival purposes.

"I know, it's just…" His breath hitched in his throat and he swallowed. He knew all too well that everything would be taken care of financially. But he felt like he should be the one taking care of his baby- expenses and all. It was his, unexpected or not. It wasn't just obligation- it was also a mixture of pride and of care. Pride, because what kind of man –or person, really- couldn't provide for his own family? He had taken care of his brother for so long and he'd be damned if he couldn't take care of another one of his flesh and blood. Care, because he wanted to make sure that the baby would have everything it needed; medicine, clothes, food, what have you. He couldn't bare the idea of not providing for something so small and innocent –something that was his- because it deserved to be taken care of- not just by White Lotus sentries or babysitters, but by its father.

Spirits, he was going to be a father.

"I just want to, okay?" he said.

Korra wanted to keep assuring him that it wasn't mandatory, but she could hear the pleading in his voice. While she felt guilty that he was going to have to work that much harder, she figured she might as well let him be at peace with his decision…especially if he was willing to let her be at peace with hers and still be by her side.

"Okay," she answered gently.

Mako listened to the sounds of the attic. The small creeks from the floorboards and the moans from the machines were sounds which he usually fell to sleep to. He was glad to know that these same sounds were able to lull Korra to sleep. He listened to her soft snores and slowly closed his eyes to take everything in.

He still wasn't ready for any of this.

But by golly he was sure going to try.


	7. Too Early for This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Change of heart?"

Tenzin enjoyed his mornings. He had a set routine to most of them, and ravished in every second of the organization of his early schedule. But his morning went south when he found that Korra wasn’t in her room.

At first, the older man had assumed the waterbender had gone to the bathroom. When he hadn’t heard her blowing chunks in there, he went to the meditation pavilion- perhaps the Avatar had gotten a head start on her training this morning. But she wasn’t there. He scanned all of her favorite places on the island. He came to the terrible conclusion that she must have run off in the middle of the night.

It would be Tenzin’s luck, however, that he wouldn’t be granted the time to worry about where his pupil went. Instead he was told councilman Tarrlok was at the front of the temple and requested to see Tenzin.

Monkey feathers. That man couldn’t have come at a worse time. Before Tenzin could even walk out the front door, Tarrlok waltzed in- snide smile and half-lidded eyes as usual. “Tenzin- what a fine morning this is!”

“Well, it was…” Tenzin mumbled. “What do you want, Tarrlok?” This man was a nuisance, but he was easy to deal with on a normal day; today not being a normal day was what made it all the more difficult.

“I thought I could have a word with you and Avatar Korra.” Tarrlok looked over his shoulder to gage his fellow councilman’s reaction. “Perhaps over breakfast?”

He wasn’t just a scumbag, he was a mooch. Tenzin could deal with that on a normal day. But Tarrlok wanted to see Korra, too--and Korra was nowhere to be found. What’s more is that her appointment was in two hours. If Tarrlok caught wind of either of these troubles, then he could easily make a field day of it with the press. Tenzin could see the headlines now: “Promiscuous Avatar sneaks out for a night on the town and gets an abortion! Read more on page 9…”

“I’m afraid we’re a bit busy this morning.” Tenzin kept his calm, but he knew calm didn’t always work on Tarrlok.

Pema quietly walked into the hallway to see her husband conversing with the fellow councilman, and immediately she felt dread drape over her shoulders. She didn’t like this man any more than her husband did-she knew what he was capable of and what he was here for. Bribery and threats- mostly directed at Korra and Tenzin. He was the last person they needed to see today.

“Councilman Tarrlok!” Pema put on her best pseudo smile and approached the two men. “How…nice to see you!” Just because she put on an act didn’t mean she didn’t want him to take a hint. “What brings you here so early in the morning?”

“I just came to speak with your husband and Avatar Korra, but it seems that you are all busy this morning.”

“Yes, I’m afraid so.” Pema tried to sound casual, but she was really just itching to push him back out, slam the door in his face and lock it.

“Well then allow me to assist you with your busy schedule,” Tarrlok brushed past Tenzin and started down the hall. “I’m sure you could use all of the help you could get!”

“I don’t-”

“Don’t be so modest.” Tarrlok’s venomous gaze pierced Tenzin. “It would be my pleasure.” The low note at the end of his statement- it said that the conversation was done. Of course, the sly man only high tailed it to the kitchen and dining area. Help was the last thing he wanted to do for Tenzin and his family.

Once they were sure he was out of earshot, Pema whipped around to bark at her husband. “Tenzin, Korra has her appointment in two hours!” Pema emphasized. “We can’t have Tarrlok around when that happens!”

“I know,” Tenzin sighed. “I’m sure if he found out he would let the press have a field day over it.”

“Then you’d better figure out a way to get him out of here--and quick.” Pema crossed her arms. “Besides, I’m sure he’s the last person Korra wants to see this morning.” Pema knew that today could very well break the Avatar. Perhaps she would act like nothing had happened at first. Once the baby was gone, she would continue with training as usual. But Pema, as well as everyone else, knew that it wasn’t going to work out that way- at least not for Korra.

“Yes, well,” Tenzin huffed out an agitated breath, “it appears our Avatar snuck out last night.”

“What?!” Pema rasped. “You mean she’s not here?”

“No.” Tenzin glared at the floor. “I’m going to send the air acolytes to look for her if she doesn’t come back soon.”

“Have you checked the entire island?” Pema tried to reel back her agitation and her worry. She prayed Korra was alright and that Tarrlok would leave before they found her. Or, at the very least, that he wouldn’t stir up any more trouble.

“I’m going to have them check the island as well.” His eyes were downcast. “Perhaps she just needed time alone to…meditate on today’s expected events."

Because Spirits knew he needed to.

\--

She was tense and her stomach was in knots, but Korra was sure of this. She would keep this child and raise it. She wasn’t afraid of what her airbending teacher might think or say about it. He would be fine with her choice- this she knew would be true. Being sent home was her only fear from Tenzin, but even that wasn’t on the forefront of her mind right now. She wasn’t afraid, yet she was tense. It was a matter of anticipation and getting everything out into the open.

Korra glanced over at Mako--who was just as uptight as she was--but kept a steady pace alongside Naga’s lazier one. The poor polar bear dog never did like the island’s steps, to which all three teens could sympathize. Bolin was much more relaxed than she was; the way the earthbender saw it, there was nothing else to worry about and everything would work out just fine. Then again, he was pretty stoked to be an uncle- that was enough to make any dark day brighter for him.

Naga’s gate was slow and sloppy, gently rocking Korra from side to side. Back before she was pregnant she found the movement relaxing, but now it was only making her stomach churn. She swallowed the sick feeling in the back of her throat and tried to focus on the temple ahead, but found it to be no use.

“Hold on.” She reined Naga to a halt and both brothers stopped.

“What is it?” Mako asked.

Korra started climbing off of Naga, praying that the ground beneath her feet would relieve her nausea. “Just feeling sick is all.” She took a deep breath and swallowed, already feeling better.

“Are you gonna be alright?” Bolin peered around Naga at Korra.

“I’m fine.”

“Korra!”

Without thinking, Korra quickly looked up towards the direction of her name being called. The nausea she was so close to quelling came back with a vengeance and threatened to break down her barriers. She looked back down, placing her hands on Naga’s side and closing her eyes, focusing on anything that wouldn’t further upset her stomach. But having Tenzin coming their way so suddenly wasn’t really a relaxing thing. Seeing Tarrlok pop his head out from behind the front door didn’t help either.

Tenzin closed in on the group of teens, worry clear on his face. “Are you alright?” He took in Korra’s posture and his frown deepened.

“I will be,” she gnashed out. “Just give me a second.” Deep breath in, deep breath out- wipe the mind of any troubling thoughts and revel in the feeling of the cool breeze.

“Good morning, Avatar Korra.”

Well, clearly someone didn’t want her to hold down her breakfast.

Begrudgingly she looked up to find Tarrlok sauntering towards her with an ever present smug wiped across his face. She could only muster a small scowl before the nausea tugged for her attention again like a lonely puppy.

“It’s good to see you, as always.” The water tribe councilman stopped next to Tenzin, offering Korra a slightly less horrid smile.

“Yeah, I can’t say the same.” Deep breath in, deep breath out the nose.

Tenzin’s eyes examined Korra’s stature and the beads of sweat forming on her paling face. “Tarrlok,” Tenzin began firmly, “I’m afraid our conversation will have to wait until a later time. Korra is still not feeling well.”

“My goodness,” Tarrlok feigned concern. “It seems that you have had this bug for quite a while.”

He, too, took a moment to review her. She was slouched and leaning against her polar bear dog like she would fall over if it wasn’t there. She looked a bit pale and her brow furrowed and twitched; the lump in her throat slightly visible as it moved up and down when she swallowed.

“Are you sure it’s nothing more serious?”

Korra tried to swallow her nausea back once more. “I’m getting better.” She shot him a short-lived glare before she fought yet another wave of discomfort. For the record, it wasn’t a complete lie. She had been feeling better in terms of her morning sickness.

“And you look quite tired,” Tarrlok claimed. “Surely you haven’t been out all night, have you?” His suave talk was laced with dubious deviousness; a sick grin accompanying his searching gaze.

Mako quietly clenched his jaw and focused on his breathing. He tried to keep his shoulders from bunching up and drawing his hands into fists. This guy had a lot of nerve; too much of it for their comfort. Tarrlok was the kind of man who wouldn’t stop until he got what he wanted, and it appeared he wanted to break down the Avatar’s barriers and use whatever Korra had against her.

And Korra had a lot that could be used against her.

“We were out all night tracking Equalists,” Mako stepped forward. “We heard about a small gathering.” Mako’s amber eyes flitted to Tenzin for some kind of approval; he only prayed that he was telling a believable lie. Tenzin’s serious face told him nothing, so Mako kept going. “There were about ten of them and they were planning a riot.”

“Uh-huh, yeah,” Bolin piped in. “They were going to start a not-so-peaceful protest outside of the arena during the next probending match. And we couldn’t have that!”

“Really?” Tarrlok asked, unconvinced. “And pray tell did you obtain such information?”

“You can hear a lot on the streets if you listen,” Mako said.

“Or your dirty street habits have followed you into your new lives as probenders.”

Mako remained quiet; no emotion on his face. He wouldn’t take that as an insult- because it would be a lie if he said that his claim wasn’t true. He had more street smarts than the next guy, and he utilized it when he needed to, even though it wasn’t part of his life anymore.

“What do you want, Tarrlok?” Korra growled. She just wanted to go inside and sleep, but she knew this man would make her dreams sour.

“I merely wanted to come to speak to you and Tenzin about city matters.” He shrugged, then smirked at Korra. “And to see how you were fairing.”

“Peachy,” Korra deadpanned. “Tell us what you’ve got to say and then leave.”

“I’ll try to make it quick.” He smiled; he didn’t really want to see the Avatar lose her breakfast in the bushes. The councilman turned to Tenzin and he put on a serious expression. “Scandals have been spreading around the city like a disease- word that well-known companies are secretly backing the Equalist movement in particular.”

“Yes, I have heard that…” Tenzin answered thoughtfully. “I also find it odd that we haven’t heard from Amon himself in the past month.”

“Agreed,” Tarrlok nodded. “He appears to be hiding in wait. For what, that is unclear.”

“Maybe he wants to gather more followers,” Korra voiced while crossing her arms. She didn’t need any of this right now, but it was a relief to be talking about something else other than her impending motherhood.

“Yes, but to get followers and to start up riots and rallies he would want to be loud and clear.” Tenzin stroked his beard. “I was expecting him to abuse the radio waves again.”

“Sometimes doing things in secret is more effective,” Mako punched in. “If he keeps it quiet then the authorities can’t bust his supporters, and he can keep his followers.”

“Yeah, the Red Monsoons were really bad about that.” Bolin stroked his chin. “They wanted people to know they were bad, but they always kept their plans a secret.”

“This is all plausible,” Tarrlok grunted, “but we’re limited on intelligence. All we know is that Cabbage Corp is on the list of suspects, as well as a few other smaller companies.”

“Wouldn’t an investigation be the smart thing to do?” Korra took a deep breath; her nausea was finally subsiding.

“If we can get a warrant,” Tenzin answered.

“We’ll discuss it more at the council meeting tomorrow. I just wanted to make sure you and the Avatar knew what was going on and to keep your guards up. There’s no telling what Amon is planning, but from what Avatar Korra has told us it is nothing good and will likely involve your family and the Avatar as well.”

Tarrlok turned to face Korra. “And it looks like you are…recovering.”

“Slowly, yes,” Korra bit.

“Tell me, how long have you been sick?”

“I guess about a month,” she shrugged with a pout. Like Tarrlok even cared.

“And you just get sick on and off throughout the day?” He wished he knew what was ailing the Avatar; then maybe he could expect a time frame for her full recovery. But another suspicion was lurking in the back of his mind.

“Basically.” Korra raised a brow at her fellow water tribe man. “Now could you please leave?”

Tarrlok kept his eyes locked on Korra; cold, calculating, but uneasily still. The only time they moved was when he glanced at Mako and Bolin.

“…Interesting. Well,” he cleared his throat, “I hope you make a full recovery and we hope to see you back on the force soon.”

“Doubtful, but thank you for your concern.” Korra pretended to be interested in her fingernails, her bottom lip jutting out. She had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach, but chose to ignore it for the time being. She had other things to handle, plus she didn’t feel like upsetting her stomach again.

“We’ll just see.” Tarrlok retained his smirk, but his displeasure was clear by the twitch of his lips and the angle of his eyebrows. “You all have a wonderful day.” He nodded at both Tenzin and Korra before taking the long journey back down the island steps.

Korra scoffed. Tarrlok had the worst timing possible. She had hoped to come back to an island filled with good company, not to a shark snake.

“Where have you been?!” Tenzin raised his voice. “We’ve been looking all over for you, and you’re appointment is-”

Korra held up a hand and closed her eyes; here it goes. “Actually, Master Tenzin…” She winced as she said his name. She just hoped her assumptions about how he would react were right. “We needed to talk to you about that…”

\--

Mako sat rigid, his hands in his lap. His ochre eyes shifted between Pema and Tenzin, who sat across the table from him and Korra. They both seemed serious; maybe even a little miffed, considering Korra had pulled a vanishing act last night. But above all else they bared concern openly to them both. When his eyes landed on Korra she looked a tad nervous- perhaps even rueful. She had told him that she felt bad for putting everyone through this rollercoaster of choices, but he told her not to worry about it. So long as she was happy, then it really didn’t matter.

The Avatar twisted her hands about nervously in her lap. There wasn’t anything to be nervous about. Tenzin would understand and respect her decision. But this was it: her final decision. She didn’t want to keep jumping across the lines and going back on her choices. The side of the line was where she planned on staying.

Still, this was the cement decision. She was going to have a future with a small child in it; someone she would have to take so much time out of her day to take care of and love. She just hoped she was capable.

Her hands continued twisted about and pinching her pants. “I’m not aborting the baby…” Korra quickly looked down, lifting her brows to herself in a congratulatory manner. She shook her head to get herself to keep talking, “After the probending scare I started thinking… I guess I realized that I cared more about it than I thought.” She looked up ever so briefly, before looking back down at her lap. “So I’m keeping it.”

Neither adult said anything initially. They both appeared to be dumbstruck, so Korra bowed her head and kept talking. “I’m really sorry for putting everyone through so much trouble,” she looked up, icy eyes locking with the older grey ones of her mentor, “but this is something I have to do.”

“Korra, you don’t need to be sorry,” Pema spoke first. Tenderness leaked from her voice like honey and immediately put Korra at ease. “We know this has been hard. This is a big decision, after all!”

“She’s right,” Tenzin began softly. He wouldn’t let anger intercede this time. Allowing anger to corrupt his relationship with his student would only lead to disaster beyond his comprehension. But more than that, he knew Korra needed him now more than ever, and he wouldn’t brush her aside.

“It’s alright to change your mind…” The old airbender glanced at his wife to the side and exchanged a timid look. “Actually, we’re glad you did.”

Korra’s eyes widened and she craned her head back a little. “Wait.” She looked over at Mako briefly before placing her eyes back on the couple before her. “But I thought that you thought it was a good idea?”

“It was a smart idea,” Tenzin paused to stroke his beard, “given all that you two have to deal with, a…termination would have been a logical option. But, well, for you…” Tenzin sighed, placing both of his hands on the table. His wisdom was like books in a library; sometimes sorting through it and finding the right book was what made it difficult. “Sometimes the smartest idea isn’t the best idea.”

The airbending master paused for a moment, gathering and sorting his thoughts.

“Korra…” Tenzin pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. What all did he need to say to her? Where in the world did he start and how did he go about saying it all in just the right way; in the way she needed to hear it? He supposed he needed to start from the beginning.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you the other day. The news just…surprised me. I didn’t mean what I said.”

“It’s alright.” Korra knew he was genuinely sorry. She could forgive him. But the sad fact of the matter was that the seed of doubt had been planted. Before he had said anything, she had merely held the seed in her hands, staring at it- afraid that it could grow. The minute he compared her to his father and judged her possible mothering capabilities, he had planted it. It was up to her now if she decided to water it and let it grow.

“No, it’s not alright.” Tenzin shook his head. “But it’s in the past now, and I can’t take back what I said. Right now, I’m just glad you’ve come to the decision that’s right for you.”

“And we’re glad that you came to talk to us,” Pema interjected earnestly. “Both of you.”

Korra smiled lightly; she was glad she had made the right decision. And she was glad that Mako was there to make it with her.

“I imagine now would be the best time to figure out our next course of action,” Tenzin said.

“Since you’re going to go through with the pregnancy, we need to set up a doctor’s appointment and get you on some prenatal medications.” Pema smiled; it tickled her pink to know she would be the voice of experience for the younger woman.

“Uh, yeah.” Korra was sure of her decision, but she could already feel the overwhelming tidal wave rising behind her.

“I have to know,” Tenzin interrupted gently. He hoped his next question wouldn’t set off an entire war. “Have you considered adoption?” Tenzin asked gently.

“Yeah, it’s just…” Korra looked down at the table when she found out she didn’t have a direct answer. “I couldn’t bear the thought of aborting it- and I know that’s totally different from giving it up for someone else to raise, but…” She scanned the palms of her hands; maybe the answers were in the lines. But she found none.

“It’s quite alright.” Tenzin raised a palm to cease her and put her at ease. “You don’t need to explain.” The airbender took his focus off of his student and placed it on the firebender seated next to her. The boy seemed formal in the way he sat; his posture straight and his eyes focused and alert, even though it was clear he hadn’t had much sleep. “And I assume you’re taking responsibility for this as well?”

“Yes, sir.” Mako bowed his head.

“I’m glad to hear it.” The bearded man sighed. Finally, all of the chess pieces were in place and the game could begin. “I suppose we need to figure out what we’re going to do from this point onward.” He brought his hand to his face, the sides of his fingers pressed around his cheeks as he contemplated their plan of action.

Korra wished she could contribute to a plan, but she hadn’t the slightest idea of what to do. She had been so focused on getting everything out of her system that she hadn’t given thought to what came after this. Her only fear had been that Tenzin would send her back to the South Pole- and now the fear suddenly felt amplified now that all the cards were on the table.

“Leaving the island is out of the question.”

Korra perked up. “Wait- aren’t you going to send me back home?”

“What?” Tenzin was shocked by the question. “Why would we send you back home?”

“Because I came here to train but I got knocked up instead!” Korra held up her hands, glancing from one to the other as she spoke of each topic.

Tenzin had to swallow the ruffled feeling her bluntness shoved into him. He cleared his throat. “Yes well, you came here to complete your airbending training. As far as I’m concerned, there’s no sense in sending you home when you haven’t mastered it.”

Korra visibly relaxed. She could stay and not have to face complete and utter failure by returning home. She could stay here and not have to go home with her head hung low and her tail between her legs as an unwed teenage mother. Mako could still be close by and he could still be there for his child.

How much that last part meant to her still blew her away.

“Wait.” Korra could feel dread settling on her stomach. “When you say no leaving the island…”

“I mean,” Tenzin knew he would have to put a lot of emphasis on this next part, “you won’t permitted to leave the island until after your child is born.”

“What? You can’t be serious!”

“I’m very serious.”

“But that isn’t fair!” She regretted it the minute she said it. She knew she would get the ‘you did the crime, now you do the time’ kind of talk from him. “Just because I’m pregnant doesn’t mean I’m some kind of convict!”

“It’s not about being in trouble,” Tenzin countered quickly. “It’s too dangerous for you to be wandering about the city as it is in your condition.”

“He’s right,” Mako joined in. He got a dirty look from Korra, but he didn’t falter. “With Amon and the Equalists running around- you wouldn’t stand a change while being pregnant.”

Korra scowled, biting her bottom lip. She had already thought of all this; cursed it as well. She knew that she would have to stay clear of Amon and the press would be a problem, but she never considered completely isolating herself on the island. The idea made her stomach roll and her heart burn; she was a creature that longed to be free, not tied down to one spot. But she knew her teacher and the father of her child were right. Amon could use her condition, or –spirits forbid- her child against her. Tarrlok could easily exploit her and the reporters would have ball spreading the word of an Avatar baby.

“You’re right…” she ground out.

Seeing that the announcement of her lockdown was frustrating, Tenzin continued, “You’ll continue to train your physical self- staying away from the gates. When you progress further into your pregnancy, then you will be restricted to meditation and reading.”

Her least two favorite training activities; wonderful. But it was still better than going back home and having to sew baby booties out of yak bear fur, all while receiving judgment from around the village.

“Alright,” she sighed. Not being able to leave the island was going to be the hardest thing for her, but she could handle meditating and reading no sweat, even if it was a complete drag.

She was taking this all surprisingly well. Tenzin was glad for it, too. If the Korra he had met a year ago were in this position he would have seriously contemplated sending her back to the South Pole- mostly for his own sanity. But she had matured in a young woman; a bit of a rough young woman and who was still tender-footed in the ways of adulthood, but a majestic being of respect.

Tenzin only hoped Mako could keep up with the finesse Korra was slowly beginning to exude. He was just about to start laying into Mako about his plans, but Mako beat him to the punch.

“I’m going to quit probending and work full-time at the power plant.”

Tenzin and Pema were taken aback, while Korra sighed quietly. She knew Mako wasn’t done yet. “I’ll pay for everything the baby needs- clothes, food, medicine-”

“I already told you, you don’t need to do that.” Korra rested her elbow on the table and lay her forehead in her hand. The fatigue was catching up to her even more now that she had some of the weight off of her shoulders. It didn’t help that the room was pleasantly warm.

“And I told you that I am,” Mako stated firmly. “I’m taking responsibility for it.”

The airbenders didn’t know Mako or his brother very well. They knew they were friendly boys who loved to probend, and they were aware that they had no parents and had lived on the streets, but everything else about them was a mystery. Tenzin couldn’t help but feel a little skeptical about Mako’s conviction, but he also commended it, and couldn’t help but feel sorry for the boy. It was clear the firebender worked hard and that recent events had taken away precious hours of sleep.

But Tenzin could also tell from a few of the matches he had attended, that probending was something Mako enjoyed. His moves in the ring were lively and light, yet powerful and controlled. If all the boy planned to do was work a lousy, dead end job –and Tenzin knew how the power plant worked- then he would be miserable like half of the adult population of the city. He was far too young to be stuck in a job like that and have no outlet to keep him happy. Not to mention, Mako was so good at probending that he had a shot at the championship. Even if he didn’t make it that far, he could still win matches and bring in money.

Even in all of this, Korra was right. There was no need for Mako to provide any money. But Tenzin was a man of virtue, and he supposed Mako must be too. He knew that this was not only a matter of taking responsibility, but a matter of pride. And judging by the way Mako’s fiery eyes bored into Tenzin’s hazy grey ones, it was also possibly a matter of care.

“I don’t know that quitting probending is the right answer,” Tenzin answered thoughtfully.

“Yeah,” Korra added. “You shouldn’t have to give up something you love.”

“But I am,” Mako stated with certainty.

Korra was touched by his conviction. His honey-colored eyes were hard and focused; he was completely behind her on all of this. But she couldn’t just sit by and watch him give up everything. “Mako,” Korra started, “I think you should listen to Tenzin. I don’t want to see you quit probending over this.”

“It would be a shame not to see the Fire Ferrets participate this season.” Tenzin smiled softly.

There was trepidation in Mako as he flinched. It was tempting to take the offer. He didn’t want to quit something that could possibly get him and his brother out of complete poverty- not to mention help him take care of his child with even more ease.

“But what about you?” Mako looked at Korra with sincerity. “You love probending too.”

“Yeah, but I physically can’t play.” She gave him a genuine smile; something she hadn’t given anyone in a long time. “It’s fine, really.”

And it was. For the first time in a while she was actually fine. She was finally coming to accept these turn of events.

She had been insistent; Mako should have known better than to argue with her. Even if she had to get someone to back her up, she always seemed to win against him. Mako took this was grace; her smile the main motivation. He bowed his head to the airbending master and his wife. “Thank you.”

\--

Tenzin called the Dr. Tai about Korra’s abortion. He firmly told the physician that the appointment would not be necessary. He could hear the soft smile on the doctor’s lips on the other side of the phone. “Change of heart?”

Tenzin was about to answer when he heard a high-pitched squeal outside. He turned his grey eyes to the window and saw Mako, Bolin, Korra, and his children all outside. Ikki was jumping up and down excitedly, and Meelo and Jinora’s faces were bright with enthusiasm. They each started jumping and jostling about in all of their newfound delight, and then each took a moment to hug Korra before bombarding her with, what Tenzin imagined, were questions and words of excitement. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Mako and Korra had delivered the news of their expecting baby to Tenzin’s children.

It was when Tenzin turned his attention to the young man and woman next to his children that it dawned upon the aging man. Korra’s smile was beginning to reach her eyes again as she grabbed Ikki by her arms to steady her. A whimsical laugh bent the air to its liking as it left her lips and floated across to his window. It was such a beautiful noise to hear after such a long time of conflicting silence. Then the airbender looked to Mako. The firebender’s smile was light, weighed down by fatigue. But it didn’t matter how small the smile was, because it reached his eyes, just like Korra’s did. His posture was a bit slouched and his hands were stuffed in his pockets, but an aura of happiness could be felt all the way from where Tenzin was sitting.

Tenzin’s mind went through his file cabinet of memories. Korra had already been through so much, even before getting pregnant. And as he had watched her overcome different obstacles he had gotten a better grip on what kind of person she was. She was someone who never backed down. Her decision to terminate her pregnancy had been one made out of fear; granted, all of the reasons she presented were sound and sensible. However, the decision was so unlike Korra. Her mind had gotten tangled up in all of the anxiety and fear, and even justice for her title and the city, but she had yet to think of the growing life inside of her. But once she had, everything clicked into place. Once she had finally quit thinking about everyone else, and thought for herself for once, she was able to reach a happy medium. Her heart had been in the right place all along, but she couldn’t quite see it through the thick haze of anxiety.

“No,” Tenzin stated simply. “I just don’t think her heart was ever in it to begin with.”


	8. Feeling Brave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I guess I just wanted to say…" She paused. She really hoped this wouldn't come out sounding weird. "Even though we hadn't planned on it…and even though we were drunk…" She scraped up enough bravery to look him in the eyes. "I'm glad my first time was with you."

Chapter 8: Feeling Brave

A week later, the Avatar found herself perched on her bed with yet another predicament in front of her.

The waterbender sighed and swallowed the dry lump in her throat. Licking her lips, she looked down at the notebook in her lap, then out the window, and then back to the parchment-bound book. She twirled the pen in her dark fingers, but it never made contact with the paper.

Korra beat the end of the pen against her leg and took a deep breath. She supposed she could be blunt in telling her parents; it had worked for her with everyone else. (Well, maybe not.) But she felt that being blunt in the form of a letter would be inappropriate. Not only would it give off the wrong vibe – she imagined one of fear and indifference- but it would leave her parents with so many questions. She wouldn't be there to explain everything to them in person, so they would have to wait days to receive a response from her. She really didn't want her parents to sit on a mound of concern over this for so long. They would already be concerned enough as it was, even with the facts under their fur wraps.

The waterbender just wanted to be able to convey all of the recent events to her parents and translate her jumbled emotions into inked words. It shouldn't be so hard; yet she found herself at a loss. There was so much to say and so much to explain; questions to answer before they were asked, and questions to anticipate. She didn't know where to start.

Again, Korra looked down at the paper with restlessness and read over what she had already spilled onto the paper:

Mom and Dad,

I hope everything is going well for you at home. Things have been worse for wear here lately, but I'm not going to go into detail about the distress the city has been in. Rest assured, everything is fine as far as that goes.

I hope you're sitting down to read the next part- I'm sure glad I was.

I'm kind of pregnant.

Okay, there's no "kind of" about it, I guess. Look, I know you're disappointed. I know you're angry, and probably confused, and you have every right to be. But before you freak out and write me a letter about how you're going to disown me, let me at least speak out.

A friend and I got drunk, and things just got out of hand. Originally we were just going to put it all behind us and stay friends, but I guess it came back and caught up with us in the form of a baby.

At first I was going to abort it. I mean, the Avatar, pregnant? Not only does it look bad, but I already have too many things to do. But I realized I couldn't do it. And I realized that I couldn't give it away. So Mako and I have decided to keep it.

We probably don't know what we're getting ourselves into, but we're willing to try.

I'm sorry that I've disappointed you, and I'm sorry that I've let everyone down. But I just wanted to let you guys know what's going on and that everything will hopefully…

Korra stopped for a brief moment. She stared down at that last word: hopefully. That didn't really sound like her, did it? She was usually so sure of everything. However, given recent events, she wasn't completely confident in anything anymore. Maybe it was because she was so used to being able to control whatever came her way. But she didn't have control over a baby; at least not in the same way she had control over her bending. This baby wasn't even out in the real world yet and it was already stumping her.

Ripping out the paper and crumpling it up, the waterbender sighed yet again. She threw the wadded up paper over to the pile of rejected letters, the ball of notebook paper bouncing off of the mountain and rolling a few inches away. Korra leaned back in her spot and longingly looked out the open window next to her bed. She knew if she stood up and walked straight to the window, then she would see the arena glowing in all of its glory.

Thoughts of the arena brought her mind to the fabulous bending brothers, and then to the father of her child.

Mako had told her last night that he and Bolin would be by later the next day—around dinner time, most likely. They did love Pema's cooking, after all. But he said that before they came over he had to work, and that he had business to take care of. He had said he would be opting out of practice that day, but that Bolin was still going to be training.

Poor sucker.

Either way, the Avatar had a sinking feeling in her gut; one that tickled the inside of her stomach mercilessly and made her hands tingle with anxiety.

Korra couldn't help but wonder if this business had something to do with telling Asami.

\--

The Sato mansion was always a glorious sight to behold. Its pristine walls scaled high, and the windows always sparkled under the sun's rays in such a proud way. Most gawked in awe when they passed the impressive structure, only dreaming of entering such a fine establishment.

Today, however, Mako felt that the Sato estate was anything but impressive. Instead it was daunting, threatening to swallow him whole as it loomed over him his guilt-ridden stature. The beautiful white walls never seemed so dreary; the windows never seemed to reflect light with such ferocity. It was like the house already knew and wanted to ward off the enemy from attacking its residents.

Mako gripped his tattered scarf in his hand as he gazed up at the home. Before, he had always felt welcomed and honored to be able to enter such a wonderful place. He always felt blessed to have come across a girl like Asami—not just because she was rich and beautiful, but for everything else she was, as well. Such a kind, hospitable, and passionate woman; he was undeserving of the fondness she so willingly poured upon him.

It had always struck him as odd-but he counted it as a blessing nonetheless-that someone like Asami—someone of such high standing and of such gentleness—would be so romantically interested in someone like him. He didn't amount to much in society; he had been a street urchin for years, and now he was just a starving probending rookie who was still rising through the ranks. How did that appeal to a woman like Asami? He just couldn't believe someone like her, or anyone for that matter, could find him so interesting.

Then again, he couldn't believe he had knocked up the Avatar, either.

Mako sighed, closing his eyes and focusing on the feeling of the fabric clutched in his fist. He wished his father were here to tell him what he should do. He hadn't the slightest idea of how to go about telling his girlfriend of his impending fatherhood with another woman. But Mako already knew that this is exactly what his parents would have wanted him to do.

He should have taken care of this sooner. He should have taken care of it the minute he found out Korra was pregnant. No—he should have taken care of it the same day he woke up in bed naked with Korra. This lying game was going on for way too long, and Mako knew that if he kept playing then it was going to severely hurt all of the players involved; or at least, more so than they already were going to be.

Besides, Asami didn't deserve any of this—what he did behind her back and what he was doing to her now. Lately he had been avoiding her in favor of Korra and his own solitude. He didn't mean anything cruel by it; it was just that Mako was very unsure of how to approach this crime.

He didn't even know how to act around Asami anymore. What used to be easy going conversation and calm smiles now felt like lies and betrayal. Being around her made him feel uncomfortable and insurmountably guilty. Whenever he was around her, he just wanted to blurt out the truth in the most blatant of ways. No, he knew this had to be done delicately. He had to make sure she knew that he meant her no harm, and that he was ashamed of hurting her.

Aside from his cowardice, he also had little time. Between work, probending practice, and preparing for a baby, he scarcely had the time to spare for his girlfriend.

Yet Asami didn't even know Mako was planning for a baby. But to be fair, Mako didn't even know he would be planning for a baby at the age of nineteen, either.

She deserved to know about what was coming into his very near future; how he had shattered her trust. And she deserved to decide what she wanted to do about it.

Mako swallowed and stood in place for a moment longer. He tried willing his feet to move, but instead they tingled with anticipation and stubbornly remained glued to the ground. He sighed and forced his lead feet forward.

As he was let in through the front gate and taken up the path to the estate's front door, the firebender tried to keep his mind calm by looking around. He busied his mind with the color of the grass and the way the trees swayed in the wind, with the flowers dancing about in flocks in the gardens. He quietly mused about how much work it would be if one person were to take care of the yards. Not like he really cared. Mako was just trying to grab at anything that might keep the nervousness at bay, even if only for a few seconds.

It was working, but the minute he stepped foot into his girlfriend's house, he let the boat of nervousness come into the docks. The butler eloquently stated that Miss Sato was probably out in one of the garages. It didn't surprise Mako. His girlfriend loved working on Satomobiles, and would sometimes build them from scratch and personalize them for her liking. The good thing about this was that the garage she was probably working in was empty. Asami liked to work on her cars alone without any workers or servants around. It would be an ideal place to break the news to her.

The butler led Mako down to the garages and stopped in front of the door that had Miss Sato behind it. As the butler twisted the door knob, Mako took a deep breath and waited to hear Asami's voice.

"Miss Sato," the butler started, "Master Mako is here to see you."

The surprised, yet chipper sound of his girlfriend's voice made the sweat bead on his forehead. "Oh, great! Send him in."

The butler quickly moved out of the way and allowed Mako through before quietly shutting the door to leave both teenagers alone.

"Hey sweetie," Asami crooned as she came up to Mako and hugged him. Mako went along with the actions, but he couldn't share her excitement. He accepted her kiss, but couldn't put his heart into it. "It's so great to see you! It feels like it's been forever."

"Yeah." Mako smiled lightly. "Sorry about that." Mako squeezed her one more time before separating himself from her—something he never would have done before. "Things have just been really…hectic, lately."

"It's fine, I completely understand." She grabbed her boyfriend by the wrist and eagerly dragged him across the garage. "Come on—I want you to see the new model my father has been working on." She took him to the car she had been fiddling with before he had arrived. She spoke enthusiastically, but he found himself faking most of his smiles and only nodding to make it look like his was listening. His nerves were frayed and his worries were blocking his ears from hearing anything else but his concerns.

He hated that he was going to have to squash her chipper attitude. Yet at the same time, he just wanted to get it over, with regardless of her reaction. All of the stress had been getting to him and Korra. Once he tackled this, then he could focus on other things that required his attention.

"Mako?"

Mako's head snapped up to look at his girlfriend. "Huh?"

She held a look of utter concern on her pretty features. "Is everything okay?" She leaned back against the Satomobile in the making. "It looked like you spaced out for a minute there."

"Oh, uh, sorry." Mako offered her a small smile. "I guess I've just had a lot on my mind lately." This was his first attempt to steer the conversation into the direction of reveal. Knowing his girlfriend, she would probably rendezvous with him and keep it rolling until he spilled the beans.

"Like what?" Asami was still smiling, but there was a hint of concern in her light green eyes.

"Uh, well…like work and probending, and Bolin and Korra." Mako glanced down at the floor. One step closer. "You know, the usual."

"How is Korra?" Asami asked with the upward tilt of her eyebrows. "I haven't gotten a chance to talk to her since the probending incident."

"Uh-"

"Is she still sick?"

"Uhm…" Mako huffed with a small, nervous laugh. This wasn't funny, but for some reason he couldn't help but find a small sliver of humor in her question and the answer. "Sort of."

"Sort of?" She raised an eyebrow to compliment her smirk. "So she's getting better?"

Mako shoved his hands in his coat pockets and wished that he had something in them to fiddle with to ease his anxiety. "Um…sort of?"

"Well is she getting better or not?" Asami could feel a small quarry of worry form at the bottom of her stomach.

"It's…hard to explain." It wasn't hard to explain at all, just hard to say. "She doesn't have the flu anymore." Mako rolled his shoulders for a moment, trying to let the nervousness tumble off of them. "I don't know that she even had the flu to begin with." He quietly made a mental note to ask Dr. Tai if Korra had been sick at all and if it could have affected the baby's health.

"So is she better or does she have something else?" Asami turned around in favor of leaning over the Satomobile rather than against it.

Just spit it out, Mako. Just say it.

"Asami." Mako barely recognized his own voice. He spoke firmly, however the low nervousness that echoed in his vocal chords made him question his resolve to tell her right then and there. But he had to tell her then; it was eating him up inside, and she deserved to know. "Korra's not sick." He looked at her for a fleeting moment; her green eyes were filled with concern and confusion, but they were patient and told him to go on. Mako took in a deep breath through his nose and sighed quietly. Just say it.

"She's pregnant."

Asami's eyes widened, and she could feel the air whoosh out of her, as if she had been punched in the stomach. What had Mako just said? Korra was pregnant? How did those two things even wind up in the same sentence without a "not" in between? How in the world could she be pregnant? They were only teenagers, for spirits' sake!

Asami's mind quickly flitted to memories of some of the other wealthy girls in the city. She had always been forced to associate with them because of her father's line of work. Some of those girls were very uptight and high maintenance—never dreaming of having affairs before they were married. Others, however, felt smothered by their families, and went out of their way to find a way out and defy their parents.

Those were the girls who wound up pregnant. The girls who weren't careful and felt they had something, yet nothing at all to prove. The girls who could have cared less about where their lives were going and looked for love in all the wrong places.

Korra wasn't one of those girls. Surely Korra had been misdiagnosed, or Mako had heard wrong. Korra wasn't one to throw things away like the rich girls; Asami knew that. Sure, Korra was a bit stifled by the White Lotus, but the Avatar also had a heightened sense of responsibility and duty to her people. She wouldn't just go out and sleep with some guy to make a point and forego all of her Avatar responsibilities.

Which led her to her next question in the tirade of her thoughts: If Korra was in fact pregnant, then who in the world was the father? Who was Korra seeing? She certainly wasn't the kind of girl who just went out on the town to find that sort of fun. Korra would only sleep with someone she knew and was close to. And the only two guys Korra was close to were Bolin and…

Asami whipped her head around and looked at her boyfriend. He stood firm in his spot across from her, but his shoulders were slumped and his eyes were downcast, avoiding hers at all cost. He looked defeated, maybe even tired and guilty. When he did look up at her—even for just a fleeting second before looking back down at the scuffed garage floor—his amber irises were filled with apologies not yet spoken; kept inside of lips that didn't want to speak or cause further pain.

The Sato heiress could feel her heart dropping faster than one of her father's newest plane prototypes-and Asami could safely say that she had never seen machines drop from the sky so fast.

She almost didn't even want to speak. Asami had the worst feeling that she knew what Mako was going to say. But she hoped—she prayed—that she was just paranoid and reading him all wrong.

But Asami wasn't stupid. She saw the way Mako and Korra acted around each other; how they smiled and how everything they did seemed natural. Even though Asami had considered letting Mako go, she still didn't want to do it. She certainly didn't expect something like this to happen. And she hoped with all of her heart that her suspicions were false. Because she still wasn't ready to let him go.

She could already feel the feeling of tears biting at her lower eyelids, but she tried to keep her trembling voice level. "Mako-"

Mako cut her off, "Asami, I'm sorry."

That was all she needed to hear; that alone was enough for confirmation.

"I didn't mean for this to happen." Of course not; and he kicked himself for the way he said it. That was how the sleazy men in all of the popular black and white movies said it—as if they were innocent and this was something out of their control. But everyone still thought the guy was a scumbag and deserved the slap across the face he usually got from the woman he betrayed. Honestly, Mako wouldn't blame Asami if she decided to run him over with a Satomobile. Because just like those men in the movies, he deserved it. But he had to keep talking; not just for Asami, but for himself, and even for Korra. "And Korra didn't either. It was a mistake." And yet, he found that he didn't regret it. He regretted hurting the wonderful woman in front of him—but that was it.

"I just don't…" Asami couldn't even form a coherent sentence. There was so much to say and different ways to say them. She wanted to erase everything from her mind and not feel anything; not have to say anything. How could Mako have let this happen? How could Korra have let this happen? How could she have-

She stopped that thought before it came to full bloom. She wasn't at fault here; Asami was an innocent in this. It didn't matter if she could have dumped Mako sooner or if she wasn't good enough. That wasn't the point. The point was Mako cheated and Korra went behind her back and now all she could feel was the growing pain that escorted the anguish in her heart.

Mako had never wanted to leave a room so badly; to crawl into a hole and never come out. He hated seeing the pained look slowly contorting his girlfriend's face, knowing that he was the one who marred such a pretty face with the news of his unfaithfulness. But he had to keep talking; he wasn't sure why, because part of him wanted to stop, but the other part of him wanted to make things right. So he kept letting the words spill out from between his lips, and prayed that somehow he could at least alleviate her heartbreak.

There were so many things he could say; that he wished he could take it back, but that would be a lie. He just wished that maybe he would have told her sooner, or maybe broken up with her when he knew he still had feelings for Korra.

"I really didn't mean to hurt you." Spirits, that just sounded like another horrible line from those crappy movies. "It was never my intention to sleep with Korra." But it wasn't like he hadn't thought about it. "And I still really like you." But he was starting to think he may like Korra more.

"Then why did you do it?" Asami asked with a world of pain in her eyes. She had to try and make as much sense of this as possible. She was beginning to find all of the missing puzzle pieces and was slowly putting everything together, but her mind was still grappling for any piece of information she could get.

"I told you—we were drunk and-"

"That's not an excuse!" Asami snapped.

"I wasn't thinking straight!" Mako scrambled for any sort of cover he could find, but Asami was quickly robbing him of a playing field to work with.

"That still doesn't make up for anything!"

Mako knew she was right. It didn't matter what state of mind he had been in; it was still wrong and it still hurt her. He had to let her know he was willing to make it right, and that he was still willing to stay by her side.

"Listen, if you want we can try and work this out-"

Asami's head jerked ever so slightly from shock and her eyebrows knitted together. Did he really think there was anything they could possibly do to "work this out"? Did he really have the audacity to ask her such a thing after what he had done?

"Mako, you slept with someone!" Mako could see the rage in Asami's eyes begin to cover her initial hurt response.

"I know," Mako said soberly. He would let her get her hits in while she could; he deserved each and every one of them.

"While we were together!"

"I know."

"And got her pregnant!"

"I know."

"And it was my best friend!"

"I know!" He almost wanted to laugh. This was so sad it was borderline funny. She had effectively made him feel even worse about himself and his actions by separating each crime he had committed and making each into their own statement.

"If you think we can still 'work this out' then you're out of your mind," Asami hissed. She hastily pushed past Mako and headed for the door.

"Asami-"

"I don't want to hear it!" Asami whirled around. If looks could kill, Mako would have been dead. "There's nothing you could possibly say to make things better!" Asami placed her hand on the doorknob.

"Wait, Asami-" He knew he couldn't fix their relationship, but at the very least he wanted to cushion her heart. Mako couldn't possibly apologize enough, but he had to try. He had to let her know that he still cared, and that it wasn't that he was sorry that he got caught, but that he was genuinely sorry that he hurt her.

"This relationship is over, Mako." The words left an odd taste in her mouth, but an even odder feeling on her heart. She was fuming and wounded that he cheated on her. Yet she wasn't sad about losing their relationship.

If anything, she actually felt slightly relieved.

Without another glance in his direction, Asami slammed the door, leaving Mako in the echoing air of their fight.

Mako sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. Yeah, he screwed up big time. The last time he had felt this guilty was the first time he had stolen something, when he and Bolin were living on the streets.

It caused him to take a moment and reflect back on his history of mistakes. Mako ran his hand through his hair and closed his eyes.

He was beginning to realize that he was making more mistakes than the average teenage boy.

\--

Korra looked up from her airbending literature and over at the pile of wadded papers that cascaded out of the trash bin like disgruntled water. The pile had only gotten bigger as the day progressed, and she didn't have a single finished draft of her letter to prove her success.

She sighed and rested her elbows on her folded legs, allowing the book in her hands to slip into her lap. Writing letters shouldn't be so hard, but she found that she could no longer commit her mind's focus to the task for the rest of the day. For the moment, she found her mind venturing off to Mako. He was supposed to have come by the island by now. It wasn't like him to not keep his word.

Her hormonal mind immediately jumped to Asami Sato, and Korra couldn't help but feel crestfallen. What if Mako was late because he had gone to see Asami? If he had, then would he have told her about the baby?

Korra closed her eyes and took a deep breath. In and out, she instructed herself.

She was brought out of her thoughts when the door to her room quietly slid open. Mako slowly strolled in, closing the wooden doors behind him. Korra could see the events of the day worn haggardly on his face.

"Hey." She offered him a small smile. It wasn't much, but she hoped that it at least brightened his day just a bit. "You're kind of late," she chuckled. "It's nearly ten."

"Yeah, sorry about that." Mako smiled wearily and placed his hands back in his pockets. "I guess I got a little caught up with some things." Some things being his thoughts and his job, which he had eagerly thrown himself into after his encounter with his now-ex-girlfriend.

"It's okay, I guess," Korra mumbled as she glanced down at the book in her lap, still keeping the upturn of her lips present. She didn't have it in her to be upset at the moment; she was tired and her mind had been around the block with many worries of different colors. "By the way," she piped, "Bolin's staying the night in the boy's dormitory—he wanted to make sure you made it here okay, so we just said that you guys could stay the night."

"Thanks," Mako mumbled and gently leaned back against the door. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes. After all he had been through today, all he could really focus on was how tired he was and how beautiful sleep sounded. Yet his thoughts also lingered on the Avatar, who sat across the room.

Korra wasn't born yesterday—she could tell that her team captain was upset and had weathered something fierce. She didn't have the gall to ask him outright what it was that was bothering him. She didn't want to bring up Asami or their troubles if they weren't even part of Mako's current problem. Instead, Korra leaned forward on her legs, ruffling the literature on her lap, "So," she started frankly, yet gently, "…how was your day?"

Mako shrugged with a light-hearted smile on his face. He just couldn't be bummed about anything right then. He hated how he hurt Asami and he hated to see how pained and stunned she had been when he told her. But right now, he was away from that; tired and Korra only a few feet away. And he had to admit, it felt nice not to be in a committed relationship anymore; at least not with someone he wasn't passionate for. "Well, I'm single again."

Korra's face immediately dropped and she looked down at the covers of her bed. "So you told Asami?"

"Yeah."

Korra was afraid that this would happen. The last thing she had wanted to do was help tear apart Mako and Asami's relationship. Yet she was somewhat relieved; now she didn't have to feel so tight around Mako. It made her feel a little bad, but she knew that now she had no one to be jealous of. She pushed the thought to the back of her mind, feeling more upset about the relationship she helped break. "I'm so sorry," Korra muttered.

"Don't be," Mako answered quickly as he strode over to the bed. He sat next to her. "We both messed up."

"I know," Korra grumbled. "I guess I just feel bad. I feel like I'm the driving force behind everything."

"No," Mako said firmly, "you're not. We're both at fault here." He placed a hand on her knee; it felt strange to feel the frame of her leg through her baggy pants, but he wasn't complaining in the slightest. "We never should have gotten drunk."

"I guess you're right," Korra admitted while slumping her shoulders. She glanced over at Mako, who seemed to be focused on the floor boards. She wondered if he was kicking himself for everything that had happened, or if he regretted it; she was sure he did, because she did, too-to an extent. But she supposed there were some things she couldn't regret, and she could think of one right off the top of her head- making her flush a little.

She looked down at the floor and wondered just what she could get away with. She had avoided touching him as much as possible since he had been dating Asami, but now she could surely do little, friendly and innocent gestures. They were best friends, and she wanted to be comfortable as best friends, especially since they were going to be raising a kid together.

Korra wrung her hands, but Mako didn't seem to notice. She wouldn't know unless she tried.

Slowly closing her eyes, Korra rested her head against Mako's stiff shoulder. He flinched, and she waited for him to gripe at her; she could feel his neck turn against her head and his eyes on her. Yet Mako said nothing. Instead, he turned his head back to the floor. It surprised her even more when she felt the weight of his head on her own. Her heart fluttered and a tiny smile pulled at her lips.

Maybe she was just doing it to fill the little void of in her heart. Maybe she should be kicking herself for letting things like this continue, but at that moment, she didn't care. It wasn't just about how she felt about him-it was a sense of comfort and company; something they both needed at that point.

Korra thought back to what he had said. "We never should have gotten drunk." What else did the firebender regret? How often did he really sit on his mistakes and brood over them? The last thing she wanted him to do was feel guilty or lose sleep over them at night. Granted, they should have done things differently. She could admit to that; she had regrets, too. Did he regret sleeping with her…not in the sense that he had been dating someone else at the time, but that he had slept with her?

It made her gut clench and her throat go dry when she thought about how Mako might feel about that night. They had made a pact to never talk about it; the main reason being because Mako was in a relationship. But now he wasn't. She didn't want to go into deep detail, but she didn't feel that binding force which kept her mouth shut and her thoughts smothered. She felt like there were things she should say to put their minds at ease.

"So…" she started off slowly, "how much of that night do you remember?" She had expected him to move away from her and get nervous, but instead he just tensed and remained still.

Mako's voice was steady. "…Well…" He wasn't sure if this was a trick question. He didn't want to admit that he remembered a lot of it, and then have to answer more awkward questions. But he didn't want to lie to her. Lying always got him into more trouble than he ever wanted to see. "A lot, actually…" He bit the inside of his bottom lip and kept his eyes on the floor. He thought about asking her why she wanted to know, but a different side of his curiosity got the better of him. "You?"

"A lot," Korra answered evenly. "It's kind of weird because…" She swallowed, wondering if she should go on. "It makes me wonder just how drunk we really were, you know? Because I feel like I remember too much."

Mako felt an odd sense of relief and guilt twist in his insides. Relieved to know he wasn't the only one with vivid memories, and knowing that he didn't have to feel like he took advantage of her; guilt, because he had probably been aware enough to stop it and avoid cheating on Asami. But then it made him realize just how consensual and clear the event had been for the both of them. Maybe he had wanted Korra more than he realized and Korra had felt the same. "I know what you mean." He turned his head ever so slightly, hoping she would pick up a hint of comfort from it. He was a man of action before a man of words- though he could easily speak his mind. He should probably do more of it, too; action seemed to get him into trouble these days.

"I just wish that we hadn't hurt Asami," Korra murmured as she pinched and kneaded the fabric of her pants between her fingers.

"Me too," Mako sighed, keeping his eyes closed. He just wanted today to be over—to forget and move on. "But we can't really do anything but move forward."

"Yeah, you're right…" Korra answered quietly. The only problem with moving forward was that she didn't know where they were going. Sure, they would have a baby and raise it, but there were so many speed-bumps, dips, and turns that she couldn't foresee. Her entire life had been planned and laid out until now. Learn waterbending; learn earthbending; learn firebending; learn airbending. She had had a steady stream to follow. However, it seemed that she had taken a left when she should have turned right, and now she had no idea where she was going.

The Avatar wondered if Mako felt the same. After some thought, she realized that Mako had lived most of his life not knowing what was going to happen next.

Korra could definitely say that she hadn't foreseen having sex with her teammate.

Another blush began to creep onto her face as Korra considered sharing another thought with the young man next to her. It was an intimate one; one that was a bit more personal, and still regarded their night together a few months ago. She wondered if it would be wise to reveal it to him, especially since Mako and Asami had just broken up.

But hey, she was feeling pretty brave.

"Hey Mako?" Korra started off warily.

"Yeah?" he answered back simply. Maybe they would change the subject.

Korra lifted her head off of his shoulder. When his ochre eyes fell on her she could feel the heat rise in her cheeks. "I guess I just wanted to say…" She paused. She really hoped this wouldn't come out sounding weird. "Even though we hadn't planned on it…and even though we were drunk…" She scraped up enough bravery to look him in the eyes. "I'm glad my first time was with you." Korra looked down immediately after saying it, not wanting to see Mako's expression.

Mako's heart raced, and he could have sworn it even grew a little from the sudden shot of joy. So she didn't regret sleeping with him? The girl he liked –and he would admit that he really liked Korra- didn't feel repulsed or put off by doing something like that with him. In fact, she even seemed to be blushing and embarrassed for saying it; almost like she enjoyed it. "W-wow." He cleared his throat, trying to keep his racing heart from darting out of his mouth. "Really?"

"Well, yeah." She looked back up at him and smiled at the startled look on his face. He looked almost hopeful, and that gave her the courage to go on. "You're my friend –practically my best friend- and I'm glad that I could do something so…um…intimate with you." She rubbed her arm with some uncertainty. "You know, like I can really trust you."

He wasn't sure if he should feel just a little let down for being referred to as just a friend –albeit a best friend- but he decided he shouldn't really fret over it.

Mako was about to speak up, but Korra's confidence plummeted. "But you know…you must have seen plenty of girls like that before." She tried to keep the conversation going smoothly, but the disappointment dripped slowly into her voice like warm honey. She probably couldn't compare to any of the other girls he'd been with; she knew she couldn't with Asami. While Korra knew she wasn't unattractive by any means, she still felt inferior to girls like her.

Mako was taken aback by the sudden change, but he didn't think too much of it. He was more focused on trying to bring Korra's self-esteem back up, and what the Avatar was insinuating. "Um, actually…not as many as you might think." He could feel an embarrassing heat crawl onto his face. This wasn't something he talked about much with anyone; Bolin was probably the only one who knew of his track record.

His track record being Korra.

Korra released a light, breathy chuckle; it almost sounded like it was filled with a hint of bitterness and fatigue. However, the smile that captivated her lips told Mako that what he had said had made her feel slightly better.

He smiled at her, but soon his mind was engulfed with a delayed epiphany: "I'm glad my first time was with you."

It was Mako's turn to peg her with awkward questions. "Wait, so…I was your first?"

"Uh, y-yeah." Korra looked away. "Is that so surprising to you?" Man, she really must have come off as a tramp if people kept insinuating things like this.

"N-no!" Mako retracted. He brought his hands up into the air as if he were trying to grab words out of thin air. "I mean, I'm honored—o-or I mean…" The firebender sat still, realizing that he hadn't, in fact, stolen any words from the air around them, or said anything intelligible in response to Korra. He took a deep, quiet breath, and let his hands fall to his lap. "I guess what I'm trying to say is that you're so confident and fun to be around. And you're not exactly…" Geez, he couldn't stop the compliments once they started stumbling out. "You know…you're easy on the eyes." Mako couldn't look Korra in the eye—not with the blush he was sporting. In all honesty, he couldn't believe he had enough courage to tell Korra—in a way—that he thought she was attractive.

This was definitely something he shouldn't be saying right after he got out of a relationship. But it wasn't like Asami ever had to know. This business was strictly between him and Korra, and it was business that they should that sorted out a long time ago.

"Oh, uh…thanks." Korra looked down to her left; suddenly her foot poking out from underneath her crossed legs was the most interesting—or rather unintimidating—thing in the room.

"Anyways..." Mako swallowed. "I just thought that maybe you would have met someone before and had strong feelings for them and…you know…" It was becoming apparent to Mako that Asami hadn't been the only reason they hadn't talked about their night together. He was terrible at talking about this sort of intimacy.

"No, you're…pretty much the only one I've been with like that." Korra offered him a nervous grin and made eye contact with him from the corner of her eye. She looked down quickly. "I guess I thought I should let you know. I mean—especially because I had never done anything like that before, so I probably wasn't very good…" Korra crossed her arm across her chest and clutched her biceps.

Oh no, how was he supposed to respond to that? "Well, I don't know…" So far so good. "I mean, I remember stuff, but some of it's kind of fuzzy." Which most certainly wasn't a lie—Mako was done with lies—but he felt as though he had quite possibly avoided giving her an adequate answer. Because Spirits…he could remember her moan and how her breathing quickened and hitched; how her fingers danced across his skin in a sloppy, yet hypnotizing manner. He could remember how it felt like she was about to bend the fire right out of him with just a kiss on the lips. The way she had kissed his neck and how it nearly made him fall apart.

Just the memory Korra saying his name is such a sultry way…

Mako was going to have to get out of there before he had to cross his legs and wait out a potentially awkward situation. "Anyways…" The firebender abruptly stood up and kept his back to his teammate. "It's getting late. I better get to bed." Mako didn't give Korra much time to respond as he quickly strode over to the bedroom door.

"Yeah…me too." Korra watched Mako with upturned eyebrows. His sudden need to get out of the room concerned her. Great. I must have made things really awkward…I shouldn't have said anything.

"Goodnight," Mako said as he slid the door open. He didn't dare look over his shoulder at her; he had a feeling that the look on his face might spark some questions that he couldn't bring himself to answer without his face combusting from heat.

"Night…" Korra answered. Her bedroom door shut, and Korra was left alone. The air that had been resonating between them hung awkwardly around her, and she had no idea what to make of it. She sighed, feeling like she was the reason he had fled the room so suddenly.

"Maybe I'm thinking too much." Korra shrugged and pouted slightly. She took a moment to let other thoughts invade her mind. For all she knew, Mako might have really just been tired. Maybe he had other things he needed to take care. There was a large array of reasons why Mako left so suddenly. Maybe she was just worrying too much—though she doubted it. But if she had been the reason he left, there was no point in fretting over it for now. If it still bothered her in the morning, then she would ask him about it; but for the time being she would just brush it off.

Korra looked off to the side at the pile of rejected letters that consumed her trashcan. The Avatar sighed and hung her head.

She supposed she'd save the letter for tomorrow's worries.

\--

A deep breath settled in Mako's lungs and his back relaxed against the hall's wall. Closing his eyes, he tried to let go of the previous panic and the memories that often plagued his dreams and fantasies. He tried to keep himself calm and not let it escalate. Think of something else…

Mako's memories drifted to Asami Sato and the look on her face as he apologized for his unfaithfulness. His mind then drifted to how his life was about to change, and he once again found himself recounting the mistakes he had made in his life.

Korra being his first still wasn't counted.

Sighing, he calmed down, but became plagued with familiar problems. Pushing himself off of the wall, Mako walked away from Korra's door.

The night was for sleep; like Korra, he'd save his problems for tomorrow's worries.


	9. Little Bender

Chapter 9: Little Bender

Korra stared up at her ceiling with dull eyes. She wasn’t ready to get up and face the day. Her body felt heavy and her eyelids wanted to close and whisk her back to the land of sleep. But sleep was elusive, and she realized that she was probably up for the day.

Sitting up, the Avatar sighed and relished in the calmness in her stomach. As of late the morning sickness had slowed and she was able to hold down her food. Korra’s relief was quickly staunched when she caught site of the ever-growing mountain of wadded papers engulfing her trash bin. It had been a week since she tried writing the first letter to her parents; since then she had made draft after draft and thrown each and every one of them unceremoniously into the bin.

Korra slouched and rested her elbows on her thighs. She was into her fourth month, and she had known about the child growing inside of her for a little over a month now. It was past due to tell her parents, but she couldn’t find the words appropriate enough for a hand written message.

There was no good way to tell her parents, just like there hadn’t been a good way to tell Mako or Tenzin. All Korra knew was that the best thing to do was to find the least damaging way possible and be upfront.

Feeling a small flash of confidence shoot through her body, Korra puffed her chest out with a deep breath and pushed herself from her bed to the small desk at the side of the room. She sat down with a pen and a clean sheet of paper, but the minute the pen hovered over the paper, she found herself in the same predicament she had been dealing with for the past week.

She raised an eyebrow and glanced down at her stomach with a wry smile, “Hey, kid,” Korra grumbled as she propped an elbow on the desk. “Can’t you just come out here and write this for me?”

Korra could already tell what the outcome of this letter was going to be.

One-way ticket to the trash bin, coming right up! --

Asami’s room had never felt so quiet, and her thoughts had never sounded so loud. Memories of words, and signals she missed swarmed loudly in her brain like bumble flies.

She wanted to sear this wound shut; sew them, freeze them—anything to stop the pain she was feeling in her chest and stomach. No matter how much she tried to push the images out of her head—pictures of Mako and Korra smiling together, and what they could have been doing behind her back—they just kept coming back. Asami found she couldn’t sleep well, and as she went about her days she tried her hardest to distract herself. But she was finding it difficult to keep her mind off of her former boyfriend and her now-pregnant best friend. She wasn’t even sure if she could still call Korra her best friend.

Why hadn’t she heeded the signals? They were so obvious—the way Mako and Korra smiled at each other, the way they looked at each other, the way they talked together and the way their body language changed. She had detected it, but chose not to acknowledge it. Thinking back, she assumed that she had just had more faith in the two of them. Mako didn’t seem like the kind of guy to cheat; he was honest, loyal, and selfless. He had been so enamored with her that Asami had thought he would have stayed and not ventured off to another girl.

Asami had told herself similar lies about Korra. Even though Asami knew of Korra’s infatuation with Mako, she just figured that Korra would move on or she would focus more on her duties as the Avatar. And she and Korra were becoming such good friends; she had thought there would have been some sort of unspoken code between them that said, “don’t sleep with my boyfriend.”

“They were drunk…” She knew they wouldn’t go behind her back like that if they hadn’t been. Asami would give them that much, but their being intoxicated hardly got them out of trouble with her. What mattered was that they got drunk together in the first place. What mattered was that they could have put the cups down and stopped before things got too far. What mattered, and what hurt Asami the most, was that they still had feelings for each other.

She should have seen it coming.

Asami sighed; she couldn’t beat herself up over this—she wasn’t to blame in the slightest. Yet, she still found that kicking herself somehow helped staunch her anger towards her friends.

Damn it, she was still so angry, but she didn’t want to toss these people out of her life. Asami hated that she felt this way, but she had just grown too attached to her friends.

She felt a bit masochistic for thinking of forgiveness, and wanting to keep her only friends. She should be completely red in the face over all of this and want to have nothing to do with these people. Yet she just couldn’t shake the forgiveness that was cultivating in her veins. She was still hurt, and she was still angry, but…

Asami could still see Mako’s face as clear as day. How apologies swam like holy koi in seas of amber, and how the guilt rested on each of his shoulders like crumbling statues. His voice sounded just as wounded by his actions, though she was sure her heartbreak held greater pain.

The heiress knew that her now-ex-boyfriend felt bad about what had occurred. She also knew him well enough to know that he had probably beaten himself over it for a while before telling her. Asami knew her ex-boyfriend well enough to know that Mako was selfless, and would be dedicated to fixing what he had done. He would step up and become the father he needed to be for his child. That was what Asami admired most about Mako—his perseverance and his sense of rightness.

Asami sat up in bed and stretched. She would admit that she still liked Mako, but she could feel the cinders of infatuation fading with each passing day. There was just something really unappealing—on a non-jealous and anger-less note—about a guy that you like sleeping with your best friend.

She was thankful, however, that she hadn’t been head-over-heels for the firebender. If she had loved Mako, and found out about him and Korra, she would have fallen to pieces.

Speaking of her best friend, Asami was certain that Korra was probably feeling just as bad as Mako. She might even be feeling worse than Mako, considering Korra was pregnant. That consequence aside, Asami knew all too well that Korra wouldn’t have gone behind her back just to hurt her. Miss Sato sighed, and just chalked it all up to just being a really unfortunate, painful, and unintentional circumstance. She didn’t have enough energy in her to keep questioning all of the whys and hows over and over again.

Asami’s mind wandered though. It jumped back and forth between anger, pain, and sadness. If she were to truly move on, perhaps it would be better if she at least talked to Korra. Once she did that, then she could evaluate her options. She could decide if she still wanted to keep these people as her friends—if it would hurt or benefit her to do so. It would help her mind rest easy knowing both sides of the story. And she hated to admit it, but she felt that seeing the guilt in Korra’s eyes could help her come to terms with all that had happened, and allow her to heal.

She didn’t want to see her friend in any sort of pain, but she needed to know that her friend did, in fact, feel as guilty as she thought. Asami needed to know that Korra really didn’t mean it, and that sleeping with Mako really was unintentional.

Asami stood up from her bed and sighed. Seeing Korra was going to take some willpower. She didn’t feel like facing her friend after all of this, but she also didn’t want to see the proof. Asami didn’t know how she would feel when she saw the baby bump the Avatar was sure to have; her ex-boyfriend’s baby; her best friend’s baby. Would she be able to handle seeing it? Would she feel spite towards Korra and the baby? Asami didn’t want those feelings. Maybe it would be best to wait until after the baby was born. No, Asami didn’t want to wait that long. Besides, Korra might need this closure just as much as she did.

Korra might actually need her support, and Asami found that she might be willing to give it if she actually talked things out with her.

Taking a deep breath, the heiress made the resolve to herself. She would go talk to Korra; keep her eyes locked with hers and get straight to business. Asami would let the Avatar know just how upset she was, and once she said what she needed to say, then she would decide where to go from there.

To stay friends or to take separate paths.

Asami was already pretty sure of what the answer was.

\--

All had been calm for the first time in a while at the Air Temple. Things had almost seemed to go back to normal, and Korra could feel her health returning. That is, until Pema dropped a bit of a bombshell on her:

“Korra, do me a favor and put Rohan to sleep, will you?”

Korra looked up from her half-eaten rice ball and froze mid-chew. She swallowed the article of food, feeling it go down her throat in a rough manner. She cleared her throat. “Um…”

“You need the practice,” Pema reminded with a sweet smile. “You’re going to have one of your own soon.”

“Right…” Korra grumbled, eyebrows pinching together in worry. She glanced down at her food, which suddenly didn’t seem as appetizing as it had mere moments ago. The Avatar had managed to forget about her impending motherhood for a while and had felt almost normal for the first time in a month. Luck had smiled upon her; she hadn’t heard a word of baby talk in the past few days. The days fell in a pattern: she woke up, got sick, ate breakfast, did her airbending training. Around noon she ate lunch, got sick again, and helped Pema around the house. In the evening, Mako usually came by either before or after dinner. Then she meditated, got sick one last time, and then went to bed. Even with new symptoms coming up what seemed like every day, she still felt more at ease.

“Why don’t you go sit in the other room on the futon and try and get him to sleep?” It wasn’t much of a suggestion, because Pema immediately handed Korra the fitful infant.

“Sure.” Korra stood up and awkwardly took the baby into her arms. It always felt weird holding a baby. She hadn’t had much experience with one; the only one being Rohan. She felt like she was handling a delicate artifact that could crumble at any moment.

She looked up from Rohan and saw the two airbending girls staring at her curiously from their spots at the table. Suddenly Korra couldn’t get out of the room fast enough. If she weren’t pregnant, then their stares wouldn’t have bothered her. She could have easily tried to put Rohan to sleep right then and there. But the fact of the matter was that she was pregnant, and she felt hypersensitive to their stares; their wonder and their judgment.

Pushing herself off of the floor, Korra quickly exited the room. As she was leaving she heard Ikki and Jinora ask their mother if they could help put their little brother to sleep.

“No, I think she needs to try on her own.”

“But we could help!”

“I know you could, but she needs to learn since she’s going to have one of her own soon. And I don’t think she’s too comfortable with all of this yet. Give her some space.”

Oh, Korra was going to have to hug the putty out of that woman. She was glad Pema was on her side and seemed to understand.

Rohan squirmed in Korra’s arms and earned her attention. It felt alien holding Rohan, or any baby for that matter. She had only ever held him once before; it had been shortly after he was born, and she had been sitting down to make sure she didn’t screw up and drop him or something, and Pema had been there to supervise her. Before Rohan, she had never even held a baby before. Her experience with children was almost completely limited to watching mothers interact with their children on the streets. She had helped Katara deliver a baby before, but Korra had been much younger and she had tried her best to blot the graphic details from her pristine memory.

Anxiety bustling in the pit of her stomach, Korra looked down at the baby in her arms. “You know,” she started with an innocent pout, “I’m not sure how Pema expects me to get you to sleep, especially since I’ve barely even held you before.” Korra looked around for a moment, hoping no one was listening in on her conversation with the baby. Her blue eyes caught Rohan staring at her with curiosity. She smiled back at his green eyes. “But I guess we won’t know if we don’t try!”

Korra found the room was empty of human life. The room itself contained a small futon with a small coffee table placed before it. Potted plants adorned the corners of the room, and the window covers had been shoved aside to allow one to see outside. But what was most important to Korra, rather than the aesthetics of the room, was how quiet it was, and how no one else was around to see her fail at putting an infant to sleep.

More importantly, no one would be reminded that the Avatar was pregnant, and judge her on her ability to mother a child.

As she bent over to sit down on the futon, Rohan reached up and grabbed some of her hair between his fingers. Korra laughed lightly before gingerly prying his small hands out of her chocolate locks. “No, you can’t have my hair.” The airbending boys must have had a thing for girls with a full head of hair. Meelo almost always had something nice to say about Asami’s hair whenever she used to come over.

Korra’s faint smile dropped; Asami probably wouldn’t be coming over anymore.

Taking in a deep breath of air, Korra scrunched her eyebrows together. As bad as she felt about hurting Asami, she didn’t have time to dwell on it. She had more problems than she could shake a stick at, and she had a baby to lull to sleep.

Looking down, Korra noticed that Rohan kept his eyes locked on her. She scanned his face to see what he could possibly be thinking; he didn’t seem too hurt by not getting her hair, so she figured she was in the clear. And seeing as he wasn’t protesting or crying, then she must have been holding him right. His head was rested in the bend of her arm, while the rest of him was pressed up snuggly against her stomach and chest.

Rohan blinked owlishly and continued staring up at Korra. He didn’t appear to be the least bit tired. How did Pema get him to go to sleep so easily? Pema could literally get him to go to sleep in about ten minutes once his belly was full and his diaper changed.

“Come on, it’s time to go to sleep,” Korra encouraged quietly. Rohan blinked and made a few noises in response, but otherwise showed no interest in catching any z’s.

Korra wished that Pema would have at least shown her how to lull him to sleep. The Avatar had really been thrown to the moose lions for this one. She supposed that Pema had wanted her to give it her own whirl first, before getting any help. It was times like these where she wished she had watched Pema’s motherly charm more closely. Korra had never really bothered to see how Pema charmed Rohan to sleep, considering she felt like it wasn’t really important for her to learn right now. Funny how that worked out.

Still, Korra had to give it a shot. “Come on, Rohan, time to go to sleep!”

Still the baby didn’t respond the way she wanted to. Instead, he started to squirm, and his face twisted into one of discomfort.

“Ahh, no, no, no, don’t cry,” she pleaded, bringing the baby up closer to her chest. Maybe if she held him closer then he would feel more comfortable. Alas, he still squirmed in her grasp and made mewling noises of protest.

The almighty Avatar was starting to feel frantic. She could take on a whole mob of chi-blockers, but she felt completely helpless at the hands of a baby. She tried calling out his name and even tried making a few faces at him, but Rohan didn’t seem to find the humor in it. Korra tried bouncing him lightly to try and get his mind off of whatever was upsetting him, but to no avail.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. She could feel concern well up in her chest. What if something was wrong with him? What if she accidentally hurt him? She was a little taken aback by magnitude of these concerns; normally she wouldn’t have been too worried if Rohan was crying. Maybe it was because she was the one dealing with him, or maybe it was her stupid hormones trying to kick-start her into motherhood. Either way, she pushed them to the back of her mind and tried to figure out what he could possibly want.

Maybe he was just uncomfortable? He was lying on his back after all, and had been for a while now. Spirits knew she hated trying to sleep on her back. She knew babies weren’t really supposed to sleep on their stomachs, but she knew she could at least put him up so he had his head rested against her shoulder.

Gently, she repositioned the infant and pushed him up just enough so his head rested against her collarbone and shoulder. Sure enough, his squawks ceased and he went back to looking around the room in silence. Korra let out a sigh of relief. Crisis averted; now to get him to sleep.

She tried gently bouncing him again, trying to lull him into a rhythmic movement that might put him into a quiet slumber. When that didn’t work, she simply tried rubbing his back and just waiting out his energy. But when she craned her head back to see if Rohan had fallen asleep, he exchanged a look with her.

Korra sighed once more and continued to wait the baby out. She was sure she had more energy than he did. He would tucker out sooner or later.

The sound of the doors sliding open snapped her out of her bitter patience. She whipped her head around her shoulder, careful not to knock Rohan’s head in the process. She felt an odd sensation of relief and embarrassment when she found Mako standing at the doorway. Relief because he was home and could maybe help her; embarrassment because it felt odd holding a baby in front of him when they knew this was obviously practice for their near future. But the amount of embarrassment was small, so she easily pushed it aside.

“Hey, Mako.” Korra smiled. She felt her heart skip a beat as he made his way over to the futon. “Did Pema send you in here, too?” Korra couldn’t help but give him a sympathetic smile.

Mako smiled as he stopped to stand before the Avatar. “I guess so.” He leaned over to his right to get a look at the baby on Korra’s shoulder. “Pema said you might need a little help.”

“Yeah,” Korra sighed. “She sort of just asked me to put him to sleep, but she didn’t exactly tell me how.” Once again, Korra craned her head back to see if Rohan had fallen asleep, but instead the baby had turned his head around so he could lock eyes with Mako. The infant’s green eyes mercilessly scanned Mako without hesitation; Korra couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but she assumed all was well since he wasn’t crying.

“It can’t be that hard,” Mako started. “People seem to get babies to go to sleep pretty easily.”

Korra snuffed and pouted at the firebender. “Yeah, but I’m pretty sure that’s because they have experience under their belt—I don’t know about you, but I don’t have much experience with babies.”

“I don’t either, but how hard could it be?” Mako eased himself down onto the futon next to Korra and Rohan. The Rohan’s eyes never came unglued off of Mako, not even when he decided to lay his head back down on Korra’s shoulder.

Mako leaned back to get a better glimpse of him. He wore a soft, tired smile as he examined the baby’s pudgy face. It was enough to make Korra’s anxious heart melt and bring a smile to her face.

“Here, let me see him.” While he held a bout of confidence in his heart, there was more anxiety and uncertainty in his entire being. He had never really held a baby before—though he could slightly remember holding Bolin. But at the time, he had been sitting down on the floor, and his parents were there to make sure he didn’t mess up and drop his brother.

But he had to learn sometime, and he wasn’t going to put his foot in his mouth by failing to put this baby to bed.

Korra awkwardly shifted Rohan into Mako’s waiting arms. Rohan eagerly reached out to his new destination and readily accepted the new pair of hands that picked him up. Just like with the last person who held him, Rohan was placed against Mako’s body with his head on the young man’s shoulder.

Rohan pushed himself up and looked Mako in the face. He began babbling an intellectual conversation that only he could understand, but Rohan assumed that Mako was getting the gist of it, considering he was smiling back. Since their talk was going so well, Rohan placed his hand on Mako’s cheek, shoving it upward so that Mako’s eye closed.

“I think he likes you,” Korra laughed as she turned to face the two boys. She placed her arm on the back of the futon and rested her cheek against her fist.

Mako looked at her from the corner of his amber eye, his smile never faltering.

Korra’s heart fluttered for a brief second and her smile grew.

Damn it, he really looked good with kids. She wasn’t sure what it was; maybe it was Rohan’s soft, rounded face next to Mako’s more angular and sharper features, or how Mako’s usually tired and hardened eyes were sparkling with mirth. There was just something really attractive about Mako with a baby.

She quickly bit her lip to prevent a blush from forming and to shut off the thought of Mako being the father of their expectant child. Knowing that he would be holding their baby by next year just made her toes curl and her stomach do somersaults. It was enough to momentarily smother the anxiety that was ever present in his gut and let her catch a glimpse of the positives that could come out of all of this.

“I don’t think he’s tired,” Mako stated as Rohan squirmed around in Mako’s arms enough to plant his feet on Mako’s thighs. He gripped Mako’s coat and scarf between his small fingers and tried to climb on top of the young man.

“That’s the problem!” Korra sighed as she snapped out of her musings. “I’ve tried talking to him, making funny faces, changing his position, and even bouncing him a little, but nothing worked!” She crossed her arms over her chest and stuck out her bottom lip.

Mako easily plucked the child off of and then readjusted him back into a resting position against his chest. Something told him it wouldn’t last long before Rohan decided to go on another hiking adventure on Mt. Mako.

“Well, I don’t think making funny faces at him would tire him out.” Mako smirked at the mother-to-be. Rohan, once again, started gripping at Mako’s clothes and pulling himself up. And, once again, Mako pulled him back down. He would be a pro at this before the night was over.

“Oh, well, since you think putting a baby to sleep is so easy, then why don’t you give me a demonstration, hot shot?” Korra said snidely. There was no way Mako knew more about babies than she did. Even if he did look good with babies, she could still tell he was just as uncomfortable as she was when it came to handling and dealing with them.

“I think I will.” Mako glanced at Korra defiantly before turning his attention to Rohan. This was no longer about putting a baby to sleep. Now it was about answering to the Avatar’s daring tone and keeping his pride intact.

He was completely adamant about taking the challenge, but once his eyes landed on Rohan, he realized that he had no inkling of how to go about winning. This kid was bright-eyed and alert and wouldn’t go down without a fight.

“Come on, Rohan.” Mako gave the baby a slight boost so that their eyes were level with each other. “It’s time for you to go to bed.” His outward confidence didn’t persuade the baby in the slightest. Instead, Rohan just stared at him blankly.

Mako looked at Korra, who was smiling at him with all the cockiness in the world. She had already counted him out.

Okay, well, babies were people, so they must go to sleep like people, right? Mako thought about what he needed to fall asleep at night: blanket, peace and quiet, a pillow, and a darkened room. He was pretty sure babies didn’t use pillows, but he was pretty sure they needed everything else.

“Does he have a blanket anywhere around here?”

“There’s probably one in his room,” Korra answered. “Pema has a whole stack of them next to the rocking chair.”

Mako stood up and turned to face Korra. “Here, take him for a second. I’m gonna go get one.”

“’Kay.” Korra held out her arms and found that she took the infant with much greater ease than she had before. It still felt strange and slightly distressing, because he felt so awkward coming into her arms, but once she had him held against her, it almost felt natural. It made her feel a little bit better; at least she could get the hang of holding a baby.

In her small reverie, Mako had gone to Rohan’s room and come back with a blue blanket held loosely in his gloved hand. He had stopped for a brief moment and allowed the site before him to sink in. He had always thought that Korra with a baby would be strange—a site he assumed would be alien and out of place. Yet what he saw before him was just the opposite.

The air around the Avatar was still one of uncertainty, but it held a positive gust about it. Mako could see the fear in her eyes, but there was hope and relief that seemed to make them sparkle around her pupils. The way her hand brushed down Rohan’s back wasn’t rough or casual, but it was gentle and comforting; caring, just like a mother.

Mako could feel his heart swell and his jaw drop ever so slightly. He wasn’t sure if his breath had been taken away; it was strange how Korra didn’t need to be an airbender to do that to him. It was in that moment that Mako could see things a bit more clearly, and what might be in store from them.

He couldn’t help but feel that things were really, genuinely going to be okay.

Korra looked up to see Mako standing forlornly at the other end of the futon. He seemed like he was in a trance, and the fabric of the blanket barely held onto the tips of his fingers. She offered him a tilted smile and she quietly wondered if she was doing something wrong. “Is everything okay?”

“Y-yeah.” Mako snapped out of his thoughts and held the blanket out to Korra. “Go ahead and wrap him up in this.” He looked around as Korra took the blanket from him. “Where’s the light switch?”

“Should be next the door you came in, but it’s a dim-switch.”

“Even better.” Mako strode over to the door and found the switch hidden behind a plant. He pushed the tab down until the room was almost dark. There was just enough light to see, but enough darkness to lull a baby to sleep; he hoped, at least.

Mako returned to the futon and made a split second decision to sit hip to hip with Korra. He would say it was so he could be closer to Rohan and make sure the baby got to sleep, but he had to admit to himself that it was mostly just to be closer to Korra.

“Here, I’ll take him.” Mako motioned for Korra to hand the baby over, but Korra shook her head with a smile.

“I think he’s calming down. He’s still right now.”

Mako leaned over slightly to see if what Korra said was true. Rohan’s eyes were still wide open, but there was a hint of recognition in his green eyes. He must have realized that when the lights go out then it’s about time to go to sleep. “You think we should just wait him out now?”

“We can try.” Korra shrugged.

The two teens fell into an uncomfortable silence as they waited for the child in Korra’s arms to doze off. They both tried to focus on other things as they waited; anything but the heat the other radiated, and how their thighs and hips felt against each other.

Korra was a little surprised by Mako’s choice in proximity, but she simply brushed it off as wanting to be close to Rohan to help him get to sleep.

She was definitely glad for the darkness of the room, or else Mako would be able to see her flush. She was hyperaware of the feeling of Mako’s hip and thigh against her, and she could swear all of her feeling had flitted to her side to take hold of Mako’s touch and heat. He was so warm. Her mind flitted back to that night when it all began; how his skin felt like an iron brand against her skin, and how intoxicating his weight felt on her. How he moaned her name in such an unadulterated, husky manner, “Korra…”

Korra abruptly took a noisy, deep breath to try and regain the sense that Mako always seemed to suck out of her. He didn’t even have to try, all he had to do was sit next to her to make her head whirl.

“Are you alright?”

Mako’s concerned voice made her head snap around. She couldn’t bear to hold his gaze—not without her face turning red and the familiar stinging feeling on flustered tears in her eyes. “Y-yeah, I’m fine.”

Now wasn’t the appropriate time to think about that night; there was never an appropriate time to think about that. But Korra found it increasingly more difficult not to reflect on it now that Mako wasn’t with Asami. It made her feel less guilty to thinking about it, and now that Mako wasn’t in a relationship, the agreement never to speak about that night was off. Now that it no longer felt as taboo, Korra found herself thinking about it more and more.

Korra tried to distract herself by checking to see if Rohan had fallen asleep. Alas, the baby was still wide-eyed. “Hey, go to sleep,” she lightly commanded.

“He still hasn’t fallen asleep?” Mako asked and inspected for himself.

“No,” Korra answered and worried her bottom lip with her teeth. It was starting to concern her; not so much because she couldn’t get Rohan to go to sleep, but rather for her future as a mother. What if she couldn’t get her own child to go to sleep—not just once, but any time it needed to go to bed? Putting an infant to bed shouldn’t be this hard, so why was she struggling?

Rohan rubbed his eyes and yawned, but he continued to stare around the room. His eyes latched onto Mako as he moved to get comfortable.

“He’s obviously tired,” Mako stated.

“Then why won’t he go to sleep?” Korra tried her best to keep the desperation out of her voice, but was finding it increasingly difficult. It made so much sense to her: feel tired, and then go to sleep—so why wasn’t this baby following that logic?

“Relax,” Mako replied. He could tell Korra was trying, but it was clear that she was having a hard time with this. Usually Korra excelled in whatever she wanted to do, and she had confidence in that. But this wasn’t exactly something she desperately wanted to do, and when it didn’t come naturally, it frustrated and worried her.“Do you know of anything Pema might do for him before she puts him down for bed?”

“Not really, I’m never…” Korra brushed through her memories with a fine comb and reviewed them. She remembered Pema doing the laundry with Rohan in a sling around her. Korra had passed them when she went out to go train with Tenzin. When she got outside she had been scolded for not dressing in her airbending outfit. On her way back in to change, she could hear a soft melody coming from the laundry room, but quickly brushed it off as she dashed back to her room.

“Wait!” Korra’s face lit up. “She sings to him!”

“She does?”

“Well, sometimes…” Korra’s eyes scrolled across the wooden floors for a second as her confidence dropped a tick. However, she looked back up at Mako with a light of hope in her eyes and at the edges of her smile. “I’m not really around them enough to know, but I know I’ve heard her a few times.”

“Then maybe singing to him will help.” Mako rolled his shoulders for a moment before leaning forward and placing his elbows on his knees.

“It’s worth a shot.” It pressed upon Korra’s mind that this would mean she would have to sing in front of Mako. She had sung in front of him before, but it had been in a sillier manner, and she had Bolin singing with her. It made her hesitant to even go through with the idea; just thinking about how this was more of a melodic and serious sort of vocal endeavor made her cringe inwardly.

She pushed her shyness aside and toughened up; this wasn’t a big deal—singing wasn’t a big deal! Besides, if she was going down singing, then she was gonna take Mako down with her.

“But you have to sing too!” Korra jabbed a finger in Mako’s direction.

“What?” He lifted an eyebrow at her as he rested his cheek against his open palm.

“You heard me—you have to sing with me.”

“Fine.” Mako knew there was no fighting with Korra over this. He might as well just go with it and see where it led them. “But I don’t really know any songs.”

“Uhh…” Korra thought back—far back. She hadn’t really heard anything Pema had sung to Rohan, so she had to dig back into her own childhood and remember what her mother sang to her. "I think I know one, but I can't remember some of the verses."

"What is it?" Mako inquired.

"I think it's called Little Bender, but I'm not sure."

"I think I know that one," Mako answered. His mind went back to the easier days of his life; when his parents were still alive and when he still had a home. He often liked to listen to his mother sing. She sung at any time of day, but he always went out of his way to hear her at night when she sung to Bolin. She always sung one song in particular that a lot of kids their age knew. Alas, he didn't retain the knowledge of the song's lyrics, since he had much more pressing matters to attend to and commit to memory. "Our mom used to sing it to me and Bo when we were kids."

"My mom used to sing it to me, too." She could remember the nights she spent with her mother around the fire or in her bed. Senna would hold her and sing in her softest voice for as long as it would take for her daughter to fall asleep. Korra always loved the feeling of being encased in her mother's arms and how soothing her voice was in the cold nights of the South Pole. Korra would often drift off, repeating the lyrics of the song in her head.

"You want to try that one?" Mako asked.

"We can." Korra pushed out her bottom lip to form her famous pout. "I really can't remember parts of it, though."

"We'll just try and work off of what the other knows and try to fill in the blanks." Mako glanced at Rohan again, who was still eyeing them bother curiously. "Do you remember how it starts?" Mako looked back up at Korra.

"I think so."

"Then why don't you start us off?"

Korra was about to open her mouth to object, but she clamped her jaw shut. She really just wanted to get this over with, and arguing and bargaining weren't going to help. Besides, it was just a song-- there was no point in making a huge fuss over it.

'Just take a deep breath and go for it.'

“Water will keep you serene and calm,” Korra started off nervously with a lyric. Once the first line was out there, she could feel her nervousness roll off of her, and she waited for Mako’s turn to pass.

“Fire will keep you warm,” Mako tuned in gently

“Earth with keep you safe from harm.”

Korra could feel her confidence and her memory coming back to her, and she continued into the next verse with Mako, “Air will chase away the storm.”

Never in her wildest dreams had Korra thought she would be with Mako like this—singing a soft lullaby to a baby that wasn’t theirs; singing a lullaby in preparation for their own unexpected child. She could see herself perhaps singing with him in a silly manner, just like she did with Bolin, but this was so far out of her reckoning.

Yet she found that she actually liked it.

There was something enticing about Mako’s singing voice. It was low, with a hint of its rasp, and it came through smiling lips and paired with tired eyes that sparkled as they held an infant’s sleepy gaze. How those amber eyes flicked to look at her every now and again to see how she was fairing and how she was gaging him in this moment; how his smile grew when he saw that she was smiling back at him. Getting lost in his expression, Korra found herself forgetting the things that made her most nervous. It was like she had permission to think about him for a moment and not about their impending parenthood. It made her think that if she could be a parent with him, and of his child, then maybe this wouldn’t be such a sour deal after all.

Korra tore her eyes away from Mako and looked down at Rohan. He was far more relaxed in her arms than before; much more like putty than a tight coil ready to spring. His green eyes were half-lidded, and growing heavier and heavier with each word that passed their lips. Before she knew it, the song came to an end, and Rohan was in the beginnings of sleep.

A few minutes of quiet later, Rohan was completely out.

“I guess I lost this round,” Mako whispered, looking up at Korra with a smirk and an amused sparkle in his honey colored eyes.

Korra could feel her heart fluttered in her chest and a light smile crested her lips. She glanced down at Rohan for a brief moment before looking back at Mako. “I think we can call this one a draw.”

\--

"Hey, Pema."

Pema was thrown off her guard when she heard the familiar tinkling of Asami Sato's voice in the kitchen entry way. She hadn't expected to see the Sato heiress ever again, except maybe in the newspapers. From what Korra had told her, Asami hadn't taken the news from Mako very well.

"Asami!" Jinora chirped from the table as she closed her latest favorite book.

"Asami, Asami," Ikki said quickly, as she jumped up from her spot at the table and ran up to Asami. "Did you hear, did you hear?" The airbender bounced up and down excitedly. "Mako and Korra are gonna have a baby!"

"Ikki…" Pema tried to keep the strain and terror out of her voice. She couldn't really scold her for spreading what she thought was 'exciting' news. They didn't want to tell the eight-year old that Mako and Korra's baby was unintentional, because she was still a tad too young to know those details. Besides, Pema hadn't really sat down with the kids and told them to keep the anticipation from Asami. To be fair, Pema hadn't thought Asami would come back to the island.

"Yeah, I heard!" Asami pushed as much enthusiasm into her voice as possible. She felt like she did a top notch job of doing so; Ikki didn't seem to sense any disappointment as she grabbed her hands and jumped up and down. Jinora was just now getting up to officially greet her, and she seemed none the wiser. Pema, on the other hand, seemed to catch on.

"Oh, Asami." Pema turned away from the kitchen sink. Quickly, she dried off her hands and readied herself to assist Asami—or possibly even Mako and Korra—in any way possible. "I didn't know you were coming over."

"Yeah, sorry about that." Asami smiled as she pulled her hands away from Ikki's grasp. "It's sort of an impromptu visit—one of the air acolytes let me in. I hope it's not any trouble."

"Oh, um, not at all!" Pema smiled nervously. The idea of Asami being in the same house when her ex-boyfriend and Korra were in the next room together made her edgy. She really didn't want to have to listen to a screaming match, or clean blood stains off of the wooden floors. "So…" she started a bit cautiously, "did you here to talk to Korra?"

Asami took in a deep, quiet breath through her nose and slowly blinked while nodding. She smiled lightly, a smidge of bitterness in the corners of her lips. "Yeah…" She opened her eyes and hoped that Pema could tell how she was feeling. "I am."

Pema leaned against the sink and smiled tiredly, all while offering the beautiful Asami a sympathetic smile. She could only imagine how difficult this was for this young woman. This was an adult situation, and she could either choose to be mature about it or throw a tantrum.

The latter was warranted, but the former seemed to be Asami's intention.

"Well, she's a little busy at the moment." The older woman quietly pondered if she should inform Asami that Mako and Korra were in the next room over, trying to put her son to sleep. It might cause her more pain to see it—or bring about a shit-storm. It would be better if Asami talked to Korra without Mako in the room, or even in the same vicinity.

"I'd only be a minute," Asami assured. She didn't want the poor woman to think she was going to murder the Avatar. This was going to be a simple discussion, nothing more. And by simple discussion, she knew that bare hearts might be involved; which could amount to tears, anger, and possible sobbing, but she hoped to avoid such graphic emotion.

Pema could easily decode that a 'minute' meant 'however-long-it-takes' in girl time. Even though Pema was pretty sure that Asami's intentions were good, she still couldn't scrape away the fear that the 'however-long-it-takes' might turn into a thirty-minute screaming match; or the shortest bloodbath in the history of the world. She knew she was overreacting, of course, or at least she hoped.

"I really think it might be best if you came back later." Pema crossed her arms and hoped that Asami could pick up on her quiet warning.

Asami did, but she didn't care. "I just really need to talk to her." Asami looked down for a moment, but looked away when she caught Ikki's curious gaze. She had to get it across to Pema that she needed to heal and to get things straight. She needed to find a sense of closure so that she could move on. "Please…"

Pema quietly observed the gorgeous woman before her. She was putting on a good act for the kids. To the kids, she just seemed like a friend desperate to see the Avatar. But Pema could see the crestfallen look in her bright green irises, and the weight that she wore on squared shoulders. She wasn't letting this get her down, but she could tell that Asami was fighting hard to keep up this charade.

Well, Pema supposed she couldn't deny the beautiful Miss Sato something she felt she needed, "…Are you sure you really want to talk to her?"

"Yes."

Pema took in a deep breath before smiling kindly at her daughters. "Girls, why don't you go meditate with your father?"

"But Asami just got here!" Jinora bleated.

"Yeah, we haven't seen you in forever!" Ikki quietly whined.

Asami smiled and crouched down on the ground to get eye level with Ikki. "Don't worry—I'll come by again some other time," she said as she looked between both of the girls.

"And then you'll play with us?" Ikki mumbled.

"Of course!" Asami could feel her eyes brighten as the girls smiled with glee. "Now go meditate like your mom said."

"Okay!" Ikki accepted with ease.

Still a bit reluctant, but with smiles on their faces, both of the girls headed out of the room, "Bye, Asami!" Their light footsteps could be heard down the hall before a gust of wind sounded, and the familiar noise of air scooters filled the building.

"No air scooters in the house!" Pema called, but her children were too far down the hall to hear. She sighed and placed her hands on her hips. They would get away with it this time, but only because she had more important things to attend to.

Turning her attention to Asami, Pema smiled and took a deep breath. "Okay, Korra's down that hallway and in the last room on the right." Pema pointed towards the dark hallway. "But I should warn you that I've charged her and Mako with the task of putting Rohan to sleep."

"Oh." Asami could feel her heart stumble back from the punch of Mako's name. "I didn't know Mako was here…"

"If you want, you can certainly come back tomorrow," Pema offered gently. "He'll be at work from noon until evening."

"No, it's…" Was it okay? Was she going to be okay if she saw not just Korra, but Korra and Mako together? She had planned on talking to Korra alone, but maybe she could ask Mako to leave the room or try to get Korra's attention before Mako noticed her. "It's okay." If she wanted to try and make this friendship work, then she was going to have to get used to Mako and Korra- whether they were an item or just friends.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

Pema could tell that Asami was tense about her decision, but she could also tell that this was something Asami needed to do.

Pema glanced towards the hallway and nodded for Asami to take her risk.

Solemnly, Asami took her leave to the hallway. As she got closer to the door on the right, she could hear what sounded like singing. It was a soft song; a man and a woman singing a little off key, but still in tune enough for it to sound soothing. She could tell from the way the voices mingled that they belonged to Mako and Korra. Neither Mako or Korra sang very much; their voices carrying a melody was foreign to her. It took her mind off of her aching heart and nerves for an instant, and piqued her curiosity.

Her heart started to race. This was it; she was about to see the last thing she wanted to see. She knew her heart was about to snap in half, just like it did when Mako told her that he cheated. She could feel her mouth going dry, and a sweat break out on her hairline.

Taking a deep breath, Asami Sato approached the open archway that led into the room Mako and Korra were in.

She froze in her place and her mind went blank for a split second, as she caught the backs of a young couple trying their best to lull a baby to sleep.

Both of their backs were turned to her. Neither of them had seen her, but Asami could see exactly what they were doing and how they were feeling, just by how they sat and how the lullaby sounded as it passed through their lips and into the room's cool air.

They sounded like they were smiling, and comfortable with each other. Even the baby, whose head was barely visible from where she stood, seemed to be put at ease by the sound of the two people close to him and their happy presence.

Asami tried to jumpstart her mind like a Satomobile, but to no avail. She tried matching the red cable of anger up to her mind, but nothing sparked. She tried matching the black cable of sadness up to her brain, but nothing kick started. Instead, she simply found herself mesmerized by the scene before her, and the sound of the song they softly sang.

Perhaps she could still feel a bit of envy, but over all she was left with the feeling of bitter sweetness nestling into her chest. That was her ex-boyfriend and her best friend sitting so closely together. That was her guy and her right hand girl singing to a baby. Those were her closest friends who were expecting their own baby. Yet she couldn't deny the swelling feeling in her chest, the one that made her smile and told her that this was right.

That was her ex-boyfriend and her best friend sitting together on a futon and slowly, even if they didn't know it, building a future together.

Asami wanted to break down crying; she wanted to run home and sob into her pillows and talk out loud, and pretend that her mother was still there to listen to her. But she was stuck in place, watching something bitterly beautiful.

Something that was bringing a smile to her face and tears to her eyes.

She had to let him go. He was never hers to begin with. And even though he did wrong by cheating on her, she still found that she had to respect this: what she was seeing, and what she was hearing.

She definitely needed to keep these people in her life. Even if they had hurt her, she knew that they could rebuild; forgive and forget.

"Are you okay?"

Asami looked over to her right and saw Pema standing warily next to her. She had a small smile on her face and upturned eyebrows that expressed concern.

Asami could feel the tears on her eyelids sting and bite to break free of the barrier she had built. She turned back to watch the two young benders, Asami smiled. "Yeah."

Pema leaned over to catch a glimpse of the scene for herself. She glanced between the young couple and Asami, who was fighting back tears with a smile. It didn't take a psychologist to know that Miss Sato's smile was as real as the day was long, and that it held everything Asami hadn't expected to feel, while the tears in her eyes held everything she wanted to feel, but couldn't.

The nonbender smiled softly and leaned against the wall as she continued watching Mako and Korra from afar. "It's just something else entirely." Pema nodded towards the couple as Asami looked at her in question. "The two of them, I mean. And what they're going through."

Asami nodded as she looked back at her friends and blinked back the tears. "Yeah…it is."

"That song they're singing is about to end," Pema stated quietly as she took in Asami's state of being. "If you still want to talk to her, then you can here in a minute."

Asami shook her head; her smile started to feel wobbly as her tears threatened to fall. "No, I'm okay—it's okay."

"If you want, you can come back tomorrow," Pema offered with a shrug. "Between noon and evening."

Asami nodded quickly before flipping her hair, in hopes that her tears would slide back into their ducts. "I'd like that."

Asami was about to head back down the hallway, but she stuck around just long enough to listen to the end of the song and the nervous quiet between Mako and Korra as they finished. She heard them mumble softly and could hardly distinguish what they were saying, but she could have sworn she heard talk of Mako losing and Korra agreeing to a draw, before the space between them was filled with small chuckles.

Yeah, she was definitely making the right choice.

Asami passed Pema and started down the hall, but she stopped and prayed that her tears would hold off until she got home, or at least outside of the Air temple. "Hey, Pema?"

"Hmm?" Pema answered back softly.

Asami barely looked over her shoulder and smiled the best she could so that her tears wouldn't fall. "Thanks."

\--

The Avatar could face gang thugs, chi-blockers, and the typical ruffian, and yet…she couldn't write a stinking letter to her parents. It shouldn't take anyone a week to write someone a letter—even if the news wasn't exactly typical. Mako was beginning to chide her a little whenever he would get to the island and remind her that she needed to send them a letter, to which she lightly snapped back at him before going back to fuming over how she was going to word everything. Mako had tried helping her, and he had come up with a few good things to say, but Korra still found that she was unsatisfied with the drafts they had created. She started taking notes on the things she needed to say and how they needed to be written, but she still couldn't get everything to flow the way she wanted.

Bolin had tried to throw in his two cents; some of his suggestions had been off the wall, and mostly the earthbender had told her things she already planned to say. Pema and Tenzin had tried, but their suggestions sounded a bit too mechanical when written on paper.

Korra just wanted to make sure she touched all of the bases, and made this as easy for her parents to accept as possible. She had to make sure she could answer most of their questions right away, so that they didn't have to wait on more letters, and she felt like she needed to reassure them that all was well—well, for the most part—and that she was getting the situation under control. She wanted the letter to sound like herself, so that they knew she was okay, but she also needed to sound mature enough so that they could rest easy knowing that she had a handle on things.

Nothing was coming out right, and no matter who helped her, it still didn't come out the way she wanted.

Korra let out a noisy breath through her nose as she slouched over the desk in her room. She glanced over at the peak of her wadded paper mountain. It was now up to the edge of her desk, and had flooded the floor around the waste bin.

The Avatar leaned forward and rested her head on her crossed arms. It was only one in the afternoon, and she was absolutely exhausted. She wanted to crawl back into bed and just sleep the rest of the day away, but she knew that she would get scolded by Tenzin for not doing her light exercises and meditation. She also knew that if she didn't get the letter written, then she would have to deal with Mako's blatant reminder: "You have to tell them soon!"

Korra sighed and closed her eyes. Maybe she could take a short nap at her desk; ten minutes and the maybe she'd be set for the rest of the day.

"Korra!" Pema's voice rang from a few doors down

Korra released a sigh through her nostrils—of course she couldn't take a short nap. "Yeah?" She tried to keep the agitation out of her voice as she answered.

"Someone's here to see you."

Slowly blinking, Korra allowed her mind to rake through a few individuals who might want to share her company. There was Bolin—he had nothing going on today as far as she knew. Mako was at work, so he was out of the question. Her stomach churned to think that it might be Tarrlok who was waiting outside for her.

Her body and mind were reluctant, but Korra forced herself up from her seat and trudged to the door. "Coming," she yelled with little luster. She supposed she could deal with Bolin; he might be a welcome distraction from her letter writing. A nap would have been better, but she supposed beggars couldn't be choosers.

As sluggish as she was, it didn't take Korra but a few seconds to maneuver her way down the hall. Upon entering the main room, Korra stopped short and was jarred out of her thoughts at the sight of Asami Sato standing idly next to Pema. "O-oh, Asami." Korra figured she'd never see her best friend again, and if she did then she assumed the reunion would not be pretty. "…What're you doing here?" The cautious trepidation laced her words like a pretty bow and her usual brave face was covered in uncertainty, like cheap plastic wrapping.

"I just came to talk." Asami held up a friendly smile, but even Korra knew that there was more beneath the deep red lipstick.

"Umm…" Korra was about to object, but Pema butted in.

"I'll leave you two alone. If you need me, I'll be down the hall in Rohan's room."

Korra was about to plead and make an excuse for her to stay, but Asami cut her off, "Thanks; see you later, Pema!"

The tension thickened as Pema left the room, leaving the two teens to face each other and their demons. Two 'former' best friends, as Korra saw it, who both had a thing for the same guy, and one who went behind the other's back to sleep with him—drunk or not—and now Asami was a woman scorned, and Korra came off as a pregnant wolf in koala sheep's clothing.

Korra could almost swear on her past lives that there was no way this was going to go well. However, it was Asami's calm demeanor that was making her reevaluate her inference. Asami swayed a bit back and forth as she looked at the floor and then out the window. It was like she didn't know where to begin. Korra could understand that feeling, but she also knew that Asami Sato must have had a lot to say.

She was an impatient waterbender; Korra was sick of wallowing in anxiety, and was beginning to become headstrong with it. She was going to break this silence's back and send it crawling back into the hole from which it came. "So," she started meekly, "I guess you're here to talk about…us?" Spirits, she made it sound like they were the ones who had the romantic break up. "And uh…my kid?"

Asami rolled her tongue between her lips and nodded fervently. "Yeah, that sounds about right."

Another silence lapsed over them, and Korra could feel the muscles in her shoulders and neck bunching up in preparation for a tirade of a betrayed woman, but it never came. Instead, the unsettling quiet persisted, and Asami kept looking around the room without even glancing at Korra.

Korra tried rolling her shoulders, but it didn't relieve the tightness. She swallowed and glanced at the floor before looking up again at Miss Sato from beneath her eyelashes. Here she was, sweating bullets, and Asami was just dawdling around looking out the window. It was like Asami was making Korra suffer in suspense before she tore into the Avatar for what she had done. But Korra was no fool; she knew that Asami was just biding her time and waiting for the right words to come along to say.

"So," Asami began out of nowhere, "how are…you guys doing?" Asami took a fleeting glance at Korra's abdomen and then returned her gaze to Korra. She could tell her friend was pregnant, even with the parka on. It was a little difficult to tell, but the baby bump was there. It made Asami feel…uncomfortable, to say the least. It wasn't even just because she knew it was Mako and Korra's baby, but it was more along the lines that her friend was pregnant and it had been so sudden. Asami didn't know how to treat the situation, but she did know that she needed to be careful, or else she really could kiss the remains of this friendship goodbye.

"Um…" Korra's eyes scanned all corners of the ceiling as she tried to calculate Asami's question and process a satisfying answer. "Fine…I guess?" Korra couldn't recall a time when she had wanted to crawl under a rock like she did then. It perturbed her anytime she caught someone eyeing her stomach; it reminded her of what was to come, and it made her feel as though she was no longer a person, but a mutated creature. She couldn't sense any malice from Asami, but it still put Korra on edge and she brought her arms over her stomach and grabbed her waist with her hands. "I mean, I've never been pregnant before, but I'm still getting bigger and I'm still miserable, so I must be doing something right…I think?"

"Right, no—you're probably doing okay." Asami waved both of her hands from side to side in an attempt to reassure Korra. She seldom made as many hand gestures and she was typically well put together and calm in most situations. But Asami had to cut herself a break, because she had never been in a situation like this before. "It's like you said, you're still pregnant. So you must be doing okay."

Another wave of silence hit them, but Korra fought back to swim to shore. "Asami…" Korra tried not to drown in her own anxiety, and tried to keep paddling once Asami's green eyes locked with her blue ones. "I know this has all been…" What word would do this circumstance justice and would satisfy a scorned girlfriend? "…stupid." Korra exhaled in defeat. She'd find prettier words later and kick herself for it when she did. "And I know that you're probably really angry, and if you want to just lay into me and call my every bad name under the sun, then I won't stop you, but I just wanted to say…" Saying sorry had never been this difficult. She tried so hard to look the beautiful Asami Sato in the eyes, but she just couldn't do it. "I'm really sorry."

Asami looked at Korra, unable to respond. She wasn't sure what she had expected her friend to say. Truth be told, she had come up with a whole script of the confrontation, but now she couldn't call upon it to speak. If that wasn't frustrating enough, Asami could feel her eyes burning with the familiar presence of tears. She hadn't planned on coming here to cry. She had planned on just telling Korra things up front, and allowing Korra to tell her the things she needed to say. But she hadn't counted on the way it would sound—how those words would flow from Korra's lips and imbed in Asami like a vaccine. It hurt, but she could already feel herself healing.

She found it hard to speak, but she felt it was easier if she didn't look at Korra too much; funny how she thought she could be able to come in here and look Korra straight in the eyes and tell her how it was. "You know, you really hurt me, Korra." She hated how it sounded; it sounded weak and resentful, stupid and childish. "You and Mako both."

"I know." Korra lowered her head and laid her eyes on the floorboards to her left. Nausea welled up in the pit of her stomach, and this time she knew it wasn't morning sickness.

"I still can't believe that you would do anything like this. I trusted you." And she still did. She would trust Korra with her life (Though she couldn't say she would trust Korra with her next boyfriend). She couldn't stay completely angry; Asami had realized quite a while back that Mako and Korra would somehow end up together, and that she was just the infatuation before the real fall. She just didn't think it would all come together like this.

"I'm sorry." Korra would never be able to say it enough. "It was an accident." Accident or not, Korra had still thought about what it might be like—touching Mako, kissing Mako, sleeping with Mako–what it would feel like to have him return all of those actions and so much more. "It was never my intention to hurt you, it just…sort of happened."

"Sort of happened…" Asami mused aloud.

Korra mentally kicked herself. 'Sort of happened' was one of the worst excuses she had ever come up with.

"So sleeping with your best friend's boyfriend is something that just 'sort of happens'?"

"Well, you know when there's alcohol thrown in-" Korra stopped when Asami's eyebrows drew together tautly. "I'm gonna stop talking now."

"No—I want to hear this," Asami challenged. She was willing to forgive Korra, but that didn't mean she was so holy enough to not watch her suffer first.

"I don't know what you want to hear!" Korra lifted her arms and then let them fall to her sides in exasperation. "I've already said that I'm sorry—and I'll say it a million more times if you want, and I'll mean every word of it!"

"I know you would!" Asami snapped back.

"Then what in the world do you want me to say?!"

Asami bit her lip out of spite and turned her head to look at the floorboards. "I don't know."

"Do you want me to say that I slept with your boyfriend and got knocked up? Do you just want me to list off everything I've done wrong up until this point and how much of an awful person I am?"

"You're not an awful person!" Asami defended rather suddenly. She hoped that it would make Korra feel better to hear it, but instead, the Avatar wasn't buying it.

"I slept with your boyfriend!"

"Yeah, you did—and I'm still really pissed about it, too!" Asami crossed her arms and tried not to bite her lip any harder or else it would bleed. "But that doesn't make you an awful person."

They were quiet for a moment, and Korra allowed for her agitation and excitement to simmer down. None of this was making any sense to her. She had planned on Asami saying every spiteful she could muster—and she was more than prepared to take it—but she couldn't comprehend what she was telling her now. "I think you may want to look up what 'awful' means in the dictionary—because I'm pretty sure that sleeping with your best friend's boyfriend sits right at the top of the definition."

"No— ugh…" Asami brought her hand to her face as she tried to gather her frazzled thoughts. She had practiced what she was going to say to Korra; she had created so many scenarios in her head, and had comebacks and passionate things to say in each one of them. Yet here she was, at a complete loss, and all of those fiery and compassionate words were down the street without a leash. She tried to get her thoughts together quickly, in fear of Korra butting in or making an asinine assumption, and making it harder for Asami to clear the path of rubble in their friendship. "Korra…"Asami sighed as she let her hands fall limp at her sides. "You're my best friend—I can't stay mad at you. Believe me…" She gave Korra a deadpan look. "I tried."

"Okkayy…" the Avatar answered carefully, "but I'm wondering if you've got the full grasp of this—I slept with your boyfriend." She reemphasized the words and looked at Asami rather dully. "I'm pregnant with your boyfriend's baby."

"Ex-boyfriend," Asami heavily corrected. "Mako and I cut our ties."

"Because I slept with him," Korra stated bluntly

"Because he went behind my back."

Korra threw her arms in the air. "So did I!"

"Yeah, but I'm not dating you, Korra!"

"But I still went behind your back!"

Asami threw her arms up in the air as well. "I know, but it's not the same!"

"How is it not the same?!" Korra barked.

"I don't know!" Asami sighed, dropping her arms. "Maybe it's because you expect your boyfriend not to go sleep with any girls, because he's supposed to be intimate with his girlfriend!" she could feel anger welling up in her chest when she felt tears pricking in her eyes. She was so sick and tired of crying. Asami quickly caught herself before she could upset herself even further. "And it's just supposed to be between us and he betrayed that…" She popped her hip out to her right and placed a hand on it. "I don't know if that makes sense."

"Yeah…it makes sense." Korra nodded as she processed Asami's explanation. "But that still doesn't make up for the fact that I went behind your back!"

"You're right, it doesn't," Asami snapped hotly for the briefest moment; she still wanted Korra to know that she wasn't happy about that. However, she dropped the anger off when she spoke again. "But Korra—we liked the same guy." Asami slouched. "Things were bound to get ugly eventually."

"But Mako picked you," Korra answered. Her blue eyes went downcast. "I should have respected that."

"And you did…until recently," the heiress answered dryly. "But it's not like you actively pursued Mako while I was with him."

"Yeah, because he picked you, so it was obvious he wasn't interested in me." Well, Korra wouldn't admit that Mako was at least somewhat interested, considering he kissed her back after last year's tournament. That was the only time Korra kept after Mako when he was with Asami. She just had to know if Mako felt the same, and if he wanted to change his mind. Of course, she screwed things up, but once things were back in place, she stepped back and allowed Mako and Asami's relationship to blossom.

Unfortunately, that kiss only made her realize how much she liked Mako. Sleeping with him, drunk or not, made the impression that much deeper.

"Honestly…" Asami's voice rose a pitch. "I don't think he knew what he was doing when he picked me."

"What're you talking about?" Korra's eyebrow rose. How could someone not know what they were thinking when they decided to date a girl like Asami? "You're great—I don't see how he wouldn't know what he was thinking."

Asami chuckled lightly. "Thanks, but I'm not saying that he shouldn't have picked me because of who I am." Asami shrugged. "I think he just didn't really know what he wanted."

"I'm sorry," Korra mumbled. "I feel like I've wrecked your entire relationship."

Asami sighed heavily and lazily kicked the floor. "It's not all your fault." She swung her arms back and forth for a short time while looking down. "To be honest, I think things were starting to go south even before all of this happened."

"I still wish none of this happened." Korra shook her head. "I'd take it back if I could."

Asami didn't respond. Instead, she crossed her arms and faced her friend. She put all of her weight on one foot and leaned to the side. She sized up Korra's posture, wondering if she could read what was on her mind. It was obvious she was intensely sorry, but it landed upon Asami's pretty head that, after having the conversation they just had, that Korra may not be telling the entire truth with her last statement.

It would hurt to ask; burn her like the hot hood of a Satomobile, but she wanted to know— needed it. It laid heavy on her heart and she frowned. "Would you really take back sleeping with Mako, though?"

Korra's eyes widened and she looked up at Asami. The hurt expression on the beautiful woman's face was heart breaking. As much as Korra wanted to lie—to tell Asami what she probably wanted to hear—she just couldn't bring herself to lie to her friend, not about this. Korra looked down; sadness and bitterness coated her eyes. She bit the inside of her lip, because even though she felt bad about hurting her friend, she couldn't stomp out the defiant boldness welling up in her chest and lie about something she held dear. "…No." Korra looked up at Asami briefly. "I would take back hurting you, but…" Korra looked towards the window and out across the bay where the arena stood. It was where everything had started, and had led to where she was now. "I won't take back the things Mako and I have been through together." It was something she felt sure of, something that didn't hurt her in the least to say to anyone—including Mako's ex, her best friend.

Korra quickly glanced over at Asami, but then turned away with a murmured "Sorry" exiting her lips. She was sorry that Asami was hurting over this, but she didn't feel the slightest bit sorry for not feeling guilty about Mako being her first, or even the fact that he was the father of her child. "I know that's probably not what you wanted to hear, but it's the truth." Korra kept her lips in a tight line, and her eyes flicked over to Asami's saddened expression. Korra waltzed over to the table in the room and sat down cross-legged; her ankles were killing her these days.

After a few moments of uneasy silence, Asami slowly and quietly walked over to the table and she gently sat down next to the Avatar. She placed her hands on her thighs and kept her green eyes locked on them; they were the most calming thing in the room, but she tried to keep them from fidgeting.

She almost wished she hadn't asked, but she had to know. She was certain that it was a crucial part of her recovery, and the salvation of their friendship. They needed to be honest with each other and get the facts straight.

Swallowing, Asami turned her head to look at Korra, and asked, "Because you love Mako, right?"

Korra barely glanced over at Asami. She was afraid of seeing a wounded expression on her face, but instead she saw a pretty smile sitting where a marring frown used to be. Sadness still lurked in her eyes, but they were also housing understanding and forgiveness.

Korra's eyes drifted down to the table and a pink flush tinted her cheeks as she pouted quietly. She furrowed her brows, hoping that it would chase away the intense heat that consumed her face, ears, and neck. "I think love is too strong of a word."

"Well, it's a strong feeling," Asami mused. She leaned forward to get a better look at Korra's red face, because such a site was rare, but Korra looked away and leaned farther away from her. She knew that she was going to get teased relentlessly if her face didn't cool down soon.

Korra, face still hot with embarrassment, flicked her blue eyes over at Asami. "Can we not talk about my relationship with your ex-boyfriend? You two just broke up."

Asami was glad for Korra's request to change the subject; she personally didn't want to think about her ex-boyfriend for a while. Even if she and Korra could make up, it would still take a while before she would be okay with Mako again. "Alright." Asami nodded and her eyes brightened considerably. "How about we talk about your baby?"

Korra threw her head back and was suddenly hyperaware of the ever-growing pudge in her stomach. It still wasn't horribly obvious, but even with her parka on, she was starting to show. Korra reflexively wrapped her arms around her stomach and leaned forward. "Ugh…"

Asami decided to ignore Korra's displeasure; she had a thousand different questions to ask, and she wanted answers. Nothing could quell the ember of excitement that sparked in her green eyes. "So," Asami started with a smile, "are you excited about becoming a mom?" Asami knew Korra wasn't exactly thrilled with the turn of events, but she wanted to try and lighten the mood and keep the conversation going.

Korra laughed a little. "At this point I'm just starting to accept it; I try not to think about it, to be honest."

"I guess that makes sense." Asami mused, "It is pretty big news."

"Yeah—it still overwhelms me at times," Korra mumbled as she gently brushed a few strands of hair out of her face.

"How is Mako handling it?" Her ex-boyfriend's name felt strange on her ruby lips; she even licked them to try and rid them of the feeling, but it only worked so much.

"Pretty well, I guess." Korra shrugged one of her shoulders. "Sometimes I think he's doing better than I am." Korra neglected to mention that Mako hadn't initially been on board the baby-boat, but she figured she could save that bit of information for another time. "He's just a lot more…calm and collected than I am." She'd seen Mako lose his cool, but all things considered, he'd been pretty calm ever since he accepted his near-future role as a father.

"Well, that's Mako for you." Asami placed her elbow against the table and rested her cheek against her fist.

"Yeah, but I don't know," Korra scoffed impatiently. "He just seems a little bit more accepting, and he's taking it all a lot easier than I am, not to mention he's practically a saint with kids—"

"By the way…" Asami's green eyes sparkled and escorted her sweet smiling red lips. "I saw you guys put Rohan to sleep the other night."

"O-oh." Korra's hand went to grab her arm instinctively. "You saw that?"

"Yeah, you guys did great!" she was proud that her enthusiasm wasn't forced; Asami had been worried that talking with Korra again would be insincere. "I bet Rohan slept through the night after hearing you guys sing."

"Thanks, but I'm sorry you had to see that…" The guilt burrowed deeper into Korra's stomach, and she was finding it difficult to, yet again, look Asami directly in the eye.

"Don't be." Asami shook her head. "You both need practice, right? Besides, I guess it sort of helped me accept things a little bit more—so no harm done, as far as that goes."

"I'm glad…" Korra smiled for a quick moment; Asami was taking this all in stride, and it was a relief to hear, but it still didn't fix her uneasy feeling towards her upcoming parenthood. "Yeah, we need a lot of practice…or at least I do, anyway…"

"You'll both do fine." Asami waved away Korra's discouragement as if it were a moth fly.

"How am I going to be fine when I can't even write my parents a letter telling them that I'm pregnant?!"

"You still haven't told them?" Asami's eyes widened slightly and her eyebrows rose in concern.

"No!" Korra answered bitterly. "I've tried and tried, but none of the letters come out the way I want them to."

"Maybe I could help," Asami offered. "I may have never written a letter telling my parents that I was pregnant, but I have had to write a few letters to my father's affiliates regarding Future Industries business."

Korra rose an eyebrow in skepticism. "How would that tie into telling my parents that I'm pregnant, though?"

"Well, sometimes I had to be careful just how I worded things when I wrote to those people." Asami put her hand behind her neck and flipped some of her hair back. "I imagine it's sort of the same with writing your parents, only you need to make sure you still sound like you and not some automated machine."

"Some of my first drafts sounded a little too formal." Korra looked away with ill-ease. "I just want them to know that everything is okay and that I can handle this. I don't want them to worry more than they have to."

"Tell you what." Asami sat up straight, placing her hands in her lap. "Why don't we try writing a letter, and see how it works out." It wasn't much of a question as it was a friendly gesture.

It sounded like Asami was more than confident that she could help Korra through this mess. Korra couldn't turn her proposition down, as Asami's eyes were bright and carried every ounce of willingness to forgive and forget about this whole thing. She was ready to jump back into a singed friendship and try her best to heal it and help it grow again.

If Asami was willing, then so was Korra.

It wasn't long before the two young women were perched, yet again, in front of the table with a piece of paper and a pen lying before them. Korra had given Asami some of her previous draft notes to skim over, and they went to work. Asami stated that the best way to start off the letter would be to start it off just as she did with all her other letters she sent to home. She then said that it would be best to ease them into the news, and once the news was stated, then she could go on about what had happened, how Korra felt about all of it, and what the plans were.

Korra slowly turned from Asami and eyed the blank sheet of paper with skepticism. Would that really be enough? What if she came off as too afraid of too placid? Or even too confident?

"It's okay to sound a little scared or unsure," Asami assured her, "because you are, right? Just tell them straight. Let them know everything you can and just be yourself."

It sounded so much easier when Asami said it. It made quite a bit of sense.

It's okay to sound a little scared or unsure, because you are, right?

Korra had always put up a strong front for others, and she knew that wasn't a bad thing in most cases, but she did know that she needed to be honest. She was scared shitless and didn't know what was coming next; but even if she was scared, she still needed to have confidence that everything would play out just fine, and she wanted everyone else to trust in that as well.

She needed to be honest and scared, confident and brave, and above all else, just herself.

She put down the first line of her letter and then stopped, hoping that when she reread it, it would sink in and settle well with her. Blue eyes scanned over the inked words and she found she could feel a few ounces of stress roll off of her body.

Asami leaned over and read what little Korra had put down. "See," Asami offered Korra an enthusiastic smile, "you've already got one line down!"

"Great!" Korra cheered as she firmly placed her hands on her knees. Even just a tiny bit of progress made her feel better. "Now can we take a juice break?"

"But we just started." Asami's eyebrows drew upward and a frown plastered her pretty face.

"I know, but I'm pregnant and having an insane craving for leechie juice." Korra shoved herself up off of the floor and made a beeline for the kitchen.

A content silence filled the air around Asami as Korra left the room. She released a chuckle and rested her arms on the table before her. Blinking slowly, she relished in the feeling of the room, and how some of her troubles were very slowly, but surely, lifting off of her shoulders.

It was when Korra came back into the room, all smiles and a glass of juice in her hand, that Asami knew this friendship would survive.

\--

_Mom and Dad,_

_Sorry I haven't written to you in a while—things have been pretty hectic around here lately. But I hope you're both doing okay._

_It's unfortunate, but this letter isn't about the 'how are you' and 'what's going on' jabber we usually pass back and forth. Some serious things have come up and I hope you can understand. I hope you can let me explain the best I can through this letter, and I hope you're sitting down for this._

_I'm pregnant._

_Look, I know you're probably confused and angry, and probably disappointed. But before you write me a letter demanding twenty thousand different answers, let me explain a few things._

_About three months ago, the Fire Ferrets won the match against the Tiger Seals. We were pretty excited about it so we went out to a bar—bad idea, I know. We got a little drunk. I think you can figure out what happened from there._

_Mako is the dad. Remember—I mentioned him in a few of my letters before; the jerk of a firebender who drives me up the wall? That's him._

_I really wish I could explain this to you in person, but this letter is just going to have to do._

_I know that this is a lot to take in. And I know that I keep failing everyone around me. But from here on out, I have to do what's right for me. Because I can only disappoint others if I'm disappointed in myself, right?_

_But Mako and I can do this. We've decided to keep it. No other option was right for me, and I promise I've considered alternatives before coming to my final decision; this is the right one. Trust me._

_Tenzin has said that I can stay on the island. I know you might not like the idea of me staying in the city, but I believe that it's the best thing. I still need to finish my airbending training, and I want Mako to be a part of this. Going back home just doesn't feel like the right thing to do, at least not right now._

_I know that this letter can't possibly convey everything you want to know. And I know that waiting between letters for explanations is inconvenient, but this is the best we can do. I promise you that everything is fine, and that things are calming down in some ways. I know you're probably feeling a lot of things, and it's okay. Even if you're mad, and even if you're disappointed or sad, then that's okay, too._

_Maybe it sounds like I don't know what I'm doing; that I'm making all the wrong turns._

_But I know I can do this._

_I have to try._

_I'll keep you updated, and I hope to hear from you soon._

_And you know, I hope I'm still your daughter when I get your response, and I hope that you guys don't kill me._

_Love,_

_Korra_


	10. Men's Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short, sweet, and just as predicted.

Chapter 10: Men’s Talk

Sleep was a precious gift. It was comforting like a blanket, and rejuvenating like the sun that pushed fire through his veins. It allowed him to reset his body, his mind, and his spirit. He would admit that he had been taking it for granted--especially as of late--but once he was in sleep’s tender hold, he remembered just how gracious and loving it truly was.

Spirits, he loved sleep. Sometimes he felt like he could just sleep for days--especially lately, with how busy he had been. Probending, working, going to the island every night to visit Korra, and then finally returning to his cozy bed to settle in for a short night’s sleep, before the cycle started all over again.

Speaking of resting in his cozy bed, his bed didn’t feel quite right. It felt a bit firmer. Now that he thought about it, he felt like he could see less light through his eyelids than he usually did in the mornings; the scaling windows of the attic often let in the entirety of the sun’s rays, and forced him out of bed with its blinding light.

Come to think of it, Mako couldn’t even recall crawling into bed last night. Why, he couldn’t even remember the walk home from the island.

Mako opened his bleary eyes and blinked the sleep away. He reined in his focus and exhaled deeply.

The ceiling above him wasn’t the one he was used to waking up to. This ceiling was much lower, and the construction of it was different.

What had he been doing last night before he had fallen asleep? He had gone to the Air temple after practice; he had skipped out on dinner completely, as it was late and he was far too tired to bother going out to get something. It was nearly nine when he got there, and when he did he just went straight to Korra’s room. She had been laying down reading something Tenzin had assigned to her. She all too willingly tore her attention away from it and placed her icy blue eyes on him.

Something about her eagerness to see him made his heart, hardened and tattered from the day’s schedule, melt and warm his entire body.

They talked for a while—about their days and about the little things, and before he knew it they were both laying on her bed, side by side, still talking.

Mako moved his arm and felt something keep him from stretching it across the bed. Looking over, he suddenly realized where he was.

Korra was next to him, curled up with a blanket pulled up to her chin. She slept in complete serenity; not a troubled line or worry on her face. Her hair was loose and splayed out across her pillow, and her breathing was slow and even.

Mako took a moment to run his eyes over her body. She was completely covered by the pristine blue blanket that always adorned her bed. Her legs were drawn up, at least as far as they could go. Her pregnancy was becoming more and more real to the both of them every passing day. She could no longer hide her protruding belly from peering eyes with her navy blue parka.

Pema had remarked that Korra looked a tad bigger than normal at eighteen weeks—to which Korra sighed so heavily that Mako could practically feel it on his weary shoulders. Jinora had overheard the conversation while she was reading, and quietly chirped with a wide smile, “Do you think you might be having twins?”

Korra groaned, and it took all of Mako’s power not to join her in chorus.

One baby was enough, thank you very much.

To their –slight- relief, Pema had assured them that Korra probably wasn’t pregnant with twins, but that the baby was probably just in an odd position, or that it could be because of Korra’s body build that she was a bit larger.

Dr. Tai had informed them at Korra’s last appointment, to which Mako managed to make, that she could just be carrying more fluid, or that it was a who-knows-whatsits—because as the doctor often stated: Every pregnancy is different.

Both had been about to let out a sigh of relief until the good doctor bluntly added, “Or you could be pregnant with twins. I don’t know.”

It only got worse when the possibility of twins was mentioned to Bolin, who then began prattling off all of the fun antics they would have if in fact there were two sets of little feet pitter-pattering down the hall.

Mako took a moment to look at Korra’s abdomen. He couldn’t even tell she was pregnant so long as she was cocooned in her blanket. She just looked like the….well, the non-pregnant Korra he had always known. Though he had to admit he was surprised that she wasn’t snoring lightly. Any time he ever caught her sleeping, she always let out these tiny snores. He smiled and shook his head at her before sitting up in bed.

He had come to the conclusion that he must have fallen asleep last night while they were talking. Korra probably hadn’t wanted to wake him, so she went and grabbed a spare blanket and threw it on him before going to sleep herself.

Mako rubbed his eyes and took a deep breath.

And boy, would he need that breath.

His mind wasn’t alert enough to register the knocking at the door, or the masculine voice that called out Korra’s name before sliding the door open.

Tenzin and Mako both froze in their respective places and their eyes locked onto each other like two frightened bull turtles. Mako—hair a mess, eyes still hazy with sleep and a blanket thrown over his lap—knew that this situation wasn’t about to play out in his favor. Tenzin—face flushing red with anger and eyebrows raised in disbelief—had already made the decision that Mako and Korra were in a whole mess of trouble

Mako needed that breath.

Because it might as well be his last.

\------

This was a situation Mako never thought he’d be in. Then again, he never thought he would get the Avatar pregnant and be preparing for fatherhood at the age of nineteen, either; but at this point in time—in the wee hours of the morning—Mako just decided to let the chips fall where they may with this one. After all, he knew better than to get between a hormonal and sleep-deprived Korra, and a flustered airbending master.

Once Tenzin had found Mako in Korra’s bed, he immediately dragged the both of them from the room and into the dining room. It was seven in the morning and everyone else on the island had risen to start the day. When Tenzin had discovered that Korra was sleeping in—again—he had made it a point to go and wake her up. He, of course, hadn’t planned on waking Mako as well.

Tenzin sat across the table from a disheveled Mako and a pajama-clad Korra. “I cannot believe,” he said, trying to keep his voice as level as possible, “that after everything that has happened, you would allow a boy to sleep in your bed.”

“Tenzin, we didn’t do anything!” Korra pleaded desperately. She really just wanted to go to bed. She was already a horrible morning person, but being pregnant was tiring, and being yelled out of bed by a red-faced Tenzin was an awful way to start off the morning.

“It doesn’t matter that you didn’t do anything.” Tenzin was trying his best to explain this to Korra as calmly as possible, but he was finding it hard to remain patient. He was still flustered and bewildered. “What matters is that a boy was sleeping your bed.”

“But why does that even matter when we didn’t do anything?!” Unlike her airbending instructor, Korra had no problem with letting Tenzin know that this matter was pointless and exhausting. She was grumpy from being woken up so suddenly, and she was prepared to let Tenzin know.

“You didn’t have to do anything!” Tenzin barked. His student was stubborn and thick-skulled; this wasn’t something that he was going to be able to easily deposit into her wisdom bank and expect it to stay and build interest. “It’s about the idea, Korra!” Deep breath in, deep breath out; reign in frantic thoughts and usher in rationality and patience. “A boy and a girl should not sleep in the same bed, let alone the same room, unless they are married.”

“We’re pregnant,” Korra deadpanned.

“You’re still missing the point. It looks bad to everyone else!”

“To who?!” Korra threw her arms in the air. “Nobody outside of this island can see us!” She brought her hands down and rested one against her forehead; the last thing she wanted this morning was a headache. “I just don’t understand what the big deal is—we didn’t do anything.”

“I assume that you didn’t, but that still doesn’t change the fact that it looks…scandalous,” Tenzin mumbled.

Korra released a frustrated sigh and ran her fingers through her tousled hair. The reasoning behind Tenzin’s side of the argument made absolutely no sense to her, but she couldn’t fight back if he was stuck on the ludicrous idea that her and Mako innocently sharing a bed just once was taboo.

Mako drew in a quiet breath and closed his eyes briefly. He could easily see both sides of the argument. Sleeping in the same room did look devious; but they also didn’t do anything, and no one had to know about their sleeping arrangements, impromptu or otherwise. He knew he was at fault, but he was having a difficult time sitting here listening to the student and master squabble about it. The arguing was drilling on nerves that were already cracked from lack of sleep. What made it even worse was that Mako had looked at the clock and realized that he had to be back at the power plant in an hour.

He decided to keep quiet, however, and allow Tenzin and Korra to have it out. Mako was used to Korra butting heads with Tenzin and challenging his teachings, wisdom, and tradition—but he had also seen and heard enough arguments to know that Tenzin was going to win this one, just like he had with all of the others.

“I know that you didn’t mean anything by it.” Tenzin allowed his sympathy leak through his angered dam as he watched Korra pout. But she definitely wasn’t out of the woods just yet. “But in the future, I would rather not see you two sharing a room—or a bed.”

Mako looked at the clock again. When he saw the time, he closed his eyes and took in a collective breath. He had to steel himself for another busy day, and engrave upon his patience the convictions and promises he had made to himself, to Korra, and their child. He would have let Korra keep arguing with Tenzin, but he had to cut in and excuse himself before Korra continued.

“Yes, sir.” He stood up from his spot and winced when he felt his muscles protest, and heard a few spots in his back pop.

“You’re agreeing with him?” Korra glowered. “Just like that?”

“It’s his house.” Mako shrugged as he turned toward the hallway. “And I don’t have time to talk about it—I have to be at work in an hour.” He took a moment to look over his shoulder at Korra; the sight made him exhale heavily, yet quietly, and his shoulders slump. He hated the look she was giving him; her blue eyes appeared larger whenever she gave him a disappointed expression. They sparkled as they flitted about his figure in a pleading way.

“You have to work again today?” Korra’s eyebrows were drawn up and her previously heated voice echoed dismay. “But you just got off of your last shift seven hours ago!”

“Yeah, well…” Shutting off the sadness Korra’s eyes pitted in him was the only way Mako was going to get anything done. “That’s the way the power plant works. I’ll come back after probending practice.” He walked down the hall, letting weary determination slowly pump through his tired, young body. He would keep going and force his tenacity against his throbbing muscles and aching bones.

Mako wasn’t a quitter, especially when it involved his pride and the people important to him—whether he knew them yet or not.

\------

“I think it’s moving,” Korra said rather suddenly in the quiet of her room. She and Asami were back to their rituals. Asami would come over and greet the kids when she first came in through the door. She would small talk with Korra and Pema in the living room before Korra would whisk Asami away into her room so that they could talk more privately. It was basically a girl’s getaway—just Korra, Asami, and Naga splayed out unceremoniously on the floor on her back.

They had gone quiet after talking about Future Industries and their latest plans for a Satomobile that catered to family needs. Korra had successfully diverted all attention away from her unborn child. Asami had tried to start small talk about the newest addition to the Avatar family, but Korra steered the conversation into a different direction each time. Asami finally took the hint that her best friend wasn’t going to talk about her baby anytime soon.

Korra had been laying on her back next to Naga, nonchalantly petting the polar bear dog’s side. She felt naked without her parka on, but Asami had practically ripped it off of her. The Sato heiress had chastised her saying that it was too hot outside, and still reasonably warm in the temple. It was apparent that Korra was overheating, so after arguing with her and getting nowhere, Asami grabbed the fabric on her shoulders and pulled it up over Korra’s head.

When Korra had said she had been wearing the parka to conceal her baby bump, Asami had said bluntly, “You can’t hide it under a parka forever.”

Korra had pouted and said that she knew that, but added under her breath that she could try. She didn’t feel comfortable walking around with her bump out for everyone to see. It was a reminder of what was to come—a public reminder of what she and Mako had done. It was even more unnerving to let Asami see it, considering it was proof that she and Mako had gone behind her back; that it was her ex-boyfriend’s baby. That aside, Korra was only just now getting used to seeing it when she was by herself. She’d even go as far as saying that she was a little interested in it and maybe even just a little fond of it.

In the midst getting used to her physical changes, and the gradual acceptance of her motherhood, she hadn’t expected to feel her baby move so suddenly. At first she thought that it had been something she ate; a small feeling in her abdomen that felt like popcorn popping. But it kept happening. Pema had told her that she could expect her baby to move anytime now, but Korra had disregarded the information, as she wasn’t ready to comprehend that her child could move.

Asami had looked up from the magazine she was looking at, a look of shock on her face. “What?” She hadn’t expected her friend—who had been completely evasive of all things regarding her baby—to so abruptly mention its developmental milestone.

“I think it’s moving,” Korra said again as she focused all of her feeling in her abdomen. She lifted her head ever to slightly to look at her stomach, but didn’t notice any visible movement.

“What makes you say that?” Folding the magazine, Asami sat up straight and looked from Korra to her belly.

“I don’t know.” Korra kept her eyes on her stomach for a bit longer before forfeiting finding any movement with her eyes and laying her head back down against the wooden floor. “I can just feel something.”

Asami placed her hands on the floor and leaned forward on her knees. Curiosity was sparkling in her eyes like stars. “What does it feel like?” She took a chance to look at Korra’s stomach; she could only ever do it when Korra wasn’t looking. The Avatar was almost always trying to hide it or had her arms wrapped around herself to keep people from staring.

“Kinda like…” Korra thought of a good way to describe the feeling. “Like popcorn popping or…fluttering.” She experimentally grazed her finger tips across the top of her small bulge. What used to be taut muscle was now a gradually hardening bump. Normally she wouldn’t dare touch it with someone else in the room—she barely touched it at all, even by herself—but her curiosity and slight concern propelled her to let her fingers touch where her child rested.

Korra waited to feel the fluttering against her fingertips but it never came. “I don’t think I can feel it on the outside though—like I can’t feel them if I touch my stomach.”

“Are you sure it’s not gas or something?”

“I don’t think so,” Korra answered unsurely. “I mean I think I’d know if it was gas.”

“I think I’d know if it was gas.”

Korra smirked and turned her head to look over at Asami. “So our friendship has reached the level of fart jokes.”

Asami nodded tersely and smiled. “Yeah, well, we both knew that it’d get there eventually.”

Closing her eyes, Korra laughed lightly and let her head tilt to her left. Spirits, she was glad she and Asami were still friends. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to keep sane without another girl her age around during these troubling times. It had been a week and a half since they began rekindling their friendship, and all had been well. Asami had stopped by a few times since then, just to see how things were going and to hang out.

There were still a few snags and knots they had to work through, though, as to be expected. They both avoided the topic of Mako like a toxic plague; Asami, not wanting to talk about him, and Korra, who just didn’t want to bring tension into their still-shaky friendship. Korra could still feel awkwardness whenever Asami would first come over. The uncomfortable air would clear within minutes, and seemed to disappear a little more with each visit; once they got talking, the fog lifted and it was as if nothing had ever come between them.

Sometimes she wondered what Asami thought about her unborn child. She wondered if she held distain for it, or if she felt different around her because she was pregnant. Korra would dismiss those thoughts once they would begin talking, though. Asami seemed to be more than eager to learn more about the baby and always tried to pry Korra to talk about it. Asami was really the least of her worries in terms of judgment at this point.

If only she knew what her parents were going to think about all of this…

Korra rested her arm back at her side and slowly closed her eyes as she recalled her letter. Her parents should have gotten it by now, and have probably read it close to a hundred times already. She couldn’t help but let her worries run rampant as she thought about how they must have reacted and what they were going to write back.

“Have you gotten a letter back from your parents yet?”

Sometimes Korra could swear Asami could read her mind.

“No…not yet.” Korra took a deep breath and released it through her nose. “They should have gotten the letter by now, though.”

“They probably have.” Asami looked back over at the magazine she has placed to her side. Quietly, she picked it up by its flimsy spine and gingerly opened it up, as if to apologize for suddenly ignoring it. “I’m sure they’ve written you back and the letter is on its way.”

“Probably.” Korra draped her arm over her eyes. It was times like these—the ones filled with anxiety and uncertainty—that she wished she could just close her eyes and will for everything to stop. But because she couldn’t, she would just settle for temporary darkness and, if time and comfort permitted, sleep.

“Try not to worry about it.” Asami nonchalantly thumbed through the pages; what had originally been interesting Sato Mobile articles now dulled in comparison to the talk she and Korra passed back and forth.

“I’ve tried.” Korra skimmed her other hand across Naga’s side; the feeling of the Polar Bear Dog’s coarse fur comforting her ever so slightly. “It just makes me antsy waiting to hear what they’re going to say.”

“I know,” Asami agreed quietly. “But it’s not like they’re going to stop loving you. I mean, from what you’ve told me, they seem like pretty great parents.”

“Yeah…” Korra knew her friend was right. Her parents were simple, kind-hearted, and reasonable people. They would never stop loving her—that wasn’t a concern. What did worry her was what they were going to say; the “you should have known better” and the “I can’t believe you did this” prattle that was sure to be scrawled in ink were the very things that made her eyes sting and her heart heavy. They had every right to ask such questions, because even she asked herself those very same things when shit hit the fan. But Korra was over it now. She wasn’t asking herself those things anymore. She focused more on the present now, and was slowly turning a shy eye towards her future with a child. She didn’t want to hear questions that had plagued her in the past; didn’t want to deal with things that wouldn’t help her step into motherhood. But she knew that her parents were going to go through that same phase of shock that she went through, and would blast her with a million questions--some of which she would be happy to answer, while others she would let whip her across her back. She hated that she was being receptive to such things, but she knew that it was her parents’ right to be a little upset. She would do better at holding her tongue and taking their words, unlike she had done with Tenzin.

Taking a deep breath through her nose, Korra tried to wipe her mind. She would allow the oxygen to purify her troubling thoughts and she would exhale the remains. She would open her eyes and put a smile on her face; not to look brave or to look as though she was okay. No, she was doing it to keep herself positive. Tenzin always said that positive thinking was a way of life and that a smile was an effective tool, not in lying to one’s self, but to unlocking calm and happiness.

Korra would put this lesson to use whenever she thought about it, and she would try to look on the brighter side of things—though they certainly seemed few and far between. Until she could stumble across these happy jewels, she would just remain calm and remind herself that everything would work out just fine in the end. She wasn’t even sure if it would, but Tenzin seemed to think so, as did her friends and Pema. Maybe they were seeing something she wasn’t.

She wondered if Mako could see it too.

\------

Pema thanked the Spirits that she was a patient woman. She was blessed not only with patience, but rationality. Training as an air acolyte for many years had drawn out such traits from within her, and she found that she utilized them on a day to day basis. It was only recently, however, that she seriously thanked the Spirits for not only these things, but for her experience as well. When Korra had confided in her about her situation, Pema was able to assist Korra with her rationality. Since then, she was able to help the young woman by using her past child bearing experiences. But she found that her blessings were not only being used for Korra.

“And when I walked in to her room this morning…” Tenzin seemed to be having a hard time spitting out the entirety of his story, but he eventually got pasted his flustered agitation. “…she had a boy sleeping in her bed!”

Pema found that these saintly gifts she wielded were coming in handy for her husband, too. “And by a boy, you mean Mako, right?”

“Of course!” Tenzin scoffed. “And I tried explaining to her why having him sleep in her bed was wrong, but she just wouldn’t listen, and I couldn’t get through to her!”

Pema took a slow breath and kept her humoring smile present on her lips. She finished pouring the tea into the small cups and quietly ushered them onto the tray. Lifting it, she carefully made her way over to her husband and placed it next to him on the table. “Tenzin, don’t you think you might be overreacting?” Her voice was pleasant enough; the calming smell of the tea was keeping her relaxed, and she was hopeful that it would have the same affect on her husband. She placed on cup in front of him before grabbing her cup and sitting down.

The airbender gave his wife a mildly unimpressed look before speaking. “I’m not overreacting.” He picked up his cup gently, despite his simmering mood. “Korra should know better than to have a boy sleep in her bed. It looks bad.”

“To who?”

“To everyone else!”

“There is no one else!” Pema laughed. “No one outside of this island is going to see anything!”

“T-that’s not what I meant!” He crossed his arms and slouched forward.

Pema took a moment to examine her husband. She had known him long enough to know just what he was thinking, regardless of what his lips said. He had a bit of a pout on his face, but it was also escorted by a perturbed cloudiness in his eyes.

‘It looks bad to everyone else’ actually meant, ‘it looks bad to me’.

Pema sighed, allowing her finger tips to massage the sides of her ceramic cup. “Dear,” she started, “do you honestly think they would actually do anything?”

The shift of his eyes from his lap to the floor hinted to her his answer before he even spoke. “It didn’t stop them before,” he answered somewhat bitterly.

“True,” Pema agreed, “But if I recall, they were a bit under the influence.” She paused as she gazed into the warm tea in her cup. “But they aren’t now, and I think that after everything that’s happened they won’t be doing anything like sex any time soon.”

“You may be right.” Tenzin was willing to give her that much. “But that’s just it—they’ve done it, and they’ll probably want to keep doing it if the opportunity is there!”

“You’re right,” Pema said easily. “And now that they’re pregnant they don’t have that fear to stop them.” She leaned back ever so slightly, her hands still resting caringly around her tea cup. Her eyes closed for a moment as she took a deep breath and smiled. Perhaps she shouldn’t be so calm, but she attributed this demeanor to her confidence in her perception and her experience as a young woman and mother. “But I think we should give them a little more credit.”

“Sometimes I don’t think that they deserve it,” Tenzin admitted. He hated sounding so down on his student. He knew that she beat herself up over it all, and that she had a lot to deal with. He was proud of her for coming to her own decision and for being brave enough to face this new part of her life. But his student had shattered a piece of their trust. He trusted her to behave when she left the island and to stay out of trouble—at least trouble that didn’t involve her Avatar duties. Now that that trust had been defiled, he was constantly questioning what Korra and her friends were going to do next. And by ‘friends’, he almost always exclusively meant Mako.

“I just worry, Pema,” the airbending master admitted rather suddenly. He leaned forward and rested an elbow on the table. He pinched his nose between his fingers and closed his eyes. “I’ve never had to deal with something like this before. And no amount of training I ever went through—no amount of life experience—has ever prepared me for it. And even though I believe everything will work out in the end, I just wonder how much more heartbreak she might go through before then.”

“You mean with Mako, don’t you?”

He dropped his arms into his lap and rested his elbows on his thighs. He allowed his tired grey eyes to stare out the window aimlessly. “I know he’s been a close friend of hers for a while now. He is friendly; even the kids seem to like him. He works hard and is mindful of his manners—I commend him for it. And I know that Korra is fond of him…”

Pema followed her husband’s gaze out to the ocean; the waves were calm, much like the tea in her cup. The storm her husband had brought her had settled, but behind his cloudy eyes there brewed words left unspoken. When he didn’t continue, she turned her head to look at him and prodded him, “But?”

“But…” It was a few more moments before he spoke, but Tenzin made good on her question. “I don’t want to see her hurt because of him, or regret any decisions she makes because of him.”

“Oh, Tenzin…” Pema sighed idly, letting her shoulders sag. “You can’t protect her from everything. Besides, Mako seems to be a good guy. I mean, it’s like you said; he’s a hard worker and friendly, good with the kids, and Korra likes him just fine.” She thought she had packed his fears away with his own positive notions of Mako; reinforced the box the worries were in with duct tape and was ready to put them away in the attic. But then her husband ripped the box back open and put them back up on display for her.

“But he’s from the streets, Pema! People who live like that tend to have a ‘cut and run’ habit. They bail out when things get inconvenient or too tough for them. And as much of a good person as he seems to be, I just have to wonder…” Tenzin paused, debating if he should even issue his words to his wife. “I’m just wondering if that sort of behavior is so deeply ingrained in him from that life, that when the time comes he’ll leave her.”

Pema let her husband’s words sink in as she rolled the warm teacup between the palms of her hands. That was a legitimate fear; maybe even a warranted one, given the circumstances. People from the streets did tend to run from trouble, or go looking for it. But was that really something Mako would do? The young man had common sense, and a good head on his shoulders. He took care of his brother and was smart with his money. He helped Korra take down Equalists multiple times and even saved her during a few of those outings. Not to mention he had been genuinely concerned about Korra when she had first initially chose to terminate her pregnancy. And he was working so hard for the baby when he didn’t even have to. He was already saving up money to take care of it; Mako said it wasn’t much in the grand scheme of things, but it was a start.

“You know,” Pema started thoughtfully, “you may be right.” She put her hands over the opening of her cup and let the heat of the tea warm her hands. “He might leave her and never look back.” She gazed out the window and admired the simplicity of the ocean and clear skies. “But I don’t think he will.”

“What makes you say that?” Tenzin rested his right elbow on the table and looked at his wife. He lay his bearded chin in the palm of his hand and waited for her explanation.

“I think it’s because he’s from the streets; I think it’s because of that that he knows what’s right and what his convictions should be.” She took a deep breath. “I think his heart is in the right place. He’s taken care of his brother for years and he’s working hard to make things right.

“And besides…” She smiled widely at Tenzin. “I think he cares too much about Korra to just leave her.” Looking down, she removed her hands from her cup and let the cool air coat her warmed hands. “And Korra told me that he wants this child to have a father.”

“He might not mean it, you know,” Tenzin quietly said. “People tell lies to make other people happy.”

“You might be right.” Pema shrugged. “Maybe Korra does put a little too much faith in him, and maybe I’m following her lead a little too closely.”

“Maybe,” Tenzin mumbled. “I want to believe he’s a good person. But I still have this fear that he’s just playing her. So many men—young men off the streets and on the streets—only want one thing, and once they get it then they leave.”

“Tenzin.” Pema smiled cheekily. “He already got it.”

“Pema!”

She laughed; her laughter whimsical like tinkling bells on a spring afternoon. “What I’m trying to say is that he’s still here. We can’t keep worrying about stuff if it hasn’t even happened yet—you even said that yourself.”

“Yes, well-“

“And we don’t know if she’ll get hurt—if she does, she does; if she doesn’t, then she doesn’t. We can’t stop the either of them from doing what they want.”

“We could at least keep them from sleeping in the same room…” He brought this argument to the table and it somehow turned into a confessional. But he wasn’t about to leave without proving that he was right.

“No we can’t,” Pema hummed.

“And why not?!”

“Because they’re teenagers,” Pema answered simply, “with a baby on the way and with their lives ahead of them.”

She had heard them plenty of times; as Pema would pass down the hall that held Korra’s bedroom, she could pass Korra’s door and hear them talking softly and laughing. She even peered in through the crack of her door once or twice, and all she saw were two teenagers laying next to each others on their backs; memories in their eyes and the future on their smiling faces. And when she looked at the two of them, as Mako and Korra would look at each other, Pema could see their past-filled eyes flicker just a moment to reveal a possibility for the future. Pema knew that look: a look only shared between two people who were discovering themselves and each other, and slowly falling in love with each passing moment.

Maybe that was why she had so much faith in Mako; why she had so much faith in two teenagers. “I just don’t think that, when they fall asleep in the same bed, that they’re only thinking of one thing.” At least not all the time. She kept the thought from her husband; no need to give him a stroke.

Tenzin sighed; he was defeated. He knew when to lay things to rest, and this argument was no different. “I suppose, but I still don’t like it.”

“You can try to stop them all you want,” Pema replied. “All I ask is that you try to go a little easier on them.”

Tenzin crossed his arms, not really wanting to agree to her terms, but knowing full well that he should. He supposed he could admit, at least to himself for the time being, that he had over reacted just a tiny bit. He could have at least talked to Korra in private about it when he was calm and ask her why Mako had been in her bed in the first place. He would apologize to her later, but still tell her that he didn’t like them sleeping in the same bed and that he would prefer that they slept in separate rooms.

However, like Pema said, they were teenagers with a baby on the way, and their lives ahead of them.

\------

It was just after dinner when Tenzin was finally able to take time away from his council work and the Avatar-in-training to address the paper work that had, against all odds, doubled in size on his desk since yesterday. He sighed and trudged over to his chair and sat down, ready to take each packet, file, and article of mail one at a time.  
He took the first document off of the top of the pile and then looked at the clock on the wall to his left. Seven forty-five. Mako had missed dinner, and still hadn’t arrived back to the island. He had nonchalantly asked his student where the firebender was and she somberly replied that he was either at work or probending practice. Bolin, who was a common face at the dinner table these days, had piped in and said that he was probably either practicing for their match next week or lifting weights. “And then he has to turn right back around and go to work at five tomorrow.”

“You’re kidding?” Pema asked incredulously.

“Nope,” Bolin chirped in between chews. “The factory is low on firebending hands, so they’ve been working their people overtime.”

Tenzin then found out that the factory only had fifteen firebenders who were capable of producing electricity. Unfortunately, fifteen was too small a number to efficiently power the machinery and lines for the entire city. Because of the lack of workers, each worker was typically worked overtime; a person was lucky if they got at least one day of the week off.

Tenzin stared blankly at the document, feeling numb as his eyes skimmed the title at the top of the page. He couldn’t focus; his mind on other matters—ones that pertained to his student’s friend. He hadn’t really given Mako too much thought until recently. Maybe it was because the young man was over at the island far more often now, or maybe it was because he was in such a predicament with Tenzin’s student, but Tenzin didn’t know. All he did know was that, despite finding the boy in Korra’s bed and being skeptical about his priorities, he still worried about Mako.

The airbender leaned back in his chair, setting the papers down in front of him and then proceeding to stroke his beard. He regarded Mako’s work ethic with admiration and sympathy. Even before Korra had found herself pregnant with Mako’s child, he had heard enough from his student to know that the boy worked harder than any young man his age ever should. He strove hard in probending to keep a roof over his and his brother’s head and he worked at the power plant to make ends meet. He had enough stress on his plate as it was, and now there was a baby in the mix. Now it appeared that Mako was pushing himself even harder than before. Again, Tenzin admired that; the firebender he was so wary of was, at the very least, taking financial responsibility for his unborn child.

But Tenzin could see that all of that work and stress was taking its toll. Mako looked just a tad thinner, and his gate much slower. His posture was more slouched and his appetite didn’t seem to hold the same vigor as it had once before. Bags were forming under his amber eyes from lack of sleep. It even seemed like it took Mako a few more seconds to respond to simple questions and small talk than before—like his brain was taking longer to process what all was going on around him.

Tenzin knew that it wasn’t just the physical part of it that was waning Mako; it was the emotional part too. Here was this young man who had lost nearly everything as a child and pushed through all of his insecurities to provide for himself and his brother. He never really had a steady source of income and he had to worry about keeping him and Bolin sheltered, fed, and clothed; which Tenzin assumed was barely at all, considering their clothes seemed to be a bit tattered. Then of course Mako stressed over probending matches, which came with the territory of the game. Things looked up for a bit when he met Asami Sato, but alas, the cards weren’t there; alcohol was, though, and teenage hormones. Still, now this young man was shouldering the responsibility of becoming a father. He had no time to address his emotional issues with the matter, nor did he have time to take care of his physical being. Tenzin had only ever heard of Korra’s dealings with this upcoming parenthood, and he could only imagine what Mako was going through.

Pema was right—Mako was a good guy. Tenzin knew it to be true, but he still had his doubts-- and finding the young man in his protégé’s bed definitely impacted his opinion. Regardless, seeing the dark circles under Mako’s amber eyes and the poor boy’s exhausted posture was enough to make Tenzin feel sorry for him. The concern only intensified when he saw how Korra responded to it and heard how she felt.

The airbending master allowed his thoughts to flicker back to a suggestion he had made to Pema; one that was of airbending nomadic nature, but not one of his own character:

“What if we let the boys stay on the island?”

She had looked at him as if he had sprouted another head. She had asked what brought this idea out of him, and he explained his concerns. She readily agreed, though she still sounded a bit wary, considering the proposition wasn’t something she’d expect to hear from him.

The way Tenzin figured, having the boys live on the island would relieve Mako of paying for living and food expenses, which in turn would relieve stress and allow him to save up money for other things—such as new clothes for him and his brother, the baby, and he could save the rest of his money for later. Not to mention it would cut his commute time down; instead of running all around the city, he could start the day off at the island, go to work, practice, and then go back to the island. As of now Mako was starting off at the arena, going to work, going back to the arena, going to the island, and then going back to the arena and getting in late. It probably wouldn’t save him a lot of time, but it might alleviate a bit of pressure; or at least Tenzin told himself.

He had brought up the idea over a week ago; as to why Tenzin had yet to invite the boys to live under his roof, well…he had a few things holding him back. He supposed he wanted to wait just a bit longer to see how things would pan out. After this morning’s events he certainly found himself second-guessing the offer. But the other thing that kept him from talking to Mako about the idea was because Tenzin already knew the answer.

That boy would humbly decline and go on about his day.

Tenzin wouldn’t question it either. Whatever Mako’s decision was, he would accept it. Maybe some people couldn’t understand Mako’s way of thinking, but Tenzin understood it all too well.

There was a saying Tenzin had heard growing up: “A man’s conviction was to be respected, a man’s pride was to be revered, and a man’s love was to be admired.” And as he went through life he found it to be true. He knew better than to question a man’s convictions, and he knew that everything Mako was doing was for his own personal dogma. As much as it would pain him to watch such as young man wear himself down to his bones and threads trying to keep his world together, he would let it be.

He glanced at the clock again; eight o’clock. It was completely dark outside his office, aside from the few lamps that lighted the stone path. Tenzin saw something moving out of the corner of his eye, and turned around just in time to see Mako trudging along towards the entry of the main building. His gate was slow and he was a bit slouched; exhaustion radiated off of the firebender and could be felt all the way from Tenzin’s office. He held a bag in his gloved hand, while the other one was stuffed in his jacket pocket.

Tenzin sighed heavily. His conscience was tugging at his ear and whispering to him about all of the things he was brought up to believe, and it reminded him that Tenzin was a kind person who couldn’t leave anyone in a bind.

Running his hand over his face, Tenzin pushed himself out of his chair and made his way to his office door. He might not know how to feel about Mako’s role in Korra’s life right now, but he supposed he would have to push his conflicting feelings aside—for everyone’s benefit.

\------

Sure enough, when Tenzin spoke with Mako in the hall just minutes later, he got the answer he had anticipated. He had stopped Mako on his way to see Korra—just down the hall from her room. They exchanged brief small talk;

“How are you doing?”

“Fine, sir. And you?”

“I’m doing well—how was work?”

“Alright; just long.”

“I take it you’re on your way to see Korra?”

“Yes, sir.”

And that’s when he eased the conversation into the topic pertaining to Mako and Bolin’s current living arrangements. He brought up all of the concerns he had about Mako’s daily schedule and how stressful it must be for him, but he kept it short and decided it was best not to go into too much detail. Mako was a smart boy from what Tenzin had gathered. He was sure to pick up on all the underlying implications. And he knew that this was a straight up formal conversation—men’s talk, if it were to be called that. This wasn’t a conversation where the people involved revealed all their cards; emotion filled spades and begging diamonds. Mako wasn’t one to pour out his heart to just anyone, and Tenzin supposed he wasn’t really one to talk. But the airbender knew well enough to keep the request and the facts behind it simple.

So he asked.

And Mako declined.

Short, sweet, and just as predicted.

Mako thanked him for the offer, but respectfully told him that he was fine and could manage. He didn’t go into detail about how he could manage, but Tenzin assumed that he meant he would just work harder to make everything play out as smoothly as possible.

Tenzin asked if he was sure, just to give Mako another chance.

Again, Mako declined by nodding his head and giving a simple “yeah” in response.

Before taking his leave, Tenzin made sure Mako knew that their doors were always open for him and his brother. Mako nodded with a small courteous smile, and thanked him.

They parted ways: Tenzin back to his paperwork, and Mako to Korra. Mako played the proposition off and kept it to himself, and Tenzin sighed when he got back to his office and beheld his majestic mountain of paperwork.

Well, at least he tried to talk to Mako. He didn’t have time to worry about the young man now; Mako’s answer had been enough to get at least some of his festering concern off his back. For the time being, the airbending master would dismiss the troubling affair. He had paperwork up to his eyeballs, and if he wanted to get to bed at a decent hour, then he had better start working.

\------

She was pouting; no, pouting was too light of a word. Sulking was a much better description of Korra’s state of mind. Tenzin had informed after her training today that she would no longer be permitted to train physically. She knew that the restriction would be upon her eventually, but she hadn’t expected it to be so soon. She thought that she might be able to clear another month easy before having to sit around all day. But Tenzin reminded her that just because her body could still move vigorously, didn’t mean that she should. No, from now on she was going to be meditating, reading, and listening to Tenzin lecture her on airbending history and practices whenever he saw fit. The idea of doing any of those things left a bad taste in her mouth, and made her trudge to her room once dinner was over. Her mood only dropped more when she lay down on her bed only to find that lying on her stomach was no longer comfortable.

It was a little after nine when she heard a knock at her door. She already knew it was Mako, and numbly granted him permission to enter.

“Wow, what’s wrong with you?” Mako asked as he slid open Korra’s bedroom door. “You haven’t looked this down since Naga ate that batch of Water Tribe pastries your mom sent you.” He stepped inside and shut the door behind him.

“Ha-ha,” Korra bit wryly. “No, Tenzin just cut me off my training regiment.” She figured she should at least sit up to greet Mako; it wasn’t like it was his fault she was in such a bad mood. She propped herself up on her elbow before correcting herself, “Well, at least the physical part, anyway.” She completely sat up, crossing her legs and slouching forward with her elbows on her knees.

“Well, he told you that would happen, right?” Mako reminded. He stopped in the middle of her room, hoping to make some headway with this conversation before the contents of the bag went cold.

“Yeah,” she mumbled. “I guess I just wasn’t expecting it to be today though.”

“I guess a heads up would have been nice,” Mako said.

“Yeah,” Korra scoffed. “Just a little.” She was about to go on, but she noticed the plastic bag in Mako’s hand, “What’s in the bag?” She pointed and gave him a curious stare.

“Something I think that might help cheer you up,” Mako smiled. He sat across from Korra on her bed and handed her the bag. She took it from him, still looking between him and the bag, wondering what it could possibly be. When she started digging around inside, the smell of food assaulted her and the boxes inside appeared to be take out. She suddenly had a very good feeling about just what was in the take out boxes.

Once she had opened one of the boxes, the sadness that had been present on her face melted off in an instant, and it was replaced with a smile filled with excitement and eyes star-struck with gratitude. “You’re my favorite person in the world, you know that?”

“Well I mean, I know I’m great, but it’s always nice to be reminded.”

“Shut up,” Korra chuckled before lightly punching Mako in the shoulder. “But seriously, thank you.”

“Not a problem,” he smiled as Korra began to fish through the bag. “I know you’ve been talking about how much you’ve wanted meat lately, so I figured I’d stop by Narook’s and take advantage of the Water Tribe food there; that and I hadn’t eaten yet.” Mako couldn’t even begin to count how many times he had heard Korra mention how badly she wanted meat. It was a simple craving, but being on an island of vegetarians made finding such a delicacy difficult, and since Korra was on lock down, she couldn’t just go out to the city to get some. So in an effort to put a smile on her face, and maybe stop her complaining, Mako decided to oblige her food cravings. He supposed he should be grateful; at least Korra wasn’t craving anything ridiculous.

“How much do I owe you?” Korra asked as she took a take out box out of the bag.

“Nothing.” Mako shrugged as he reached into the bag and took out an identical box. “It’s on me.”

“Are you sure?” she asked. “I’m sure Tenzin wouldn’t mind reimbursing you—Spirits know he’s probably sick of me complaining about craving it.”

Mako couldn’t help but chuckle slightly; poor Tenzin had probably sighed more in the last week than he had in a long time. He’d have to save his breath, though-- there was still so much more to come. “It’s fine.” He immediately directed the conversation to a different topic—he didn’t need Korra trying to chide him spending money needlessly on her. “So what kind of training are you going to be doing now?”

Korra took a deep breath; of course Mako would dodge the topic of finances and work. She let it out in a noisy sigh, popping open the carryout box as she did so. “I’ll still get to do some light exercise, but other than that it’s meditation and lectures from the master.” The smoky smell of the meat shoved neatly off to the side of the box filled her nose and dimmed her snide attitude. She could swear the aroma was almost relaxing.

“Probably for the best,” Mako commented nonchalantly as he took a dumpling out of his box. “Maybe meditating more and reading will help you unlock your airbending.”

“Maybe.” Korra’s eyes shown with uncertainty and skepticism as she shrugged and averted her gaze.

“Well you’ll never know if you don’t try.” Mako offered her a smile. “Maybe spending more time doing those things will give you the boost you need.”

“Can we talk about something other than my airbending training?” Korra’s eyes pierced Mako like a spear. She didn’t like being reminded that she was practically an airbending failure. She’d been with the air nomads for over a year now and she had barely made any progress.

“Okay,” Mako started slowly. He wasn’t sure he should even tread into the next territory, but he felt like he should ask. He supposed they needed to start talking about it more and he didn’t want to seem like he didn’t care by not asking. “How’s the baby doing?”

“Ugh.” Korra visibly slouched as a heavy sigh escaped her gaping mouth. “Fine, I guess.” Her tone was borderline sardonic; the baby wasn’t exactly what she had in mind when she asked for a subject change. She still wasn’t comfortable talking about it. Granted, she was coming to terms with everything with each passing day, and she did care about it—she even found herself talking to it sometimes whenever things were quiet and she was by herself. She supposed she just wasn’t ready to openly talk about it with others yet. She hated the attention she got; how everyone’s eyes immediately zoned in on her stomach and how she felt like her identity was slowly being taken over by the child in her womb. “Still pregnant and still getting bigger.” Her eyes scanned the ceiling as she pondered whether or not her next words were too much information. “My boobs still hurt and my body is still changing at an unsettling rate.”

Mako’s eyes temporarily traveled with Korra’s at the mention of her chest. He wasn’t dumb—he had noticed that they had gotten bigger. He couldn’t help but restrain a chortle though at the memory of Bolin greeting her with a bear hug last week and Korra yowling in pain. Bolin immediately put her down, apologizing and asking what was wrong. Korra had been leaning over a tad with her arms wrapped around her chest. “My chest hurts,” she had said.

Of course, Bolin assumed that she meant ‘my heart/lungs/what-have-you’ hurt’. She then corrected him with an awkward gaze and a flatly stated, “My chest hurts.”

It took the earthbender about three seconds before he finally caught on to what Korra was insinuating. “Oh…oh gosh, I am so sorry!” Bolin’s face flushed red, and Mako decided it was time to take his leave, before Bolin embarrassed them any further.

“I guess that means everything’s going well,” Mako agreed casually, taking his eyes off of the ceiling to meet her blue eyes simultaneously. It was enough to make his heart skip a beat and bring a crooked smile to his tired face.

“Guess so.” Her smile mimicked his, and unknowingly, her heart mimicked his as well. “But enough about my weird bodily changes.” Korra offered Mako a smile. “How was your day?”

“It was alright. Work was long, but at least I’m off the day after tomorrow.” He took a moment to take a bite of his food. He hadn’t realized just how hungry he had been. Fatigue had numbed his stomach and before he knew it the day was nearly gone and he had hardly eaten at all.

“That’s good—you’ve been working too hard lately.”

“Nah, it’s fine.” Mako had to be quick on his feet when it came to talking to Korra about work. He knew just where the conversation could go if he wasn’t. “And probending practice went well.”

“How’s the new waterbender doing?” She had to say, she was a little bit jealous of the new recruit. Korra was the Fire Ferrets waterbender, and she couldn’t help but feel a little protective of her now-former title.

“He’s doing good. He’s still a little rough, but he’s coming around,” Mako replied as he scoped out his food to see which article would be his next target.

“Is he going to be ready in time for the match this weekend?”

“I think so.” He picked out his next article of food. “I think he’s just more nervous about facing the Rabaroo’s earthbender,” he chuckled.

Korra smiled. “Well, we’ll be listening on the radio and rooting for you.” Her heart skipped a beat, but it still made her smile lift a bit more, perhaps in nervousness. She hadn’t exactly meant to include their child in the statement, but she had added it to one of their pastimes. Maybe it couldn’t understand, let alone hear yet, but she liked to think the baby enjoyed listening to the probending matches on the radio as much as she did.

Mako chuckled, and her plural seemed to go unnoticed. “Thanks.”

They ate, but hardly stopped talking. Bits of small talk, idle jokes, and recollections littered between bites and swallows. Glances, smiles, and secret heart palpitations brought forth laughter and subtle blushes.

And for a while, Korra forgot about what had been upsetting her before. This was always her favorite part of the day—sitting and talking with Mako, and just being. Mako wouldn’t say it out loud, at least not to Korra at the given moment, but these visits were his favorite part of the day, too.

\------

The next morning Korra was getting ready to start her first day of lightweight training and heavy meditation. She wasn’t really looking forward to it, yet she found that she was coming to accept it with more vigor than she had the day before. Maybe Mako was right—maybe she just needed to spend more time meditating and reading to connect with her airbending. Tenzin had been telling her the same thing for nearly two years, but it was only now that her body was gradually being rendered enabled that she was beginning to consider that he might be right. Korra figured that she should at least try to make the best of her new training regiment, anyway; no use in pouting over it, or else she wouldn’t make it anywhere with Tenzin, let alone airbending.

A soft knock reverberated through Korra’s door and into her room. She hurriedly slipped her shirt on over her head before calling out for her visitor to come in. When she saw Tenzin step through the threshold, she assumed that he was coming in to either chide her to hurry up or to inform her of a change of plans. However, once she saw the envelope in his hand her blood ran cold from the anxiety that blossomed in her veins.

When he told her that the letter was from her parents her stomach plummeted and her heart raced, pumping the anxiety faster through her.

“It came in the mail yesterday, but I hadn’t had time to go through the mail until late last night,” he mentioned as she handed it to her.

Korra looked at the envelope with apprehension before gingerly taking it from her teacher. She slowly pulled it out of his hands, swearing that it would have fallen apart had she not handled it gently. She stared at the mail numbly and she bit the inside of her lip and rolled it between her teeth.

“I’m sure everything is going to be fine,” Tenzin reassured her.

“Yeah,” she agreed verbally, but her eyes betrayed her as she looked at her teacher.

“Would you like for me to stay?”

“No…It’s okay.”

“Alright.” Tenzin turned to leave. He gave her one last look over her shoulder before departing. “Let me know if you need anything.”

She nodded numbly, knowing that he meant if she needed a shoulder to cry on, then he was there. She appreciated the support, but right now she didn’t want anyone. The last thing Korra needed was for someone to see her falling apart while she read her parents’ response. She had been worrying about their reply nonstop since she and Asami had sent off the letter a week and a half ago; she had been counting the days and imagining which day her parents had probably got the news.

Still, this was it. This letter could easily confirm her fears or put them to rest. But at least the waiting would be over; she would have an answer. Whatever the outcome of the letter, she could take it and move on—even if moving on entailed her to cry and pick up the pieces of her broken heart in shame.

Korra slipped her finger under the secured flap of the envelope and began tearing it open. The sight of the paper inside made her heart jump and the palms of her hands tingle.

She handled the letter itself with such care, as if it were going to break, but she knew that she only used gentle motions because she knew that the letter could break her.

She unfolded it and her eyes immediately jumped to the top:

_Korra,_

_We’re not really sure where to begin or what to say—it actually took us a few days to come to accept this news and to come up with a decent letter to send you. Even now, we’re still very concerned and shocked._

_Korra breathed nervously through her nose, but her mind took relief when she noticed that this was her mother’s handwriting. It made the Avatar feel much better knowing that her mother was writing the response; while both of her parents were sound and reasonable people, her mother was always much more so than her father._

_We definitely weren’t expecting a letter from our daughter telling us that she’s pregnant. It’s not something we were expecting to hear—not until you were married at least._

_But your father and I let it sink in for a few days before writing to you, and we’re both glad that you tried to tell us everything you could through your letter. Though we still have a few questions,_

_Is it really safe for you and the baby in the city? What kind of person is Mako? Is he really willing to stay and be a father? How are you going to train if you’re pregnant? How does Tenzin feel about this? How do you feel about this?_

_We’re sure you know that there’s a lot that goes into taking care of a baby—but we’re just concerned about whether you really know what you’re in for._

_But we know you, and we agree that coming home would be the wrong choice for you. And we understand wanting to keep Mako involved, even if we don’t know him very well. We’re just going to have to trust your judgment until we get to meet him ourselves. But we hope, despite how much of a jerk you’ve told us he is, that he still treats you right and is willing to take on this responsibility with you._

_You’re right, though—you can only disappoint people if you’re disappointed in yourself. You have to do what’s right for you, and it makes us very proud that you’ve come to that decision._

_We just want you to know that, no matter what happens, we love you and we support you in everything you do. While we certainly weren’t expecting to be grandparents anytime soon, we’re still here for you. Never think we’ll stop loving you because you hit a bump in the road._

_We promise that you’re still our little girl; we’ll always be proud of you. Have confidence in yourself; we believe you can do anything you put your mind to. It’s only a wrong turn if you think of it that way._

_We want to come visit you some time—to get more questions answered and to help you in any way we can. We’ll talk to Tenzin and Pema to arrange a time to come up, but until then, letters are going to have to do._

_We love you so much and can’t wait to hear from you and see you,_

_Mom and Dad_

Korra had been biting the inside of her bottom lip through the entire letter, and her breathing had been a bit uneven as well. But once she reached the end of the letter, all signs of nervousness dissipated, and made way for the relief that was swelling in her chest. She wiped her eyes, too happy to realize that a thin layer of tears has coated them. She smiled, and even let out a chuckle.

They still loved her; she was still their daughter, and they wanted to make sure that she knew that through their letter. They didn’t seem too disappointed, which she hadn’t expected, and they were obviously concerned. But what had her on the brink of tears and on the verge of hysterical laughter was the support that had been conveyed through her mother’s handwriting. She could practically hear her voice—every nuance and emotion. It almost made her feel silly for worrying so much.

She wished her parents were there right now; to hug them and thank them, and to laugh and cry in their arms. She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so grateful and so relieved. They supported her and had faith in her, loved her and were proud. All of Korra’s worries, while justifiable, were now null and void.

She continued wiping her eyes as her smile trembled. When she caught a moment in between each film of tears, she took a deep breath and looked around her.

Everything felt new; her room was bathed in the bright morning light of the sun, and a few dust particles danced as they ascended upward out her window. For the first time in months, she felt light as a feather and as strong as an ox mole—like she could take on the world.

Korra set the letter, barely folded, on her desk, and continued getting dressed.

She would write them a response later in the day.

She had meditating with Tenzin to get to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Congrats! You guys are all caught up with the story thus far! Unfortunately for you, now you have to wait for updates just like everyone else. Thanks for reading!_


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